Name
Sophomore English
This packet is designed to assist you with all facets of good writing. After completing the activities in the packet and in class, you will be more equipped to write an effective essay. Then, as a culmination to the argumentative writing unit, you will be asked to write an in-class argumentative essay using articles that will be provided for you. All writing for this assignment must be done in-class and not outside of school. This essay is your state standards assignment for the second quarter of sophomore English and is worth 40% of your second quarter grade.
If you have an excused absence on essay writing day, you must make arrangements with your teacher to come to class during academic lab. Excused absence students will have the same number of days to make up the essay as they were absent. For example, if you are absent on the assigned essay writing day, you only have one class day to make up the essay with your teacher, so be prepared. Students with an unexcused absence on essay writing day will receive zero points for this essay. Students swept on essay writing day must see their teacher that same day and write their essay after school or receive a zero.
What is argumentative writing?
Argumentative writing is a mode of writing intended to win the readers’ agreement. It requires the student to investigate a topic; collect, generate, and evaluate evidence; and establish a position on the topic in a concise manner. It should include ethos, logos, and pathos and focus mostly on logical and credible evidence to prove a point. In any profession you pursue, you will do research, think about what you find, make decisions about complex matters, and then explain those decisions—usually in writing.
By the end of this unit, students should be able to:
• Examine argument rhetoric used in the film Twelve Angry Men and create a movie review for the film.
• Recall from prior knowledge how to organize a multi-paragraph essay by labeling each part on a graphic organizer.
• Create an essay as a pre-test to show prior knowledge of essay writing skills then judge which essay is the best in class.
• Review the writing process by taking notes about each step.
• Practice prewriting skills by labeling SOAPSTone for multiple writing prompts and planning/organizing essays using various types of graphic organizers.
• Compare and contrast parts of the Six + 1 Traits writing rubric.
• Recognize common proofreading symbols and abbreviations and utilize them in peer editing activities.
• Recognize and develop common attention getters/hooks and clinchers used in essays.
• Identify different types of transitions used in writing to improve fluency.
• Collaborate to edit and transform the voice, word choice, and sentence fluency of a poorly written story.
• Review MLA format and integrate it into essay writing.
• Read, edit, separate into parts, and evaluate/grade a model five-paragraph essay.
• Plan, organize, create, and self-evaluate a five-paragraph essay about given prompts. The essay will be evaluated by and students will use that evaluation to make corrections and resubmit the paper for a higher grade.
• Peer-edit an essay and critique it using the 6 + 1 Traits grading rubric.
• Read articles, and use those articles to support a claim.
• Use CECs (claim, evidence, commentary) to write an argumentative paper.
Twelve Angry Men Viewing Guide
Directions: As you watch the film, answer the following questions on a separate sheet of paper. To save time, you do NOT need to use CECs.
1. Where does the movie start?
2. What is the weather like?
3. In the first vote, how many people vote “not guilty”?
4. What did the boy supposedly say before he killed his father?
5. Through what did the woman witness say she saw the murder?
6. What does one of the jurors say was the boy’s motive?
7. Name one of the boy’s past crimes.
8. In regards to the juror whose son left him – how is he going to be biased towards this trial?
9. How many eyewitnesses were there to the murder?
10. Where was the boy supposedly at 11:30 on the night of the murder?
11. Why don’t the jurors believe this alibi?
12. What does the juror who believes the boy may be innocent produce that makes some of the jurors rethink their vote?
13. What is the result of the 2nd vote? 3rd vote?
14. What is the result of the 4th vote?
15. Why do you think people are changing their votes?
16. How long did the elderly witness say it took him to go from his bed to the door?
17. How does the juror prove that that time was false?
18. How many vote “not guilty” in the 5th vote?
19. What is a hung jury?
20. How did the boy supposedly stab his father? And how does the juror from the slums say that you use a switchblade?
21. In the 6th vote, how many still hold with the guilty plea? Why haven’t they changed their minds about the boy’s guilt? What are their reasons?
22. Explain the last piece of evidence about the indentations on the woman’s nose.
23. How does this new evidence ruin the credibility of the woman’s testimony?
24. Why did the last juror hold out as long as he did? Why do you think he finally changed his mind?
25. Give one example of when a juror appealed to logos.
26. Give one example of when a juror appealed to pathos.
Movie Review for Twelve Angry Men
Directions: Now’s your chance to play movie critic! Tell your class how you really feel about the film Twelve Angry Men by writing your very own movie review. Using your viewing guide, your opinions, and the sample movie reviews to critique the movie. Your review should be TWO paragraphs long (6-8 sentences per paragraph) with the following information in each paragraph.
First paragraph
• Introduce and summarize the movie’s plot—no more than three sentences
• Critique at least one plot device (i.e. characters, setting, climax, resolution, etc.) you liked or disliked in the film—at least three sentences
Example: “I did not like some of the acting in the movie because it seemed forced. This was illustrated when the man broke down at the end of the film as he talked about his son. He really overacted here.”
Second paragraph
• Critique at least one element of film making that you liked/disliked in the film (lighting, black/white vs. color, editing, sound effects, music, few cameras, close-ups, etc.)—should be at least two sentences
Example: “I enjoyed the film’s music score because it really helped heighten the suspense. For instance, when the audience first sees the defendant in court, the background music is very ominous.”
• Explain why you do or do not recommend this film to future audiences and give it a ranking (make up your own scoring system—like two out of four stars, or two out of three smiley faces, etc.)—should be at least four sentences
***Reminder: Always use logos, ethos, and pathos when you write an argument!!***
How to Organize an Essay
Directions: Using your prior knowledge about essay organization, on the blank lines write the name for each part of a multi-paragraph essay.
Notes to Review the Writing Process
1. Prewriting—
S.—
O.—
A.—
P.—
S.—
Tone --
2. Drafting—
3. Revising—
4. Proofreading—
5. Publishing—
*DEAD WORDS:
*BEWARE
Hint: Please Do Really Perfect Papers (PDRPP) can help you remember the steps.
SOAP Prewriting Activity
Directions: Read the following writing prompt. Then, fill in the blanks using SOAPSTone to analyze the prompt.
Phil Gordon, the mayor of Phoenix, is trying to decide if a 7:00 p.m. curfew for children under the age of 16 is needed. He is taking suggestions from members of the community. What do you think? Write an essay in which you convince your reader to either enact (change) the present curfew from 10:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. or not.
S=Subject: ____________________________________________________________________
O=Occasion: __________________________________________________________________
A=Audience: __________________________________________________________________
P=Purpose: ___________________________________________________________________
S=Speaker: ____________________________________________________________________
T=Tone: __________________________________________________________________
Directions: Now brainstorm ideas that you could include in your essay by creating a web, outline, or list in the blank space below:
Delete.
Close up.
Delete & close up.
Put back deleted material.
Add letter, word.
Change letter, word.
Make space.
Transpose letters or words.
Add commas.
Add period.
Add an apostrophe.
Change to capital.
Change to lower case.
Start new paragraph.
Add quotation marks.
No new paragraph; run together.
I love all the traits.
Bar ry Lane is cool.
The traits rocck.
Voice is my all time favorite trait.
Mem Fox write.
I live to edit.
I have e-mailoverload!
What an editro Lynn is.
His writing has voice, flavor and fluency.
Begin with flair
This was Freds idea.
fred has such humor.
Barry’s a Witty Guy too.
“Write!” yelled Fred. “Should I include voice?” I asked.
I like fluency best, Sally said.
Editing is more fun than TV.
It’s more fun than river rafting- or even fishing.
|Abbreviation |Meaning |Example |
|Awk |awkward expression |The storm had the effect of causing millions of dollars in damage. |
| |or construction | |
|Frag |fragment |Depending on the amount of snow we get this winter and whether the towns buy new trucks. |
|Rep |Unnecessary repetition |The car was blue in color. |
|R-O |run-on sentence |Raoul tried his best this time that wasn't good enough. |
|Sp |spelling error |This sentence is flaude with two mispellings. |
|Wdy |wordy |Seldom have we perused a document so verbose, so ostentatious in phrasing, so burdened with|
| | |too many words. |
|WC |wrong word/word choice |What affect did the movie have on Sheila? She tried to hard to analyze its conclusion. |
Tips for Persuasive Essay Ideas and Content
1. Like any other persuasive work, remember the rhetorical triangle.
2. ________ ____________—Logical reasons or examples are the best method of persuasion. Avoid logical fallacies like circular reasoning, hasty generalization, etc.
3. ________ ____________—How will you gain the audience’s trust? What will you say that builds your credibility?
4. ________ ____________—Emotional appeals such as loaded words or sad/shocking stories (anecdotes) to make your audience feel the way you want them to.
Title
1. Often _______________________, your essay’s title will set the stage for the rest of your work.
2. _____________________________ as you can be coming up with a title that best fits
your main idea.
3. The best time to write the tile is ____________ you have written the essay; however, don’t forget to go back and create a title before you hand in your essay.
Structure of Introduction:
1. _____________________________________________________________
2. _____________________________________________________________
3. _____________________________________________________________
ALWAYS END WITH THE THESIS STATEMENT!!!
Attention Getters:
*An ATTENTION GETTER hooks
your reader into your essay*
Here are some types of Attention Getters and
examples for an essay about the dangers of smoking:
1. Anecdote: ______________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
Example: As I visualize my grandfather, the same picture comes to my mind. It is that of a man standing with a cigarette in his hand. I can’t remember a time when my grandfather wasn’t smoking. He was truly addicted to nicotine.
2. Statistic: ___________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________________________________
Example: According to the Surgeon General, 250,000 Americans die of lung cancer every year (Helms 9)
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
3. Quotation:
___________________________________________________________________________
8. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
_______________
Example: “Smoking is the most harmful habit a teenager can have” (Kline 34).
4. Question: ____________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
Example: Is it possible that tobacco companies will stand by and allow millions of Americans to perish as a result of the products they make?
5. Definition: ___________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________
Example: Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary defines a terminal illness as one that will definitely kill a person (1,194) Getting lung cancer as a result of smoking is a perfect example of a terminal illness.
6. Generalization: ___________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Example: All smokers face the possibility of a premature death.
Thesis Statements
1. _________________________________________________________________
2. _________________________________________________________________
3. _________________________________________________________________
4. _________________________________________________________________
Example Thesis Statements: (is this statement pro or con?)
1. Student lockers should not be searched because it is an invasion of privacy, a sign of lack of trust, and a judgment of guilt without proof.
2. By allowing lockers to be searched the rise of drugs and weapons on campus will slow almost immediately, schools will be left safer, and those who are guilty will be caught.
Label Parts of the Thesis:
Student lockers should not be searched because it is an invasion of privacy, a sign of lack of trust, and a judgment of guilt without proof.
Three Body Paragraphs
1. Each body paragraph should start with a ______________ _______________ that states one argument or claim defending your thesis. Make sure this argument is important enough to devote an entire paragraph to in your essay.
2. You may want to start with your _____________ _______________ in your first body paragraph, OR you may wish to save the best argument for your third body paragraph. It’s up to you.
3. Include _______________ ___________________ that help prove your argument/claim. These sentences avoid logical fallacies altogether. In addition, leave your personal bias out as much as possible since it may weaken your points. Instead, build your argument with evidence (most important to least) in each body paragraph.
4. It is acceptable in your supporting sentences (or throughout your essay) to ask _____________________ regarding your issue about which the audience might be wondering. Just make sure that you answer these questions somewhere in the essay, and don’t go overboard asking too many questions.
5. End each body paragraph with a ____________________ ___________________ that summarizes that paragraph or transitions to the next paragraph. (The third body paragraph should end with a sentence that merely summarizes. There is no need to transition from it to your conclusion.)
Body Paragraph Structure (_____ to _____ sentences)
1. ______________________: (Prong from Thesis Statement and main idea of paragraph)
2. ______________________: Facts, Statistics, Quotes
3. ______________________: Explain why the example supports your topic.
4. ______________________: Facts, statistics, Quotes
5. ______________________: xplain why the example supports your topic.
6. ______________________: Should summarize and transition into next paragraph.
Optional 4th Body Paragraph
1. The best persuasive essays (the ones that earn an “A”) include a body paragraph that discusses the ____________________________ so that the reader will know that you have considered another point of view and have a rebuttal to it. In other words, this is your opportunity to give arguments against the opposite side of the issue by blasting its ideas as unreasonable, unethical, socially irresponsible, ineffective, too costly, etc.
Conclusion
1. Start by ____________________ (not repeating) your thesis statement.
2. Write three sentences that summarize, in order, each of your three body paragraphs.
3. ____________________ to your clincher.
4. End with a _________________. This is your chance to give your final plea. Maybe predict what could happen if your position is ignored or laws are not changed. Perhaps call for action by telling your reader what to do next, who to call, etc. Turnaround could also be effective by referring to the title of your essay. Whichever of these you choose, make sure to end on a strong note so that your reader will say, “I agree with this essay,” or “I may not have changed my mind about this issue based on this essay, but it was still very persuasive.”
Clinchers:
*A CLINCHER gives closure to your reader*
Here are some types for an essay about the dangers of smoking:
1. An anecdote: End by telling a story that pertains to your main idea. Better yet, tell the _______________ of the anecdote you used as your attention getter.
Example: Unfortunately my grandfather never overcame his addiction. He got lung cancer from smoking for so many years and died at the age of 57. I was only three years old when he passed away. Finally, I wish he had never smoked so that he would have lived a longer and healthier life.
2. A prediction: Make an educated guess about ______________________ based on what you know about your topic.
Example: In the years to come, people will be more wise about the dangers of smoking and will choose to not begin smoking in the first place.
3. A quotation: Like in an attention getter, choose a passage from literature and list the author. Do not use a quote to begin AND end your essay. That’s repetitive.
4. A question: Ask something at the end of your essay that will cause your reader to
______________ on the _____________________________________________________.
Example: With all the shocking evidence that exists about the dangers of smoking, why would anyone choose to start smoking at all?
5. Turnaround: Make a statement that refers to the ______________ of your essay.
Example: (If your essay’s title is “Smoking Stinks” then your clincher could be): Smoking stinks not only because it makes a person wreak of a bad, smoky smell but also because it is so harmful to one’s health.
6. A recommendation: ________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
Example: With all the evidence proving the deadly effects of smoking, the federal government should enact laws banning smoking in any public place.
7. A generalization: __________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
Example: Unlike most other bad habits, it is a certainty that smoking for an extended amount of time will kill.
Tips for Evaluation
This essay will be evaluated using the 6 + 1 Traits rubric which follows:
1. _________________________
Does the essay use strong facts to convince the audience?
2. _________________________
Is the essay organized as this handout directs with many transitions?
3. ________________________
Does the essay show the reader’s personality, and does it sound professional?
4. _________________________
Does the essay use powerful, loaded words and figurative language?
5. _________________________
Do all sentences in the essay flow, and do sentence beginnings vary?
6. _________________________
Does the essay follow the rules of spelling, grammar, punctuation, and usage?
7. _________________________
Is the essay neatly handwritten using MLA format explained in this packet?
Attention Getter/Clincher Activity
Directions: Write the correct Attention Getter or Clincher after each example below (i.e. Definition, Generalization, Anecdote). Also, indicated whether it is an Attention Getter or Clincher by circling AG of C (can be both). Some terms may be used more than once.
1. According to The Arizona Republic, over 65% of the rides at most state fairs are unsafe (A1). __________________________ AG or C
2. Fear is defined as a feeling of agitation and anxiety caused by present or imminent danger (Webster 232). __________________________________ AG or C
3. Is it necessary to take safety precautions at the Arizona State Fair? _________________________ AG or C
4. Author Stewart Crenshaw states, “Nearly all amusement companies sacrifice profits for safety” (71). __________________________________ AG or C
5. As a fifteen-year-old boy and his nineteen-year-old sister rise up to the top of the Ferris wheel, the ride comes to a sudden stop. ________________________ AG or C
6. As rides at the Arizona State Fair become more unsafe, more people are at risk of serious injury and, possibly, death._______________________ AG or C
7. All owners of amusement park rides take poor care of their equipment. ___________ AG or C
8. Being stuck one hundred feet in the air, the fifteen-year-old boy’s worried little nine-year-old sister grips his hand tightly and begins to shed tears. Children such as these should never be at the mercy of faulty amusement park rides. _________________________ AG or C
9. On average people spend about $75 for an evening at a state fair (Cooper 84). ___________________ AG or C
10. Why are so many people afraid to go on state fair rides? _______________________ AG or C
11. To ensure public safety, state officials need to inspect the rides at the Arizona State Fair on a weekly basis. ______________________________________________ AG or C
6 + 1 Traits Grading Rubric—Persuasive Essay
| Trait | 6 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 1 |
| | | | | | | |
|Ideas |Fresh insights |Clear, focused thesis|Clear thesis |Identifiable thesis |Inferred thesis |No thesis/detail |
|and Content |Much thought |Credible support |Limited/ predict-able |Simplistic/broad |Irrelevant info. |Unclear info. |
| |Superb development |Balanced info. |details |Few details |No support |Repetitious |
| |Extremely convincing |Effective development|Lacks balance |Some logical fallacies|Full of fallacies |Incomplete |
| | |Very convincing |Confusing at times |Not very convincing |Not convincing at |Not a persuasive |
| | | |Somewhat convincing | |all |essay |
| | | | | | | |
|Organization |Essay structure is |Essay structure |Formulaic essay |Order of paragraphs |Incomplete essay |Random, disjointed |
| |perfect |nearly perfect |structure |incorrect |structure |paragraphs |
| |Strong intro/ |Satisfying |Intro/conclusion not |Intro/conclusion too |Missing main part(s)| |
| |conclusion |intro/conclusion |subtle |short |of the essay | |
| |Logical sequencing of|Details fit in place |Few details |Few transitions |No transitions | |
| |body paragraphs |in each paragraph |Some transitions or | | | |
| |Smooth transitions |Good transitions |problem with | | | |
| | | |transitions | | | |
| | | | | | | |
|Voice |Connected to audience|Straightforward |Unsure of |Limited sense of |Flat, lifeless |Lifeless |
| |Expressive |Aware of audience |audience/limited |audience |Too informal using |Uninvolved |
| |Engaging |Lively/attempts |connection |Mechanical |second person “you” |Monotone |
| |Sincere |creativity |Casual, stiff |Impersonal |or contractions | |
| |Screams to be read | |Has less personality |No sense of author in | | |
| |aloud | | |essay or goes | | |
| | | | |overboard | | |
| | | | | | | |
| |Precise/powerful |Accurate/specific |Lacks energy |Ordinary lang. |Monotonous |Limited |
|Word Choice |Fresh, original |Purposeful |Less figurative |Generic |Imprecise |Vague |
| |Striking vocab. |Natural vocab. |language |Misused words |Repetitious |Slang |
| |Much figurative |Clear images |Thesaurus overload |Cliches |No fig. lang. |Poor verbs |
| |language like |Some clever fig. |Some active verbs |Fig. lang. is |Ineffective verbs | |
| |simile/metaphor |lang. | |simplistic | | |
| |Active verbs sparkle |Many active verbs | |Few active verbs | | |
| | | | | | | |
|Sentence |Fluid, rhythmical |Crafted/mostly varied|Less fluid |Mechanical |Choppy or rambling |Jerky |
|Fluency |Sentence vari-ation |sentences that sound |Somewhat varied |Repetitive sent. |sentences throughout|Confusing |
| |enhances meaning |natural |Repeated sent. |patterns |Awkward sentences |Rambles |
| |Stylistic control |Can read aloud with |patterns |Little control of |Monotonous sent. | |
| |It’s a breeze to read|only one or two tough|Some choppiness |complex sent. |patterns | |
| | |moments |interferes with | | | |
| | | |reading | | | |
| | | | | | | |
|Conventions |Exceptional mastery |Control of |Needs fine tuning |Limited control of |Needs major editing |Errors make writing |
| | |conventions |Some paragraph errors |conventions |No paragraphing |unreadable |
| |Paragraph control | | |Repetitive mistakes | | |
| |Ready to publish |Few errors | |Needs editing | | |
| | |Paragraphs solid | |Paragraphing errors | | |
| |MLA format is |MLA format contains |MLA format contains |MLA format is wrong or|MLA format not |No format |
|Presentation |perfect—margins, |only one error total |two or three errors |missing in header, |followed at all |Essay is handwritten |
| |header, heading, |in header, heading, |total in header, |heading, double |Essay is handwritten|poorly instead of |
| |double spacing, |double spacing, |heading, double |spacing, indents, |neatly instead of |typed |
| |indents, and title |indents, and/or title|spacing, indents, and |and/or title |typed | |
| |Typed in correct and |Typed in an |title |Typed in hard to read | | |
| |consistent font/size |inconsistent |Typed in readable but |font/size | | |
| | |font/size |less clear/consistent | | | |
| | | |font/size | | | |
How do I add VOICE and personality to my writing?
This paragraph shows you how to add voice and also shows you how to blast the opposing side.
Sample body paragraph from an essay about a 7:00 pm curfew
While some might argue that a 7:00 curfew for teens is necessary, it will do more harm than good. For example, those who favor this curfew change believe it would allow families to spend more time together. While this is a lovely thought, it is simply unrealistic. Do most teens really want to spend more time with their parents/siblings? Probably not. Therefore, forcing this issue might just cause families who usually get along to begin fighting. How does this help society? Furthermore, those on the other side of this issue argue that it is really a safety issue. With fewer teens on the streets after 7:00, the city is safer. Nothing could be further from the truth because a seventeen-year old may be just as likely to cause problems at 9 pm as a fourteen-year old. In my own neighborhood, a twelve-year old was arrested for smashing cacti on people’s lawns at 6:30 pm while a sixteen-year old was arrested for breaking into cars at 10:00. The hour is not really the issue and neither is the age. Delinquents are delinquents regardless of age or time. A curfew change does not really solve the problem of cutting down crime. All in all, the earlier curfew does not improve society in any way.
Tips:
1. Clever word choice adds to voice. Example from above: “lovely thought”
2. Asking questions adds voice. Example from above: “How does this help society?”
3. Add a personal anecdote/story from your life to add to your voice. Example from above is the cactus story.
4. Say something sad, funny and emotional to show your personality. This paragraph does not have an example of this, but yours should! (
Word Choice Matters
Three elements to focus on to improve word choice:
1. Striking vocabulary—Why use a big word when a little one will do? Well, in persuasive writing, a creative loaded word can help make your writing more convincing. For example:
• The bad guy in the movie made me feel fear.
• The nefarious villain in The Ring forced me to cringe in horror.
Notice how the second sentence, with its use of precise and loaded words, is much more powerful. Just make sure you understand the definition of a new word you use in your writing so that you use it correctly!
2. Figurative language—What makes your words come alive are similes/metaphors/personification/hyperbole that create lingering images or pictures in the reader’s mind. Here are some stellar examples that may even add a little humor or emotion to your essay:
• Watching that movie was like carving a statue out of stone with a butter knife—tedious, time consuming, and excessively boring. (Simile)
• E.E. Cummings wrote, “Life is not a paragraph.” That’s for sure; it’s more of a long Shakespeare play that’s full of drama and hard to understand. (Metaphor)
• As I listened to the song, the lyrics grabbed my heart and shattered it on the tile floor. (Personification)
• Every inch of your room is covered with junk! (Hyperbole)
3. Active verbs—Instead of using ineffective or repetitive verbs so often in your essay, why not use more sparkling verbs? Weak verbs creep into our sentences but do little to add to persuasiveness. For example:
• The best part of the film was when the creature walked across the field because I was so scared.
• The best part of the film occurred when the creature skulked across the field because fright welled up within me.
Obviously, the second sentence is better due to more descriptive verbs.
[pic]
What’s wrong with the sentence fluency of this paragraph?
Smoking is a disgusting habit. Many people still choose to do it. Those who smoke have breath that reeks. Smoking makes one’s clothes smell. They smell from its stench. They do not care about others when they smoke. They just light up. They ignore the second-hand smoke that invades the lungs of everyone around. It is bad enough to degrade one’s own lungs. It is not acceptable to harm others. Deadly lung cancer is an affliction caused by smoking. Emphysema is caused by smoking. Most citizens know someone who smokes. These citizens do not smoke themselves. Why would anyone start to smoke in the first place? Everyone knows it is smelly. It is also dangerous.
• Notice how many sentences start with the same word?
• In a paragraph, no two sentences should start with the same word.
• Also, some of the sentences are short and choppy.
• That makes them hard to read because they do not flow.
Here are some guidelines for improving sentence fluency:
1. Combine sentences to form a compound sentence:
• by inserting a comma and a conjunction.
Ex: Smoking is a disgusting habit, yet many people still choose do it.
• by inserting a semicolon.
Ex: Smoking is a disgusting habit; many people still choose to do it.
• by inserting a semicolon, a transitional word, and a comma.
Ex: Smoking is a disgusting habit; however, many people still choose do it.
2. Add a transition and a comma at the beginning of a sentence.
Ex: As an example, people who smoke have breath that reeks.
3. Combine sentences by using a prepositional phrase.
Ex: Smoking makes one’s clothes smell from its stench.
Better yet, start the sentence with a prepositional phrase.
Ex: From its stench, smoking makes one’s clothes smell.
4. Combine sentences by starting the sentence with an –ing phrase.
Ex: Not caring about others when they light up, smokers ignore the second-hand smoke that invades the lungs of everyone around.
5. Combine sentences by starting the sentence with an infinitive (the word “to,” followed by a verb).
Ex: To degrade one’s own lungs is bad enough, but to harm others is unacceptable.*
*Notice how a comma and a conjunction are also used to combine.
6. Combine sentences by using a compound subject (or verb).
Ex: Deadly lung cancer and emphysema are afflictions caused by smoking.
-- Turn to next page –
7. Combine sentences by using an essential (or nonessential) phrase.
Ex: Most citizens who do not smoke themselves know someone who does.
8. Combine sentences using a variety of methods.
Ex: Knowing it is smelly and dangerous, why would anyone start smoking in the first place?
Now read the improved paragraph to see how much better it flows:
Smoking is a disgusting habit, yet many people still choose to do it. As an example, people who smoke have breath that reeks. From its stench, smoking makes one’s clothes smell. Not caring about others when they light up, smokers ignore the second-hand smoke that invades the lungs of everyone around. To degrade one’s own lungs is bad enough, but to harm others is unacceptable. Deadly lung cancer and emphysema are afflictions caused by smoking. Most citizens who do not smoke themselves know someone who does. Knowing it is smelly and dangerous, why would anyone start smoking in the first place?
List of Transitions
Use transitions to help your writing flow like a waterfall. Transitions help with organization, word choice, and sentence fluency.
Addition
again, also, besides, equally important, finally, first, further, furthermore, in addition, in the first place, last, lastly, moreover, next, second, still
Comparison
also, in the same way, likewise, similarly
Concession
granted, naturally, of course
Contrast
although, at the same time, despite, even so, even though, for all that, however, in contrast, in spite of, instead, nevertheless, notwithstanding, on the contrary, on the other hand, otherwise, regardless, still, though, with that being said
Emphasis
certainly, indeed, in fact, of course
Example or Illustration
after all, as an illustration, even, for example, for instance, in conclusion, indeed, in fact, in other words, in short, it is true, of course, namely, specifically, that is, to illustrate, thus, truly
Summary
all in all, altogether, as has been said, finally, in brief, in conclusion, in other words, in particular, in short, in simpler terms, in summary, on the whole, that is, therefore, to put it differently, to summarize
Time Sequence
after a while, afterward, again, also, as long as, at last, at length, at that time, before, besides, earlier, eventually, finally, formerly, further, furthermore, in addition, in the first place, in the past, last, lately, meanwhile, moreover, next, now, presently, second, shortly, simultaneously, since, so far, soon, still, subsequently, then, thereafter, until, until now, when
Using Transitions
Directions: On the blank line between each sentence below, write a transition that will correctly help the two sentences flow more smoothly. Use the list of transitions located to assist you.
1. George and Al disappeared into another room. ________________________, they emerged wearing clown costumes.
2. North Americans often serve hot chocolate with whipped cream. ______________________________, South Americans often add cinnamon and sometimes orange rind.
3. We waited endlessly for a package from home. ________________________, one arrived on the day we least expected it.
4. Not everyone did poorly on the exam. ______________________________, Janet scored over 90 percent.
5. My mother does not approve of dates on school nights. ______________________________, I will not be able to go to the hockey game with you next Wednesday.
6. The sunlight disappeared, and the sky darkened. ______________________________, large hailstones began to fall.
7. Ingrid Plotkin has been named vice president in charge of advertising for the Bradley Corporation. _________________________________, she was a copywriter and account executive.
8. You can plan to arrive early. __________________________________, I will be behind schedule if you don’t.
9. Maryanne had built several pieces of summer furniture. ______________________________, she built an awning for the outdoor deck.
10. Nesting birds use their body heat to keep their eggs warm.
______________________________, other animals like the kangaroos use their bodies to incubate their young.
11. Beyond a doubt, the security guard was frightened.
______________________________, he shook and trembled and could not lift his arm.
12. There are many ways to save money. ____________________________,
you can enroll in a payroll deduction plan where you work.
Argumentative Writing Terms to Know
Argument-
← A mode of writing intended to win the reader’s agreement. This is similar to persuasion, but it has __________________________________________. It’s goal is to _______________________________________ versus changing one’s point of you.
← Argument will require discussion, deliberation, inquiry, and ____________________________ to come up with a stronger resolution.
Bias-
← A personal preference or belief that one has. Someone may not give _________________________________________ to a different idea.
← A bias in an article or editorial may show one point of view, using selected facts and quotes to support that point of view and ___________________________________________ the opposing side.
Claim-
← This is another word for thesis or proposition. It answers the question:
← ____________________________________________________? or ____________________________________________________?
Counter Claim-
← The opposing position to the argument’s claim.
Evidence-
← The _____________________________________ for an argument. It is the proof that supports the claim.
← It may include personal experience, anecdotes, and facts.
← It should ____________________________________ and establishing credibility, and it should not include fallacies.
Reasoning-
← The art of using language effectively.
← In argumentative writing, we want to keep in mind the __________________________________________.
← Ethos (speaker) Logos (message) Pathos (audience) How do the words relate? _______________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
-----------------------
Remember to use CECs!
Hint: Comes before introduction
You should write ___ to ___ sentences in this paragraph.
You should write ___ to ___ sentences for the next three paragraphs.
You should write ___ to ___ sentences in this paragraph.
#
#
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