WRITING EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPHS
WRITING EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPHS
1. TOPIC SENTENCES
In a memo to the college president, the athletic director is arguing for a new stadium scoreboard. One paragraph will describe the old scoreboard and why it needs to be replaced. The following is a list of ideas for that paragraph:
1. The old scoreboard is a tired warhorse that was originally constructed in the 1906s.
2. It’s now hard to find replacement parts for it.
3. It shows scores only for football games.
4. Coca-Cola has offered to donate a new sports scoreboard in return for exclusive rights to sell soda pop on campus.
5. The old scoreboard should be replaced for many reasons.
6. When we have soccer games or track meets, we’re without any functioning scoreboard.
7. The old scoreboard is not energy efficient.
• Which sentence should be the topic sentence? _5__
• Which sentence(s) should be developed in a different paragraph? ____4_______
• Which sentences should follow the topic sentence and in what order? __1, 2, 3, 6, 7 (or 1, 2, 7, 3, 6)
2. COHERENCE
What does this mean?
Hold together
Three writing devices to help achieve coherence:
• Repeat key ideas or key words from a preceding sentence.
e.g.? “For the past six months, college administrators and Coca-Cola have been working on a deal in which the college would receive a new sports scoreboard. _The deal would involve exclusive rights to sell soda pop on the 12,000 student campus.
• Use pronouns that clearly refer to their antecedents.
e.g. How could you improve the following?
“The Coca-Cola Company requires an exclusive contract committing the college for ten years without any provision preventing a price increase. This could be very costly to students, staff, and faculty.”
Insert contract here
• Use Transitional and Connective Words and Expressions
These indicate where the message is going and help the reader anticipate what is coming.
Transitionals
|although |furthermore |moreover |
|as a result |hence |nevertheless |
|consequently |however |of course |
|for example |in addition |on the other hand |
|for this reason |in this way |therefore |
Connectives
|first |second |finally |
|after |meanwhile |next |
|after all |instead |specifically |
|thus |also |likewise |
|as |as if | |
Version 1:
“The old sports scoreboard should be replaced for many reasons. It is a tired warhorse that was originally constructed in the 1960s. It’s now hard to find replacement parts for it when something breaks. In addition, the old scoreboard is not energy efficient. Finally, the old scoreboard shows scores only for football games. Consequently, when we have soccer games or track meets, we’re without any functioning scoreboard.
Version 2.
“The old sports scoreboard should be replaced for many reasons. First, it is a tired warhorse that was originally constructed in the 1960s. Consequently, it’s now hard to find replacement parts for it when something breaks. Second, the old scoreboard is not energy efficient. Finally, the old scoreboard (or it) shows scores only for football games. As a result, when we have soccer games or track meets, we’re without any functioning scoreboard.
3. EXPRESS SIMILAR IDEAS WITH SIMILAR GRAMMATICAL CONSTRUCTION (PARALLELISM)
To provide flow to your writing, words or ideas that share the same logical role in a sentence should be presented in the same grammatical form. This is especially true in lists or series of three or more items.
e.g. ”The following suggestions can help employers avoid bias in job interviews:
1. Base questions on the job description.
2. Questioning techniques.
3. Selection and training of interviewers.
Revised:
e.g. ”The following suggestions can help employers avoid bias in job interviews:
1. Base questions on the job description.
2. Ask the same questions of all applicants.
3. Select and train interviewers.
Revise the following sentence:
“Your job is to research, design, and the implementation of a diversity program.”
“Your job is to research, design, and to implement …” OR
“Your job includes researching, designing, and implementing …”
“Your job includes research, design, and implementation of …
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