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Personality Profile PaperCNS 770Jacquelyn ArcellanaFebruary 9, 2016Myers-Briggs Personality TypeMy Myers-Briggs temperament type is Extroverted Intuitive Thinking Judging (ENTJ). The Extraversion domain was very clear with a preference clarity index (PCI) of 28. This strong preference for extraversion was not surprising because I have always preferred to “focus on the outer world of people and things.” My preference for the Intuitive domain was also very strong with a PCI of 23. I like to focus on parts of information that are not obvious to others, which enables me to see things for what they could be and not just for what they are. Despite this propensity to generate endless possibilities in my mind, I lack the ability to follow through. My preference for the Thinking domain was weak with a PCI of 4. I agree with the weak score in this domain because I feel that I could go either way depending on the situation. While I appreciate logic and objective analysis, I also appreciate subjective experience. Others generally view me as “blunt” and maybe even a little “cold” at times, but I feel confident in my ability to interchange the two as needed. For example, when I managed a restaurant, I had to use the “Thinking” aspect of my temperament to ensure that whatever decision I made was in the best interest of the company. As a counselor, I’m more inclined to use the “Sensing” aspect of my temperament because my goal is to stay in the here and now with the client. My preference for the Judging domain was slightly higher with a PCI of 9. The contradiction in this domain is going to be a consistent theme throughout this paper because while I do prefer a “planned and organized approach to life,” I am not able to live up to this ideal very often. I attribute this to my inclination for spontaneity and flexibility, which I feel are the direct result of having both ADHD and poor follow through. This constant battle between my need for control and my desire for spontaneity leave me feeling anxious and miserable. How do you satisfy both aspects of yourself when it can only be one way or the other? Furthermore, how do you avoid confusing your friends, spouse, children, etc. when you flip flop between both extremes? Despite these inconsistencies, I fit the ENTJ type very well. I have always been a leader and while I try to be mindful of my tendency to take charge, I inevitably wind up in that position. I was teaching school to children in the bed of my grandfather’s truck when I was 5 years old at my brothers soccer practice, I created a club for my neighborhood complete with paperwork and an official newsletter in elementary school, I was elected the president of my 5th grade class, and so on. I have challenged authority on numerous occasions and continue to do so because I feel that the only way to make change happen is to say something. While I might overstep my boundaries at times, I consider my willingness to speak out and stand up for what I believe in to be one of my best assets. Enneagram Personality TypeMy dominant personality type is Seven, the “Enthusiast” and my wing type is Eight, the “Challenger.” Sevens are noted to be “the most enthusiastic, extroverted, and outgoing type of the Enneagram.” They seek variety and constant experience and have a tendency to possess multiple talents, but no expertise. Healthy Sevens are able to harness their many gifts because they are able to keep their feet on the ground and work within certain constraints. Unhealthy Sevens tend to get lost in plans and never manage to complete what they start. Average Sevens get so overwhelmed by the plethora of possibilities that they lose a sense of priority and throw themselves into endless busyness. This constant whirlwind of aimless activities leaves the Seven feeling unproductive and most importantly unsatisfied. The average Seven will lose focus while trying to escape their inner anxiety. Loss of focus leads to a loss of energy which ultimately leads to unrealized talents and potential. Enneagram Eights “are motivated by the need to feel self-reliant and strong and avoid feeling weak or dependent.” At their best, Twos are direct, authoritative, energetic, and loyal; however, at their worst, they are controlling, rebellious, insensitive, and domineering. Twos want recognition for their contributions, but they despise flattery. They have a tendency to put too much pressure on themselves and have a hard time dealing with situations when things don’t go as planned. “Women Eights sometimes have a hard time in our society because their strength and boldness are considered masculine traits.” As parents, they can be over-protective at times, but are also known to be tough, controlling, and rigid. The inability to correct perceived injustice causes a great deal of stress for Eights. They focus on helping the weak and innocent in an attempt to obscure their own vulnerabilities. While Sevens like me always appear to be happy and fun loving on the outside, I experience a great deal of anxiety on the inside. I am impulsive, avoidant, unfocused, undisciplined, and restless. My avoidant behavior leads to increased anxiety which leads to obsessive thinking which leads to INSANITY! This has become more and more of an issue as I have gotten older and I attribute this increased anxiety to my desire for complacency. My care free personality was ideal when I was a child because I didn’t have to deal with my responsibilities. As an adult, failure to accept and deal with my responsibilities has led to a great deal of stress. When this happens, I find myself dumbfounded and instead of trying to refocus on what I can accomplish, I just keep adding more and more to the chaos. I spent more sessions than I want to admit regurgitating my hatred for the concept of time with my therapist years ago. I would plan my weekends to the minute in an effort to avoid idle time and literally had a “fear” of having nothing to do. Only now have I attributed this to my desire to avoid all pain and suffering. I guess I felt that staying busy meant never having to deal with reality. I was surprised to see Five listed as my second highest score because while I relate to certain characteristics of the “Investigator,” I wouldn’t have expected such a high score. What I found interesting was that when a Seven moves to the positive side of Five they become quieter, more objective, and place more value on wisdom and self-discipline. Is it possible that my score for Five is more of a reflection of my attempt to become a mature and responsible adult and maybe not a true reflection of my innate personality? I say this because the Enneagram identifies an extension from Seven to the positive side of Five as “growth.” My third highest score was One or the “Reformer.” Again, I was surprised about this score, but this time it’s because I thought it would be higher. I was diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) in my early twenties. I sought out treatment from a therapist because I was experiencing a great deal of anxiety in my everyday life. My husband had just left for deployment and while I had been a single mother before I married him – in that moment, I felt like the weight of the world was on my shoulders. I had never experienced such anxiety in my life and now that I have sat down and analyzed my personality for this paper, I see that “breakdown” differently. The line that extends from Seven to One indicates “stress” which explains why I resorted to obsessive compulsive thinking and behaviors during that time. Interesting enough, my therapist at the time said that my sudden need for order and control was my unconscious attempt to control the chaos that was my mind. If I couldn’t control what was going on internally, at least I could control those things that were external to me. The downside is that this incessant need for control and order has now been engrained into my psyche and to make matters worse – I’m not very good at it. I identify with my fairly well developed Eight wing because I am very independent and my biggest fear is not being in control. I am a perfectionist and I am VERY critical of myself. Sometimes this spills over into my relationships, specifically with my daughter, but I am learning to lower the expectations I place on other people. Eights also prefer to stay at a safe emotional distance from others, which is something that has affected most of my relationships. It’s very difficult for me to express emotion and to expose my feelings, but on the flipside I am a very emotional person. I actually consider myself to be overly empathetic. At times, I feel like I take on the hurt and pain of other people so much more that most people do, but again, it’s the outward display of emotion that I avoid. Based on what I’ve read, I guess this could just be my way of avoiding humiliation for having such strong and intense emotions. NEO-PI Personality DomainAccording to the NEO-PI, I exhibit a very high level of Neuroticism, meaning I am “prone to irrational ideas, less able to control my impulses, and generally cope poorly with stress.” I also exhibit a very high level of Openness to Experience, which suggests that I “have an active imagination, prefer variety, willing to question authority, and have an intellectual curiosity.” My level of Extraversion is average, which implies that I am generally “sociable, like people, prefer large groups and gatherings” but I also value independence and have moments where I prefer to be alone. I exhibit a very low level of Agreeableness, meaning that I’m “typically disagreeable or antagonistic, egocentric, skeptical of others’ intentions, and competitive rather than cooperative.” My level of Conscientiousness is moderately high, which suggests that I am “purposeful, strong-willed, and determined.”I scored on a higher level for Neuroticism (T=67), which I’m ashamed to admit is pretty accurate. Impulsivity is my highest score and I attribute that to my ADHD. I feel extremely insecure of myself as an adult because I have a hard time waiting my turn to speak, I talk too much, and listening to someone else speak can be a chore. While these are all simple things for other people, I have to remain cognizant of them all day every day. In an effort to subdue my tendencies, I have become isolated and anxious. Therefore, the higher levels of anxiety, angry hostility, depression, self-consciousness, and vulnerability all stem from this lack of control I have over my own behaviors.My score was close to the median level for Extraversion (T=52), which is a little low compared to my results on the MBTI, but the inclusion of warmth and positive emotions in this domain lowered my overall score. As mentioned before, I am assertive, active, and overly talkative. I enjoy stimulation and excitement, but I don’t consider myself to have a cheerful disposition. I actually don’t consider myself to have a negative disposition either, but I had a low score for Positive Emotions (T=30). However, this doesn’t mean that I’m unhappy, just that I’m not as enthusiastic or animated as other people. My score for Openness to Experience was on a higher level (T=69), which I feel is a pretty accurate reflection. My Feelings score was pretty high (T=72) which is consistent with my results of the Enneagram. I mentioned that while I might come across as cold and emotionless to some people, I actually feel very deeply. The score for this facet solidifies this by suggesting that I “experience deeper and more differentiated emotional states and feel both happiness and unhappiness more keenly than others do.” The scores for fantasy, aesthetics, ideas, and values were pretty consistent with how I view myself, but I found the score for Actions (T=38) to be a little low. I guess it comes down to what it is that I prefer to keep consistent. I love spontaneity and doing things in the spur of the moment, but I also have pretty structured routines that I adhere to. For example, I eat the same thing for breakfast every day. If I deviate from this routine, the rest of my day feels off. I eat the same thing at every restaurant I go to every time. Why? Because if I deviate from what I know I like, there is a good chance I won’t like what I do order and then I’ll be disappointed that I didn’t get the same old thing. I scored slightly under the median level for Agreeableness (T=43), which was actually higher than I thought it would be. I have a tendency to be disagreeable and I have also been more of a competitive person my whole life, but I feel that I could be compliant if necessary. What’s interesting is that I consider myself altruistic because I am constantly trying to do anything and everything I can for other people at my own expense, but I never consider whether or not other people would be equally helpful in return – I guess I don’t expect it. I have a hard time accepting compliments and an even harder time accepting gifts (I HATE opening presents in front of people). I guess that ultimately stems from the insecurity I have regarding my inability to express emotion and behave appropriately, as discussed earlier. It now makes me question whether this median score for “trust” is a reflection of my lack of consideration for other people. Not that I don’t care about other people, but I generally fail to ask others what they want and or need from me. My level of Conscientiousness was slightly over the median range (T=55), which is a fairly accurate reflection. While I am very strong willed and love to plan and organize tasks, I’m not always punctual and reliable which is reflected by my low score for Self-Discipline (T=33). I procrastinate with everything. Sometimes it’s the only way I can find clarity. I will also wait until the last minute to drive to an appointment or arrive at the airport because I hate being early and having idle time because I can’t stand being bored. The downside is that in my effort to cherish every minute, I’m always late. Of course I have the same score for Deliberation because I if I thought more about the consequences of my actions, I would be less likely to procrastinate all the time. On the other end of the spectrum, I had a higher score for Achievement Striving (T=62). Individuals who score high in this facet generally invest too much in their careers and become workaholics and this is something that I can relate to. Of course, if the work I was doing was repetitive or unsatisfying, then I would be less inclined to bury myself in my job. However, if that were the case – I would just quit. Disordered Personality Traits I have a diagnosis of Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, so it’s no surprise that I fit the DSM-V criteria to establish the diagnosis; however, I do not meet the criteria for any of the other Cluster C personality disorders. I have a preoccupation with order, control, routine, and perfectionism. My desire to be the best at everything has been present since childhood, but this has significantly impacted all areas of functioning because no matter how hard I work or how good I am at something, I will never be good enough. I don’t like being told that I am talented or skilled at something because I always see room for improvement. I’m the type of person that creates an itinerary for my one week trip to Disney World, complete with a map of how we will walk around the park, the sequence of rides/shows, and where we will go to the bathroom, all so we can maximize our time. I have a really hard time completing any tasks because again – it’s never good enough. If I make one mistake while writing notes for this class, I will have to rip out the page and start all over again – even if I was almost to the bottom of the page. I don’t like that I require such perfection in my life because I know that I’m not perfect and that the notion of perfection is not attainable, but if I try to avoid these obsessive behaviors then I feel even more frustrated. I work too much and focus on school and work activities to the exclusion of leisure activities. This has been a source of great frustration this past year as my workload has increased with the addition of practicum and internship. I have a very strong moral code and feel that I have to obey all rules and laws because if I don’t then it somehow flags me as a hypocrite. For example, I will never leave my grocery cart in the parking lot, I will walk it to the area designated for carts or back inside not matter how far that is. I feel that if I fail to do this then it somehow justifies other people doing bad things to be. I guess I feel like you can’t be disappointed or upset by the actions of others if you engage in the same behaviors. I am very rigid and stubborn and I like everything to follow an established routine so that I can maintain order. As I mentioned earlier, I am also somewhat spontaneous, but this has declined as I have become more rigid and inflexible with age. I am unable to delegate tasks to other people out of fear that they won’t do the job correctly or up to my standards. I have come to accept more responsibility than I can ever possibly handle to save myself from feeling disappointed about anyone. I have done this a lot with my ten year old daughter and I continue to struggle with fixing this because I make her dependent on me by not allowing her the opportunity to make mistakes. The only two criteria that I do not meet involve hoarding objects and money. I have no problem discarding things before they should even be discarded and while I have a sense of responsibility with money, I am not miserly.Personality Profile Summary Overall, I am generally extroverted, preferring to stay busy with constant human interaction. Despite this desire for human interaction, I will – at times – retreat to my room and sit in dark solitude for a few hours. This is usually necessary when I have been exposed to fairly intense sensory stimuli. It’s probably because I focus on so many different things that it causes me to have “sensory overload.” Once I rejuvenate, I’m ready to head back out and resume my activities. I’m fairly intuitive in the way I take in information, which probably contributes to my creativity and constant influx of ideas. One of my biggest problems is sifting through all of my ideas and staying focused on completing the task at hand before dropping everything for another exciting project. In the end, my life is filled with a million partial projects and nothing to show for all of my hard work. I am a thinker and while I relish logic and objective analysis, I also like to have the ability to test the limits and create new ways of doing things, especially if the current system doesn’t work. This is probably why I scored on the lower end for thinking and suggests that there’s a part of me that makes decision by considering the subjective nature of the situation and people involved. I tend to focus more on order, control, and routine that I should, but this is possibly more of a defense mechanism that I use to control my anxiety. On the other hand, I am impulsive and spontaneous, which contradicts my very nature to maintain order and control. I have struggled with this contradiction for the past eleven years and often wish I could go back to be being as na?ve about my shortcomings as I was when I was a child. I have a diagnosis of OCPD which has significantly impacted my relationship with my husband and daughter at times. I struggle with task completion because I spend so much time obsessing about getting things perfect that I often fail to finish anything. I have an extremely hard time trusting other people which has caused me to take on more than my fair share of responsibilities at home and work. My response to this overload is an increase in stress and resentment towards other people for not helping more. This is contradictive though because I NEVER ask for help out of fear that things won’t be done the right way (i.e. my way). So, instead of accepting help, I put all of the pressure on myself to accomplish everything. This in turn leads to tasks that never get completed which in turn leads to feelings of inadequacy and failure. Impacts on Personal and Professional Relationships Through my work in this program, I have learned to let go and listen more. Listening to other people, showing compassion, and focusing myself outward have been a struggle, but I have found my work as a counselor helpful in this regard. I used to joke about the fact that I would one day find myself in a session with a client and actually be expected to “listen.” While these negative aspects of myself have long been a part of my life, I have been able to use my training as a counselor to alleviate some of their hold on me. Even if I never worked as a counselor after graduation, I have learned important communication skills in this program that not only apply to my professional work, but my personal life as well. While I have made significant improvements in how I relate to and interact with other people since starting this program, my relationship with my husband wasn’t always easy. The first few years of our marriage were difficult because he felt like I never listened to him and I didn’t think I was doing anything wrong. Over time, we have learned to communicate about these behaviors and he has learned that I’m not intentionally discounting what he’s saying, but it still bothers him nonetheless. This has also affected my relationships with friends and potential friends, especially as an adult. I don’t recall these behaviors to be so significant when I was younger, but they certainly make me feel inferior as an adult. I did have trouble expressing my emotions as a child and I can recall the uneasiness I felt when my friends started hugging each other in middle school. Something as simple as a hug was very anxiety provoking for me because I avoided touch and words like “I love you” at all costs. There was no easy way for me to engage in such a common gesture because it was awkward and everybody would have probably seen the discomfort on my face if I were to ever do it. I still prefer a more controlled expression of emotion (except with my daughter) in all situations, which based on this assessment is a reflection of my inability to trust and be vulnerable. This fear of being exposed has led to a lot of problems in my romantic relationships and in my marriage. I have overcome a lot of my insecurities over the years, but I had an extremely hard time getting close to anyone until I was an adult. This desire for control that I have isn’t healthy and it has affected my relationships as well as my performance at work and school. I set very high standards for myself and sometimes this expands to other people. I try very hard to make sure that my rigid expectations are aimed only at myself, but it’s difficult to contain them at times, especially when I’m expected to work as a team. I work long hours, never take my breaks, and have to force to take a bathroom break. I require order in my homes. I hate deviating from routine and when my husband does something out of order it makes me angry. I have to constantly remind myself to let go and move on, but this is something that I continue to struggle with. This has come into play once or twice during my practicum/internship so far, but I don’t suspect that it will be a problem in my work with clients. I have a fairly good grasp of who I am and what I have to bring to the table and what I need to leave at the door. I don’t project having any problems listening, controlling, or minimizing my clients’ needs. As I’ve mentioned before, my work as a counselor is mutually beneficial because I am a continuous work in progress that will benefit from my work with other people. I can’t foresee any situations and or client backgrounds/experiences that would lead to problems with transference or counter transference for me. I have been fortunate enough to not suffer any significant traumas or losses in my life and while I can be very empathetic and supportive, I am also very capable of detaching myself when necessary. This is where the upside of my objective nature suits me because it should make remaining professional in most situations an easier feat. Conception of Personality I see personality as a subjective explanation for one’s behavior, thoughts, feelings, and predispositions. The answers and explanations provided by such an assessment could be a valuable tool for a lot of clients, but there will always be those people that see their results as finite. All three personality assessments share many of the same characteristics, but none of them are absolute. Each assessment has parameters that restrict its results to nothing more than a general consensus of what defines a personality as opposed to an exact science. Out of all three test, I felt that the Enneagram provided the most compatible results for me. I also appreciate the tests concept of personality existing on a continuum of development. For me, I would have scored differently five years ago and even more so ten years ago. While my overall outcome might still be very similar, there are certain aspects of my personality that change with time, age, and experience. The use of the DSM-V to diagnose personality disorders based on a set of criteria can be both useful and harmful depending on the client and their perception of the diagnosis. I had no clue what OCPD was when I was diagnosed. For some people, receiving a diagnosis can merely serve to satisfy their desire to have a name and validation for their symptoms. For others, it can causes a great deal of anxiety and insecurity because they view it as proof that they are inadequate. Overall, the DSM-V is a useful tool for establishing consistent guidelines for ensuring proper diagnosis and treatment of all personality disorders. Reflections I think it is very important to humble ourselves as counselors and remain open to constructive criticism and feedback about both our skills and our shortcomings. I like to assess my client’s perceptions of me and our work together throughout the therapeutic process because it has been a useful tool for building rapport and gaging where I stand with a client. Towards the end of practicum, the director at my site asked all of the guys in our power group to give me a grade with an explanation. I’m not going to lie, having to sit and listen to 20+ men tell you what they liked and didn’t like about your approach was very intimidating, but it was also very humbling. Listening to feedback is not difficult for me because part of healthy communication is asking for feedback, especially for the Seven in me. However, the feedback that I get only helps me grow and become a better counselor. This assignment was very difficult and the Seven in me tried to avoid the pain and frustration of completing this in depth analysis (hence being two days late) because having to face the reality of who I am – both positive and negative – can be a difficult pill to swallow. Some of the scores showed certain aspects of myself that I would prefer other people to not see, such as my low scores in agreeableness, positive emotions, and self-discipline and my high scores in impulsivity, anxiety, depression, and anger hostility. My husband’s reaction to the self- assessment of my personality was consistent with my own. We talk about these things often and I think we both have a pretty good idea of who we are – the good, the bad, and the ugly. Therefore, there wasn’t anything in this summary that we haven’t already addressed and confronted at some point in our marriage. Despite the reality of who I am, I know that most aspects of my assessment can be altered to better suit who I want to be if I truly desire to change the negative aspects of myself. Written Assignment RubricPoor0 - 17%Fair18-22%Good23-27%Excellent28-30% PurposeThe purpose and focus of the writing are not clear to the reader. The writer’s decisions about focus, organization, style, and content sometimes interfere with the purpose of the writing. The writer has made good decisions about focus, organization, style, and content so as to achieve the purpose of the writing. The writer’s decision about focus, organization, style, and content fully elucidate the purpose and keep the purpose at the center of the writing.Poor0 - 24%Fair25-30%Good31-36%Excellent37-40%Development of IdeasMost ideas unsupported, confusion between personal and external evidence, reasoning flawed. Presents ideas in general terms, support for ideas is inconsistent, some distinctions need clarification, reasoning unclear. Supports most ideas with effective examples, references, and details, makes key distinctions. Explores ideas vigorously, supports points fully using a balance of subjective and objective evidence, makes useful distinctions.Poor0 - 5%Fair6-7%Good8-9%Excellent10%ReferencesReferences few in number or lacking in quality.Less than desired number of references.Adequate number of references with most sufficient in quality.Adequate number of high quality references, evaluated, synthesized and used appropriately.Poor0 – 2%Fair3%Good4%Excellent 5%LanguageEmploys words that are unclear, sentence structures inadequate for clarity. Errors are seriously distracting. Word forms and sentence structures are adequate to convey basic meaning. Errors cause noticeable distraction. Word forms are correct, sentence structure is effective. Presence of a few errors is not distracting.Employs words with fluency, develops concise standard English sentences, and balances a variety of sentence structures effectively. Poor0 - 2%Fair3%Good4%Excellent5%Logic & OrganizationDoes not develop ideas cogently, uneven and ineffective overall organization. Unclear introduction or conclusion. Develops and organizes ideas in paragraphs that are not necessarily connected. Some overall organization, but some ideas seem illogical and/or unrelated. Unfocused introduction or conclusion. Develops unified and coherent ideas within paragraphs with generally adequate transitions; clear overall organization relating most ideas together.Good introduction and conclusion. Little digression.Develops ideas cogently, organizes them logically with paragraphs and connects them with effective transitions. Clear and specific introduction and conclusion. Poor0 – 2%Fair3%Good4%Excellent5%Spelling and GrammarWriting contains numerous errors in spelling and grammar which interfere with comprehension. Frequent errors in spelling and grammar distract the reader. While there may be minor errors, the writing follows normal conventions of spelling and grammar throughout and has been carefully proofread. The writing is essential error-free in terms of spelling and grammar. Poor0 - 2%Fair3%Good4%Excellent5%Adherence to APA StyleLittle or no attempt to follow APA. Major errors.Some attempt to follow APA guidelines with minor errors.APA guidelines followed with very few minor errors.APA guidelines ments:Purpose26/30Development of Ideas37/40References5/10Language5/5Logic & Organization5/5Spelling & Grammar5/5Adherence to APA Style4/5Total Percentage92/100TOTAL POINTS:218/250 ................
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