You & I



Maybe Love Is All We Need

Maybe love is all there is

After we have quested our fears

And dimmed our egos

Let go of foolish pride

And the past

Maybe love is all that matters

Caring for someone or something

Just a little bit more than myself

It brings me an inner warmth

A glow of peace

Maybe love is all we ever have

To quest the nighttime demons

To banish them back to their own hell

In the severe quietness of being alone

We can be just okay

Maybe love is the answer

To all the prayers of help me, save me

It is lying right in front of us

Like a flower waiting to be kissed by the sun

To blossom, to bloom, to grow

Maybe love is all we need

Quiet

It is quiet here

Like being on a ship on the calmness of the ocean

So quiet that you can hear

You own heartbeat

So quiet that your thoughts

Have tune and space to breathe

To grow into themselves

To grow into you

My feelings float by, slowly

So I can watch and observe them

See them rise and fall like the ocean

Fade to the greenness of the forest

There is a freedom in the quiet

Once torn down by resistance

To take off my mesh of busyness

Allow myself to be alive, to be free

There is sadness, too

And loneliness

But it too is fleeting

It rises and falls with the moon

Then disappears in the freshness of the morning

In the silence

In the solitude

In the quiet

Many Gifts

I love your softness in the hardness of my dreams

Your heat in times of brittle cold

I love your smile to greet the day

To melt my cold street heart

I love your quiet gentleness

As you delve beneath your latest book

To watch you travel many miles

And then come back to me

I love your thoughtful piercing look

As you seek the truth inside my words

You seek the best beneath the waves

As I struggle to the surface

I love your hope that we can be

Two partners on a lonely road

Two peas in pods against the wind

Believing we can be free

Longing

I long to see you sitting there curled up on my couch

With your magazines and cup of tea

I feel your love so much

I long to watch you tire as you struggle to just squeeze

The very last drops of pleasure

As you do just what you please

I long to hear you sigh and moan as you sink into your bath

The bubbles swirl around you

As you let the day go past

I long to see you lying there so happy in our bed

Your eyes are boldly open

And smiling in your head

I long to lift the covers and slide in close beside you

To feel your heat and sleepiness

As you read for me and I do too

I long to feel your tight embrace, your head upon my heart

Your fingers up and down my spine

What I miss when we’re great

I long to drift into my dreams with you there by my side

To love you and to hold you

In the magic of my mind

I Have Your Love

I feel like I have been living in a bubble of my emotions

A seething cauldron that sometimes boils over

But I have had your love to hold me

As my old life burns to ashes

And is blown away

I feel like I have been the resident of a locked ward

Held prisoner by my feelings of guilt and remorse

But I have your love to free me

As the bars fall away

And my chains are unshackled

I feel like I have been living in a house with many rooms

Some of which I have never visited before

But I have your love as my companion

As I sweep away the cobwebs

And open all the windows

I feel like I have been shipwrecked on a lonely island

Maybe the island of forgotten toys

But I have your love as a beacon of hope

As I swim my way to shore

And the safety of your arms

I Want You

Sometimes when you are near me, splendid and perfect in your nakedness

My hands start to tremble

My heartbeat pounds like an African drum

I lose sight of everything

Except your beauty

 

Sometimes when your heat presses against mine in the coolness of the night

My body jumps with electricity

My mouth and throat are parched

My ears hear only your breath

And I am grateful

 

Sometimes when I watch you lie restfully on my couch it is all I can do

To stop myself from falling before you

My hands running hot over you

My lips barely touching the back of your neck

My world is consumed

And I want you

Just Being You

The grayness of the morning does not dampen my smile

My enthusiasm is alive and growing

I am borne on the wind like a single yellow leaf

Returning to its home near the river.

 

Some think the earth is dying as the trees lessen their burdens

But I see it as composting for their souls

As they free their children to the sky

They can rest and enjoy their peaceful rewards

 

I am grateful to be alive and to be in love

To be loved just for who I am, not who I may become

To love another and give of myself

Is a fabulous reason to get up in the morning

 

I hope that you can still see the sunlight through the clouds

Still feel the warm southern breeze in your hair

Find that spark of joy in your heart

And reward yourself for just being you

Missing

I will allow myself to feel the absence

Miss the song with my heart

Miss the silent, simple pleasures

That are not here when we’re apart

I will allow myself to feel the sadness

Even as the tears do fall

Cleansing one just like the land

While I’m waiting for your call

I will allow myself to feel the pain

That stretches deep within my soul

A thousand cuts will not betray me

As I’m seeking to be whole

I will allow myself to love you always

Even though you’re miles away

Feel your touch, you walk beside me

Through endless nights and longest days

Grateful

I am grateful for your gentle touch

Your hand upon my heart

I am grateful for our time together

Especially when we are apart

I am grateful for your quiet spirit

Shining from the stars

I am grateful for your inner vision

Showing who you are

I am grateful for your constant kindness

Even in the face of pain

I am grateful for your hidden beauty

That shows up time, again

I am grateful for the gifts you offer

Without expecting in return

I am grateful for the love you proffer

As time goes by and seasons turn

I see you, Joan Riggs

Meditation

The first wave of feelings that floated out from behind my eyeballs

Were soft pink puffs of gratitude

And a wave of forgiveness

Unexpected, unsought

And certainly unearned

The second wave was more severe

Loneliness and missing and fear

Darkened my vision and blurred my eyes

To the truth

To reality

To what I could be

But as I sat in the sadness beside my tears

The gratitude came back like an echo

Forgiveness as a reverberation

Closer to my heart

Closer to where I am and where I am going

I do not want to get lost behind the waterfall

Even though it is safe and dry

I do not want to get lost in the music or chanting

Even though it brings me peace

I do not want to get list in just one moment

When I have a life of love ahead of me

Just Like You

The morning sun will never betray me

Its loyalty is eternal

It rises, even in the rain

More faithful than forever

It reminds me of you

The midnight moon will never betray me

It peeks in my window

Sleeps in my bed

Even when storm clouds chase it away it always comes back

Just like you

The rolling ocean will never betray me

Its deep waters cool me

It creeps closer at night, breaks away in the morning

I sleep in its waves and it comforts me

Just like you

Morning Call

I can feel the joy in your voice in the morning

Like a meadowlark sings to their lover

Like water touching down the quiet mountain side

It brings me peace and severity

It also brings me the intense sadness of missing you

I would gladly die at this moment for one touch

One caress upon your cheek

One brief flash of my hand behind your head, one kiss

I can feel the love in your voice in the morning

Deep held, close to the heart

Yet as free as the hawk circling the earth

Watching over me, loving me from a distance

It brings you to my present, my reality

Seeping in through every pore

I feel your arms around me, cradling me

Holding me as the tears rise, fall and fade

The Light of Love

I sit in the sadness of missing you

Aching from your absence

All my will turns slowly but powerfully toward you

I choose to be a spider in your web of love

I feel you with me, sitting beside me

In the long pauses between my words

In the wind that rustles the trees and chases clouds away

In the darkness of the night before dawn

I know that you have loved me forever

Before we met, before this life time

Before the mountains rose or the waters flowed

Before there was light in the darkness

I am humbled by your love

In awe of your capacity to continue

To preserve, to forgive in the face of deathly peril

To your own safety and sanity

I am committed to this love

No rabbits running, no sudden storms

No crises, real or perceived

No fears shall consume me or anxiety shake me from this love

For I have seen the mighty oak of love

Reflected in your eyes

I will clasp my arms around it and your only love

Until the light returns

With You

I sleep with you on the long full moon nights

While the fireflies dance with the fairies

I hold you so tight as the stars sparkle dust

And the wind carries off all my worries

I sing with you softly in the first light of dawn

As the mist melts away in the sun

I open my arms like the face of a rose

Still grateful a new day’s begun

I walk beside you on the highway of life

As the sun brings a world of new light

The birds fly alive in a blanket of love

And the moon says goodbye to the night

I long for you deeply as the fading sun sets

But the warmth that I feel is alive

I leave you in peace in the presence of God

And open my heart to the skies

One Grain of Sand

In a great ocean two tiny fishes can swim in anonymity

Unseen and unnoticed by the great wash of water

And yet for these two the world is as small as they can see

When they venture out into the vast expense

They know that at least one other

Will watch out for them

Will hold them in the darkness

Will dry their eyes when they cry

One the widest beach two grains of sand

Can sit quietly, alone

Apart from the billions of others

Yet together as one

When they look out at the desert in front of them

They know that at least one other

Will keep them safe from danger

Will shelter them in a stone

Will always love them

I will be your tiny fish and your one grain of sand

You & I

I am all storm and thunder

Without the excitement and fun of lightening

You are the only blue patch of sky

In the darkness of my loneliness

I am a walking, talking neurosis

All drama with little conviction

You are a tall, proud woman

Who walks in her own dream

I am one drunk away from an all-time loser

My hands shaking in the morning, my heart trembling at night

You are the rumour of kindness

As you struggle violently to be free

I am little more than intention

The pushover of my pride and ego

You are my tall, cool grass

Where I can sleep in peace

Perfect

I am perfect as I am

Without any need for my ego to create a great story

I am perfect as I am

From the first point that God gives me one long breath

To begin my day

You are perfect as you are

Without any need to do or think or act

You are perfect as you are

From your earliest days as first born

You are an angel, a gift from heaven

We are perfect as we are

Divine creations in human born

Our only need is to live and be loved

Our only weakness is our fears

Our only limits are those we place on ourselves

We are perfect flowers

Waiting to unfold in the warmth of the sun

Wherever

So many places, points of light

Where you and I can be at peace

So many times and tides have turned

Where we have found release

A sandy beach beneath the sun

A quiet night of beans and toast

Under the coverlet of fog

Along the water by the coast

In cold and damp and multitudes

Burned in a sea of yellow

On silent walks on moonless nights

Our fears grow soft and mellow

No matter where or how or when

On land or sea or distant isle

Alone together we will be

Until our love does die

Love in the Morning

Words are unwanted and unnecessary is the solitude of the morning

Thoughts run free like a trout that slides through the still waters

Only myself and my Creator exist here

My heart is a channel for this reflection

I would much rather have a smile than a good morning to welcome my day

To feel the love of another person

Without having yet done anything to meet this great gift

It is an unmerited blessing that I have still to earn

To have someone hold you in the darkness of the quiet morning

With only the world and small songbirds as our witness

Is proof of a great love

Even to a weak Doubting Thomas as myself

Who never believed he was worthy

Today I accept that gift

With a full heart and clear conscience

My only responsibility is to reciprocate in kind

To give freely of myself and my being

So that I can continue to receive these blessings

Today, tomorrow and forever

Peace of Mind

I am grateful for the peace of mind that comes when I'm with you

Your soft and gentle nature like the sun comes shining through

Whenever rainfall threatens or my world does come apart

I think of you and all you are and I feel you near my heart.

Still Sleeping

We watched as steam rose in great bursts

Like balloons at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade

The still green grass was covered by a layer of white like icing on a cake

The morning crept into the darkness and stole a kiss

While you were still sleeping

The Pieces of Me

My parents are my legs

They helped me to grow from helplessness

To a walking, talking, sentient human being

Able to decide my own future

 

My children are my arms

They help me to reach out to the world

I will breathe in them and through them

Long after I can speak

 

You are my heart, my aorta

The current of my life flows through you

It circulates around my body

And returns in love to you

True Love

True love is like the last leaf that clings to the branch even as the arctic winds shake it to its core

It stands alone, unafraid of the darkness of despair, or the haughty laughter of pride and ego

It swims to the surface even with cement blocks around its ankles and sorrow in its heart

It is like an elephant

It never forgets

Nor stoops to beg

Except for forgiveness

True love could be the only star at night, or at least the only one who does not hide from the night

It shines foreverly, like the Brothers, like Peggy Sue, or all the Whos in Whoville

Who have discovered that love comes just the same

Whether you are young and uninspired

Old and wrinkled

Prematurely cognoscente

Or completely unaware

It comes because you are here

Waiting

True love will last through the storms that rage like Ivan the Terrible or Katrina

Swamping New Orleans and driving grown men to tears

On their knees

Begging for relief, or just an end

To the pain

Of being alone

True love means that you are never alone

For it lives within you

Breathes your air and gives you hope

Like today, like the darkness, like the last leaf

Forever

Blessed by Morning Rain

Blessed by the first breath of the morning

Kissed by the rain

Somehow closer for reclamation

I am reborn again

Not by a burning bush

Not by a flash of light

But by the love that’s in your eyes

I am restored to sight

Even on the grayest day

Behind the clouds the sun does rise

Beneath the gloom my spirit soars

My heart has come alive

Just for today I have the chance

To live and love again

Just for today I have the gift

To be blessed by morning rain

A Second Chance

I am grateful for a second chance

New beginnings, a fresh start

My past is now behind me

My soul’s not torn apart

I am grateful to creation

For the courage and the grace

I am grateful to be willing

To show the moon my face

I am grateful to not be alone

To have you by my side

Like the glue that sticks together

We stand up and never hide

I am grateful to be granted

All this peace, just for today

For your honesty and laughter

By your thoughts and what you say

I am grateful to this moment

When the earth is all at ease

What I wish for I’ve been granted

What I want is what I need

Sometimes

Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly

I learn to feel the pain

Sometimes softly, sometimes harshly

I learn to love again

Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly

Old memories return

Sometimes pleasant, sometimes awful

Nowhere left to turn

Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly

I learn to be a better man

Sometimes easy, sometimes hard

I accept just who I am

Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly

The promises come true

Sometimes sooner, sometimes later

I learn to accept you

Choices

Today I feel like I’m in the right place

At the right time

Another door to my future has opened

Waiting for me to walk through

I can see a path through the forest of trees

Narrow but quite comfortable

For one

Or two

To follow

Along the way there may be distractions and calls to stop

Maybe we’ll take a different direction

But they are like the loons calls at night

False witnesses to today

I can see you with me

As we stop to pick wild blueberries

See the beauty of creation

Beside us

And within our hears

I have chosen life

Or maybe it has rechosen me

If I’m to partake of all its gifts

I must be clear-eyed and clear hearted

I chose to walk with you

Rebirth

Safe inside the blues of dreams

The past once more is present

The walls resound with shorts of joy

To live again once more

The long tall grass now shorn to ground

Wild roses struggle to rebound

Warm beneath the quilts of old

To live again once more

Small touches of the love within

Like trim around the walls of white

A staircase itched with tenderness

To live again once more

Sometimes when dark and silence falls

You hear the whispers of the night

To tell us that it’s just all right

To live again once more

Grateful

I am grateful that the morning sun awoke us from our sleep

Grateful that the stars went home

And in the sky the sun does creep

 

I am grateful when the noontime comes

And the earth is all afire

It makes me think of our great love, our passion and desire

 

I am grateful to the rain that falls

To give me time to think and pause

To give me pleasant memories of lying in your arms

 

But most of all I'm grateful when the sun sets in the west

The day is done, apart no more

We can lay in love and rest

Why

Why have I sought to spurn your gifts?

To reach for castles in the sky

Why have I chosen different paths?

Instead of lying safely

Within your arms of love

I do not know the answers yet to many of these questions

Perhaps my word was far too deep

Perhaps my mind was cloudy

Perhaps I could not realize

That all I sought was here

Today I strive for honesty

To live that truth inside of me

Today I work for willingness

To see the gifts you offer

Today I stretch my heart so wide

To be open to your love

I still do not know anymore

To help me answer all the why’s

The path that I must travel

Still bathed in fog and mist

But I know that on my journeys

I will have your love beside me

To hold me in the darkness

Until the road is clear

Open

Where have I been living all of this time?

So many days have been lost to pain

So many nights I’d rather forget

Then love to relive then again

I once built a great castle with walls and a moat

With towers of birch and guards at the door

I once built a great fortress to keep people out

To live there alone with my pain evermore

But now as the thunder peals roll in the night

The walls of my castle are crumbling to ground

And now as the lightening bolts crash in the sky

The birches of my fortress are falling around

I open my heart to the world and its power

I open my gates to the power above

I open my spurt to receive full grace

I open myself to the power of love

St. John’s

I walk sleeplessly through the streets of my youth

Crooked yellows, blues, reds and greens cling to the hillside

On the high levels where people ran like rabbits

To escape the famine, floods and fires

I lived one day at a time

One block was my horizon

Underneath the false promises of growth and development

The old city still beats a time to its own drummer

Some remember wistfully how it once was

Clutches of shoppers drawn to the water

Church squares the highest peaks

A man in white gloves leading them home

The spirit of the city still sleeps on the boardwalk

Hiding behind the blue containers

It laughs with the fog and cries with the rain and drizzle

Above it all the tower watches guard

A silent sentinel to a loving history

A quiet reverie for what once was

But can never be again

Messenger

It’s okay to cry

When it hurts so had that I can’t take it anymore

My tears release my pain

It’s as if the valve has been opened on a dam that just couldn’t hold back any longer

My tears mean that I am no longer alone

That I no longer have to suffer in silence

My tears are an SOS to my Higher Power

Send help quick, your child is in trouble

And he always responds

Sometimes he sends me a thought, a memory

A picture of someone I love

Sometimes he sends me an eagle to watch over me

Hold me in the darkness

Until the river subsides

And the waters recede

Sometimes he sends me one of His messengers

It could be someone I already know

Who will comfort me and love me

But sometimes it will be a stranger

Will you be my messenger?

Bathed in Green

The world before me bathed in green

And all the earth is still serene

Before the noise can deafen me

I want to send my love

The trees are bathed in sun’s first light

Their leaves a colour of delight

Some think that these are signs of death

But I believe it’s love

A gift from nature in the dawn

The river’s strong but silent song

Love swims beneath its waters deep

And waits for us to claim it

Angels

The thick fog was draped around your neck like a shawl

As you headed out into the unknown morning

Your fears waited patiently for you behind the bushes

But you were not surprised

Or frightened

 

Because you have a blanket of love and the protection of your three angels

That live inside of you to hold you tightly in the darkness

Give you courage

Give you hope

Grateful

I am grateful to the morning sun that seeps beyond the fog

I am grateful to just feel your heat beside me as I wake

I am grateful to just be alive again after so long in the dark

I am grateful to have another chance to be real and not a fake

 

I am grateful that so many people held me in their hearts

I am grateful that they did not give up when I strayed very far

I am grateful most of all for you, your wisdom through my pain

I am grateful to your everlove, my sweet and gentle star

Free

Something in the turbulent, ever-rolling ocean calms me

Maybe it is just eternity waiting for me

Or maybe it’s because I know that long after I’m gone

It will still be here

Blue and forever

I love to go to sleep with the whistle of the wind ringing in my ears

To hear the ocean rocking up against the shore

It lulls me to sleep and into its deepest dreams

Where I am called away

Where I am safe

I love waking in the morning with a blanket of fog to keep me warm

Soon the sun will chase it away like butter melting on toast

Leaving you and I to bask in the blueness of another day

Our love asks the ocean to let us be free

Thank you

Thank you for creating a safe place

Where I could just be me

With all my faults and frailties

With all of my judgment and self-loathing

You accepted the real me

Thank you for allowing me to share my inner most fears

And my greatest mistakes

Without judging or condemning me

You slowly and gently helped me learn to forgive myself

To love myself again

Thank you for letting me see the real you

Not just the person that you use to protect yourself

I know why you do that, I did it for years

And all I accomplished was getting hurt

Thank you for letting me see inside your spirit

Your pain and heartache

I see you as a child of God, loved by the universe

Thank you for saving my life

I love you

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