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Shrek OgRE

587 CELEBRITY ROAD | 800-256-8794 | BUILTTOPROTECT@

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Kanye West

Body Guard

Guard for Life

897 Beater Rd

Las Vegas California

Dear Kanye West:

We spoke on Wednesday afternoon and, as promised, I’m enclosing a copy of my resume. I am writing to you to go over again what we had talked about. I understand your current situation with the fans of Taylor Swift and what happened at the VMA’s. I am perfect for serving and protecting you in a way that no other body guard could.

For one, I tower over any person alive, and could beat any person who approached you to a pulp. I have guarded many princesses from their crazy stalkers and never once had any of them been put in harm’s way. Not only do I have strength, but also wit. Princess Fiona was being stalked by Charming and his mother, Fairy God mother. Without my keen sense of what was going on, Princess Fiona would have been put in a terrible situation.

Many of times I have had a sidekick with me, Donkey, whom would be available at any time and would have no extra cost to you. Together we have defeated a dragon and successfully saved the princess from the castle. We have also taken on an army of guards who worked in Lord Farquaas castle.

If you have questions, please call me at 800-256-8794. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Sincerely,

Shrek Ogre

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