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LINGO Part 1 The stupid half of me said to my other half, why don’t you write a Blog about military language and its civilian equivalents? It was more an instruction rather than a question; many will know that my stupid half is dominant My more intelligent half had a knee-jerk reaction and thought, why not catalogue the contents of Noah’s Ark, or, here’s a Gordian knot, undo it and neatly stow away that rope, please. But then again, what fun! During a period in my Army career, I had the privilege of serving with an incredibly diverse group from all corps and arms and spent a considerable amount of time on operations with nearly all Infantry regiments. That meant absorbing some of their own unique language, words, phrases, and sayings. Evolutionary linguistics is the interdisciplinary?study?of the emergence of the?languages. I have no such ability, but our Armed Forces have the unique capability to create words born out of their experiences that find their way into the Oxford English Dictionary, and over the years many words that started as military slang have found their way into everyday parlance. Given the plethora of sources out there (this blog began as +70,000 words long). I am surprised that the Defence Centre for Languages and Culture (DCLC) does not provide a course on the language and culture of the Royal Marines, the Parachute Regiment, the Guards, or any of the Corps and Regiments, Royal Air Force, and Royal Navy. Such is the panoply of lexicon!Once I thought about writing a tongue in cheek guide to good eating in Security Forces bases in an Egon Ronay style. A missed opportunity?If you are a Service Leaver and getting ready to look for a job on Civvy Street, you may need some basic training on?how to convert your military language into terms that will resonate and connect with civilian employers. While translating "militarese" is not an exact science, it is essential to become familiar with the terminology of businesses in Civvy Street, and how some of it might equate to your individual military experience. Transitioning back to civilian life can be daunting in itself, changing aspects of your language to more effectively connect and communicate are essential to the successful Veteran.It can be painful for Veterans to hear discussions and watch movies about modern wars when the dialogue is full of obsolete slang. Language changes with the times and the Armed Forces are no different. Personnel deployed on operations Northern Ireland, Bosnia, the Falklands, Iraq and Afghanistan have developed an expansive military vocabulary, taking elements from popular culture as well as the doublespeak of the military industrial complex. The ideal is to find work in a company of like-minded souls and continue to speak the way you used to and engage in the inevitable banter. However, the ideal is not always available, and Veterans make changes to their life to succeed.Of course, we Brits have inherited some language from our allies, such as - REMF from the Americans. We all know what that means, but I prefer the typically British, less crude, understated, yet cutting – PONTI (Person of No Tactical Importance). A great many Armed Forces euphemisms translate perfectly in Civvy Street, and continue to have high relevance, for example;7 P's“Prior Planning and Preparation Prevents a Piss Poor Performance”So, what works, what needs translating, and what really shouldn’t be used at all with the uninitiated (Civilians)?Term / PhraseMeaningTranslationRemarksAll cammed up and nowhere to goA cancelled operationCancelledWill probably need explaining.AllyThe term for a battlefield fashionistaChic – Trendsetting…Andy Capp’s CommandosArmy Catering CorpsCooksWill probably need explaining.BalticColdFreezing coldCivilians might not understand the level of cold that you are trying to describe.Bangstick / BunduqiaRifleWeaponMore likely to become your Cell phone and Laptop.BanterRuthless mickey taking and character assassinationTeasingWith extreme caution, Civvies really don’t get it!BashaSleeping quartersHomeWill probably need explaining.Ball baggedKnackeredFatiguedBe polite!Battle TaxiWarrior APCThe Underground, Bus, and Taxis.How you get to work.Beer TokensMoneyCash, probably a credit cardIt has other uses in Civvy Street.BezzaBest mateBest FriendBiscuit TinUnarmoured Land RoversChelsea TractorsOften poorly parked.Bible BangerRoyal Navy term for PadreVicar or PriestBiff / BifferSomeone who spends a lot of time on sick notesA possible malingererBiff chitSicknoteDoctors NoteEssential if you go unserviceable in Civvy Street.BimbleWalking slowly without intent.Stroll, amble, wanderYou will see a lot of that in Civvy Street.BinnedDischargedFired, made redundant, sacked.No explanation neededBlack TaxiBootsWalking shoesBleepsRoyal Signals personnelProbably the IT DepartmentVeteransBlightyThe UKEngland, N. Ireland, Scotland, and WalesHomeBlue JobsThe subject of much banterRoyal Air ForceVeterans from the RAFA Bunch of FivesPunchPhysical violenceMy Dad used to call it that.BobfocBody off Baywatch Face of CrimewatchReferring to unattractive womenNot politically correct, be carefulBobfokBody of Barbie Face of KenAs aboveNot politically correct, be carefulBodysnatchersStretcher bearersThe Ambulance ServiceA bit dark for general useBootneck or BootiesRoyal MarinesRoyal MarinesBoomstickA shotgun used for breachingA tool used for sweeping the floor.Brag Rags –Medal’s and campaign ribbonsYour Veterans badge – Wear it with pride!Brylcreem Boys –Royal Air ForceWWII term for RAFVeteransBrown Jobs / Pongo’sRAF and Navy slang for the ArmyWWII term still in use, but not as widelyVeteransBucksheeSpare kit acquired without proper chitsUnaccounted for spare equipmentCabbage Commando ChefSee Andy Capps CommandosCake & Arse PartyNot very goodHighly DisorganisedCanteen MedalsFood stains on your uniformKeep a spare shirt and tie at the officeChin-strappedKnackeredVery tiredChogeyLocally Employed Civilian (in overseas camp)Caution – not politically correct, don’t use it.Chocolate OrangeGeneral, Commanding OfficerCEO or Managing DirectorThe Boss.CorgiCO’s really good ideaCEO’s directive or initiativeChunkyPioneer CorpsRoadworkerVeteranChippyRubbish kit – your kit looks proper chippyPound shop clothing and equipmentLow-cost stuff.Colonel GadaffiNAAFIPub, Restaurant, BarTerm / PhraseMeaningTranslationRemarksCombat HandbagNew smaller issue BergenLaptop BagThings change, although you can carry your laptop in a backpack if you missioned LabourerLate Entry OfficerConsultantOlder, wiser, and often a VeteranCrab AirRAFLow-Cost AirlinesCrowRecruitCan’t Read or WriteThey walk amongst us.DesmondsThe SASTo be treated with respect.VeteransDesert LilyUrinals made from canteen tins or other empty cansThe restroom.Portaloo.DhobiWashingLaundryDhobi DustWashing powderDaz, Omo, Ariel…..Dig OutHelp YourselfThe self-serve buffetAll you can eat is not a challenge!DobraAlls goodEverything is okDonkey WalloperHousehold CavalryNice chap, works in the city.VeteranEgg BanjosFried egg sandwichesPret a Manger sandwichThey probably don’t do Egg BanjosEgyptian PTRestRestZZZzzzzzzzzzzFat AlbertHercules AircraftJumbo Jet or A380No business class in a HercFace like a robbers dog/face like a smashed spannerUnattractive, see Bobfoc/kNot attractiveFedsSpecial Investigation BranchThe Police (not the pop group)Even their mothers hate themFile 13put in the binShredderFish and ChipsFighting In Someone’s House and Causing Havoc In Public SpacesA traditional British MealSalt and vinegar?Fredfuture royal engineer disasterCarbunkle.See HRH Prince Charles for adviceFull screwCorporalProbably a Senior Manager, now.Highly motivated empire builders. Veteran.FobbitSomeone who doesn’t leave the Forward Operating BaseThe ReceptionistThey also serve who sit and waitFor those of you who have done well, Well Done! For those of you who didn't do quite so well, Bloody Well Done Anyway!”The CO is showing unoriginality and a lack of genuine interest.The CEO is showing unoriginality and a lack of genuine interest.GatRiflePenYour next weapon of choiceGetting Eyes OnSeeing somethingReading a SpreadsheetGlasshouseMilitary PrisonPrisonGleaming!Really goodExcellentGlito’sGood looking in theatre onlyWhat goes on tour stays on tour…ControversialGodRSMNot politically correct, a VeteranGod’s AcreParade SquareHorse Guards ParadeWhere Veterans fall in for Remembrance SundayGonk BagSleeping bagKing size double bedGrolliesUnderpantsUnderwearGropeGround operational exerciseCop a feelGross Misconduct, grounds for instant dismissalGravel Bashing / Square BashingMarching around the parade squareRepetitious training and evaluationGreen SlimeIntelligence CorpsCorporate IntelligenceGruntInfantry SoldierVeteranGym QueenPhysical Training InstructorPersonal TrainerVeteranHand your bedding inretiring from the army to do another jobService LeaverVeteranHanky Pankyginger beer or other non-alcoholic beverage mixed with whisky or brandy to get around dry ship rules (Royal Navy)Another reason for dismissalHeadsToilets (Navy)The gents, or the LadiesHoofingReally goodExcellentHorror bagPacked lunchPret a MangerPicnicTerm / PhraseMeaningTranslationRemarksIf it ain’t snowing, we ain’t going / if it ain't raining we ain't training – refers to the level of difficulty expected of every training exerciseJackSelfishVery SelfishCivilians might not understand the level of selfishness that you are trying to describe.JankersBe on a charge or punishment dutiesOn remandThat’s what my Dad used to call it.Kate CarneyArmyRhyming slangI was in the Kate.Kebab compassused to find their way to barracks when drunkNavigation by fast food outletsGet a Taxi homeKronenburg (Kronenburg 1664)out on the drink and a woman looks 16 from behind and 64 from the frontBe careful, not politically correctKit Kat arsethe effect of being sat in a Bedford four-ton truck for hours on endthe effect of being sat in an Underground train for hours on endNo changeLance JackLance CorporalProbably an old salt at Goods inVeteranLawndartParatrooperProbably on the “circuit”.A Veteran with Airborne InitiativeLong Range SniperRoyal ArtilleryGunners (not Arsenal FC)VeteranLumpy JumpersFemale Service PersonnelFemale colleaguesDo not use, not politically correct. Female Veterans.Green MaggotSleeping BagKing size double bedAnybody can be uncomfortableMatelotsSailorsRoyal NavyVeteransMeat headsRoyal Military Police (RMP)Even their mothers hate them…Veterans, so we love themMincingDoing things with no specific purposeA certain way of walkingBe careful, can be a politically incorrect termMOD plodsMinistry of Defence policePoliceMostly VeteransMonkey(s)RMPMore coppersVeteransMingingDisgustingDisgustingReally not niceMoon ChickenSomeone who is crazy or oddA weirdoThey walk amongst us…..Mouth Like Gandhi's flip flopDry mouthVery ThirstyCould probably use a beer or twoMuftiCivilian clothesYour day to day attireDress for SuccessMuppetMost Useless Person Pusher Ever TrainedEvery company has one…Muck and BulletsPretty badNot all Beer and SkittlesNot a great timeNFINo f**king interestNo flipping interestNATONormal Tea Order (white with two sugars)White with two sugars, please.NIGNew in Germany/New In GreenThe office juniorOff the hook / let out to playfirefightAt workUnless your civilian employment involves gun play…On StagOn Guard DutyAt workDay to day dutiesPadMarried quartersHomePavement PizzaVomitPressing sheetsSleepingSee Egyptian PTPimp-mobilesB7 armoured Range RoversVIP CP transportChelsea Tractors, often badly parkedPink deaththe meat put in ration packs by the cookhousePicnicSee Horror bagPoets dayPush off early tomorrows SaturdayFridayThe weekend is coming, use it wellPongoArmy (used by those, not in the Army)VeteranPONTIPerson Of No Tactical ImportanceA nicer version of REMFPersonnel probably on the company overheadRag orderA Squad or individual in disarray / in a messNo clear desk policyREMFRear Echelon Mother F*****sSee PONTIRock ApesRAF RegimentOften the source of much humour to other Armed ForcesVeteranTerm / PhraseMeaningTranslationRemarksRodneyOfficerAn awfully nice chapVeteranRupertOfficerAnother awfully nice chapVeteranSangarPossibly derived from the India a fortified observation and security positionA security position at a front gate or perimeter of a government building, possibly fortified.Scab LifterMedicFirst AiderA bit dark, use carefullyScaleysRoyal SignalsProbably the IT DepartmentVeteransScranFoodBreakfast, lunch, or dinnerSeptic TankYank (American)Our American cousinsColonialsShiny / Gucci KitRare or expensive equipmentLouis VuittonRelates to all expensive brandsSlop JockeyChefSee Cabbage CommandoArmed Forces cooks are a recurring theme in military humour and banter, VeteransSNAFUSituation Normal (all f**ked up)Administrative errorSneaky BeakyThem…..SnowdropRAF PoliceEven more policeVeteransSprogRecruitA School Leaver on Work Experience attachmentSteffi GrafLeyland Daf (4 Tonner)HGVSWATSome Weekends and TuesdaysThe Territorial ArmyReservistsSwamp DonkeySomeone who wets the bedTab (Tactical Advance to Battle)Long march with weightThe Underground and Buses are on strike.Teeny Weeny AirwaysArmy Air CorpsHelicoptersVIP transport or Air AmbulanceThis is boneBone is a favourite term for something pointlessTime wastingIt happens everywhere…..TomsYoung soldiers (Parachute Regiment)VeteransTrapping Kitworn with the intent of gaining female affectionSmart, casual or your clubbing outfitWebbingAs worn by the type of ladies I never get to meet, and several dodgy types down Union St.WetDrink, usually but not always a cup of tea (also brew)Earl Grey or Lapsang SouchonCan be taken NATOWhoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weaponsA sentiment is shared by Veterans frustrated by the pace and politics of the office.Willy Wocker –Chinook Helicopterif you see it in the city, it’s either lost, or something big is going downWingmanYour buddyColleagueCan also be your friendWooden TopsBrigade of GuardsNice chaps that work in the cityVeteransYaffleFoodBreakfast, Lunch, DinnerYaffling SpannersKnife, Fork & SpoonCutleryYompLong march with weight (Royal Marines)Public transport is on strike again!You’re on your own time nowA favourite motivational phrase from a Warrant OfficerUnpaid overtimeVoice Procedure?includes various techniques used to clarify, simplify and standardise spoken communications over Combat Net Radio, as used by the Armed Forces. A great deal of that also creeps into everyday speech, even SMS text, and emails, such as:Term / PhraseMeaningTranslationRemarksRoger that, sometimes abbreviated to - RTUnderstoodNot to be confused with…..AckAcknowledgedReceivedNot necessarily understoodWilcoWill ComplyWill get the task done.Say AgainRepeat your last messagePlease say that againVeterans, by nature of their unique experiences and background, are generally effective communicators, although sometimes their language of the past can creep in and identify them, Veterans:Listen first;They use people’s names more;They let others talk, and talk about themselves;They focus on making others feel important, and their inclusion;They emphasise similarities.“And with these words, I can see;Clear through the clouds that covered me;Just give it time then speak my name;Now we can hear ourselves again” – Pink Floyd ................
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