Leadership



Real-World Leadership

Closing the Gaps Between

What Sounds Good & What Gets Done

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“One afternoon in July 1968 the theoretical phase of my Marine training ended and the practical phase began—with a bang!”

The Relentless Search for Better Ways, Jim Bearden, 2006

They Came in the Evening

Takeaways

1. Two factors that impact individual & organizational success

➢ The hands we’re dealt (some good; some not so good – setbacks are inevitable)

➢ The choices we make about the hands we’re dealt

➢ The choices made by people in leadership positions are especially important

2. Responses to setbacks vary

➢ Some deny/resist what is, and then blame, wallow and quit

➢ Others acknowledge what is and then take timely, appropriate steps to deal with it

3. Organizational responses to setbacks are driven by their cultures, and their cultures are driven by the behavior of people in leadership positions

➢ Words & behavior are leaders’ tools for influencing the choices others make

➢ The things leaders say, do matter

➢ The things leaders do, matter more

What they see from you

is what you can expect to get

from them

4. Leadership is a two-dimensional process

➢ Mechanical dimension

• The things leaders do

• Behavioral responses to the hands they’re dealt

➢ Mental dimension

• The mental choices leaders make about the hands they’re dealt and the emotional consequences those mental choices produce

• The often unconscious—but powerful—mental choices that ultimately determine the effectiveness of their behavioral responses

For those committed to enhancing their effectiveness as leaders

Self-mastery precedes skills mastery

The hands we’re dealt do matter

The choices we make about the hands we’re dealt matter more!

1. 2020 – a year full of bad hands

➢ The pandemic and all the ways it has impacted you and your families

➢ The fear of contracting the virus and transmitting it to your family members

➢ Mi ano del cuchillo

• Ribs

• Heart twice

2. Things we know

➢ In the real world, setbacks are inevitable; we will be dealt some bad hands

➢ We always make choices about the bad hands we’re dealt

➢ Those choices are based more on our perspectives than on the bad hands themselves

3. Two perspectives in play

➢ The Victim Perspective (emotional victimhood)

➢ The Hero Perspective (emotional accountability)

The Victim Perspective The Hero Perspective

Emotional Victimhood Emotional Accountability

Beliefs

My feelings are the emotional My feelings are the emotional

consequences of the hands consequences of the mental

I’m dealt choices I make about the

hands I’m dealt

Choices Based on Beliefs

Establish “rules” for what must Define the things I prefer to

or must not happen out there happen or not happen out there

(heavy emotional attachment) (less emotional attachment)

In the Real World

“Rules” will be broken Preferences will not all be met

Setbacks are inevitable Setbacks are inevitable

Choices Made About Setbacks

Blame, Wallow, Quit 4 alternative choices

Compound suffering Reduce suffering

Make bad hands worse Support effective responses

Alternatives to Resisting “What is”

4 Heroic Mental Choices to Make

Start paying closer attention to your emotions, and when you find yourself experiencing a negative feeling, take a brief time out from the drama and complete the following steps:

1. Acknowledge and name the negative feeling you’re experiencing

➢ Don’t settle for “feeling bad” or “bummed out”

➢ Name the specific feeling, e.g., respirator, the 2nd time – got past the discomfort to identify the feeling: fear

2. Answer some simple questions about that negative feeling

➢ Where and how does it show up? e.g., respirator – tense muscles, shallow, rapid breathing

➢ How intense is it? e.g., I gave my fear 6 on a scale of 1 - 10

NOTE: Here are 3 benefits of answering those questions

➢ You will recognize that the negative feeling is in you, but it is not you

➢ The you that is asking and answering these questions is separate from the negative feeling you are experiencing

➢ By engaging your conscious mind to answer these questions you cannot be using your unconscious mind to feed (sustain and intensify) the negative feeling

3. Next—and this is where the real power is—just allow yourself to experience the negative feeling; just let it be there without denying or resisting it

NOTE: Here are 3 benefits of just allowing yourself to experience the negative feeling

➢ You’ll realize that the negative feeling won’t kill you; you can actually live with it

➢ You’ll find that in a few seconds, the intensity of the negative feeling subsides

➢ And in a few more seconds you’ll find that the negative feeling passes; it can’t retain its intensity or even remain in you unless you continue to feed it with your thoughts (most unconscious)

4. Identify the rule or rules that had been violated

➢ Remember, you have heavy emotional attachment to your rules

➢ Completing the first 3 steps is a process you can use to upgrade rules to preferences

➢ And upgrading rules to preferences is the road to self-mastery

Heroes & Victims

A Tale of 2 Perspectives

None of us is going to accomplish, acquire or become what we desire without encountering some setbacks. The hands we’re dealt are not all good ones. In fact here are three truths about setbacks:

1. Setbacks are inevitable

2. We always make choices about the setbacks we encounter

3. Those choices are determined more by our perspectives than by the setbacks themselves

There are two types of perspectives people use most frequently to process setbacks. The first—and by far more popular—is what I call the victim perspective. People using the victim perspective are convinced that their feelings about the setbacks they encounter and the things they do to deal with those setbacks are determined by the setbacks.

I refer to the second type of perspective used to process setbacks as the hero perspective. It is far less common than the victim perspective. It is also the one effective leaders work to develop and employ. People using the hero perspective understand that their feelings about the setbacks they encounter are determined by the mental choices they make about those setbacks.

In your discussion groups please us the worksheet on the following page to answer—and have someone write your answers to—the following questions. We’ll hear responses from some of the groups today, and Jessica will ask all groups to submit their responses so she can compile a master list and distribute it to all.

1. Who is someone (alive or dead) whom the members of your group see as having provided effective leadership in spite of being dealt some bad hands (encountering significant setbacks)?

2. What sort of setbacks did that person encounter, and how did that person’s responses to those setbacks reflect a hero—versus a victim—perspective?

3. Why is the perspective leaders use for processing setbacks especially important?

4. For each of your personal reflection: Which members of your justice court staff seem predisposed to making victim choices about the setbacks they encounter?

Heroes & Victims

WORKSHEET

Key Leadership Role

Consciously Create Cultures that Support Behavior

Essential to Organizational Success

___________________________________are to ___________________________________

what ___________________________are to _____________________________________

Most Organizations Suffer from “Bi-Culture Disorder”

1. Professed cultures (the one they claim to have)

➢ Expressed in words & phrases (concepts)

➢ Those words & phrases have two things in common

• They all sound good

• They have little or no impact on employees’ behavior

2. Actual cultures (the one they do have)

➢ Expressed in behavior (what gets done)

➢ Professed cultures (things that sound good), seldom bear any resemblance to actual cultures (things that get done)

3. Gaps – between what sounds good & what gets done

Leadership Behavior

For Closing the Gaps (Creating or Fine-Tuning Your Justice Court Culture)

1. Ensure that others understand what you expect them to do

2. Identify & eliminate barriers to those behaviors

3. Model that behavior

4. Measure their performance using those expectations as the standards

5. Honor efforts & progress toward meeting your expectations

6. Confront unwillingness/bad faith

Two Steps Leaders Must Take

To Consciously Create or Fine-Tune Organizational Culture

1. Ensure that others understand the things they’re expected to do

➢ Three reasons people fail to meet leaders’ expectations

• They know what they’re expect to do but are ______________________________________

• They know what they’re expected to do but are ____________________________________

• They _________ _______ ________ ___________ ________________ _______ ______

Ensuring that others understand the things you expect them to do is essential

for closing the gaps between what sounds good (your professed culture)

and what gets done (your actual culture)

➢ Start with ONE general expectation – ONE broad type of behavior you’d like to see more of, e.g., teamwork

➢ Identify ONE specific situation – one in which your general expectation is especially important to your justice court operations and staff morale

➢ Define the specific behaviors you expect – the specific things you expect employees to do in that situation, specific behaviors you would see as evidence of teamwork

2. Confront unwillingness/bad faith

➢ Most people will make good-faith effort to meet your reasonable expectations – Some Won’t

➢ You do a disservice to those who will by tolerating/ignoring those who won’t – So Don’t

➢ Confront the choices people make, not the people who make them

➢ Confront to restore, not to punish

➢ Failure to confront unwillingness/bad faith…

• Enables the ________________________________________

• Demoralizes the ____________________________________

• Undermines leaders’ _________________________________

• Widens the gaps between what sounds good & what gets done

Teamwork

From something that sounds good to something that gets done

The first step leaders must take to get more of the behavior they desire is ensure that the people from whom they desire that behavior understand what it is they’re expected to do.

Here are the premises on which I base that conclusion:

1. One of the reasons employees fail to consistently engage in the types of behavior leaders expect is because they (employees) don’t understand the things they would have to do to meet those expectations

2. One of the reasons employees don’t understand the things leaders expect them to do is because most leaders convey their expectations in vague—almost abstract—terms

3. Instead of expecting employees to translate broad expectations, e.g., “teamwork,” into specific behavior, leaders must either define, or facilitate collaborative processes for defining specific behaviors associated with those broad expectations, the specific things employees are expected to do.

Using teamwork as a broad type of behavior you would like to have more of in your justice courts, I invite you and the members of your group to answer the following two questions using the worksheet on the following page. We’ll hear responses from some of the groups today, and Jessica will ask all groups to submit their responses so she can compile a master list and distribute it to all.

1. What is one situation in which you believe teamwork is especially important in your justice court?

2. Define some of the specific things you would expect employees to do in that situation, behavior you would see as evidence of teamwork.

Teamwork

WORKSHEET

How Leadership Skills are Improved & Cultures Created

In the Real World

1. A little theory and lots of effort

➢ The question isn’t, “Are you able?”

➢ The real question is, “Are you willing?”

2. Some Success; Some Failure

➢ Some people will respond favorably to your leadership behavior; others won’t

➢ In the real world, setbacks are inevitable

Success & failure will characterize

your efforts to create the culture you desire.

Your commitment to doing so is best measured

by your responses to your failures

3. From the inside out

➢ The hands you’re dealt do matter

➢ The choices you make about the hands you’re dealt matter more

➢ This is especially true for people in leadership positions

The morning after on Hill 512…

Heroic Leadership

Most Difficult When It’s Most Needed

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