That Witch Life



Episode 87: Brujeria with Dr. Maria DeBlassieWed, 5/26 6:21PM ? 1:18:12SUMMARY KEYWORDSmagick, people, spell, book, tarot, check, ghosts, watch, courtney, hear, acknowledging, absolutely, episode, maria, feel, albuquerque, life, bought, living, practiceSPEAKERSKanani, Intro music, Courtney , Hilary, Dr. Maria DeBlassie, Brian, All Three, (Exit Music)Intro music 00:2920 years ago, three young friends realized they were witches. They scattered to different parts of the world following Magick and Spirit. Now, they're back in their hometown to share what they've learned. Welcome to That Witch Life Podcast. Your home for living as a Witch in today's world. Courtney 00:48Hello, everybody, and welcome back to that which live Podcast. I am your host today. My name is Courtney. Hilary 00:54And I am Hilary.Kanani 00:55And I'm Kanani.Courtney 00:56And we had the most wonderful and wonderful interview with Dr. Maria DeBlassie about Brujeria. So that is coming up, and we cannot wait to share it with you. In the meantime, a little bit of follow up from our last episode. Shortly after I confessed that I am terrified of aliens, Kanani posted something on my page, which both comforted me and frightened me more. There is a big theory going on that the UFOs that we have been seeing and have been set like have been spotted, are actually time traveling humans from the future. And I read through the article that Kanani posted on my page. And I called her to say I'm on board. I agree with it. But it turns out she actually never read it. She's one of those people who just posts things on my timeline without actually reading them. So did you guys read this? Did you hear this though? Re, I mean, I don't know. I called Kanani she but, Re, have you heard this that some people believe that UFOs. Hilary 01:54I have heard that. I still think it's aliens. Okay, sorry.Courtney 02:00Okay. Okay. But all right. All right. So here's what here's what, here's what what people have said, the alleged abduction accounts are mostly scientific in nature, because getting probed is science.(Hilary laughs) It's probably future anthropologists, human historians, linguists that are coming back to get information in a way that we currently can't access without that technology. So Kanani 02:24So what you're saying is, I need to tell my husband, it's not weird it's science.... is that what you're saying?!Courtney 02:30I'm gonna start telling my husband that everything is not weird that it's just science. I just, but it actually does make sense, okay, cuz they, they kind of look like us in a way, but we don't look like the first homosapiens really, you know, we our faces are very different, they probably would have thought that we were frickin aliens. And so it makes kind of sense. You know, they have like two legs and two arms. And they act like us in a way. I mean, they, you know, if our modern day technology allowed us to go back to the time of the pyramids to see how they were used, we would do it, right, if they allow us to go back to the days of the early Homo sapiens, and like, abducted one and take a bunch of samples of their, you know, DNA, and then like, erase their memory and release them back into the wild. We would totally do that. Right?! Hilary 03:24Courtney? Courtney 03:25What?Hilary 03:25Courtney? What if I told you that you've known an alien your whole life and it's me.Courtney 03:32I would be like, of course, that would make perfect sense. Who else can OH MY GOD! (Courtney screams) Brian just scared me!!Kanani 03:49Ah, awesome. Well done. The fact that we just I wish we can't I wish we had this video for people to share. Where Courtney looked like she was about to pee her pants and just looked horrified for a moment.Courtney 04:20I mean, I thought he was a human from the future.Kanani 04:26Because that's normal.Brian 04:27Hi! I didn't mean to scare youHilary 04:40Brian, Brian, tell Brian. Thank you for this gift.Courtney 04:44I'm on the headphones but, Hilary says thank you for that gift.Kanani 04:47Tell him. Tell him probing's not weird. It's science. Brian 04:51Hi! Kanani 04:51probing's not weird. It's science.Courtney 04:56Kanani says probing is not weird. It's science. Brian 05:00What?Hilary 05:01I only probed you a few times Courtney, Courtney 05:04I don't want to talk about it! Hilary 05:06Only told me twice. But that one time. (Courtney continues laughing) Oh my god. Brian 05:14Are you okay?!(directed to Courtney)Hilary 05:16No,Brian 05:16I didn't mean to scare you. Hilary 05:18Is she?Kanani 05:24poor husband!Courtney 05:26poor husband my ass. He's fine. Hi, honey. Welcome home. Brian 05:29Hi. So you were talking about the humans from the future? Yes. Okay. I just want to say how much that's all BS.Courtney 05:35Okay. Anyway, love you, sweetie. Can you close that door? Brian 05:38Sure, I'll close the door now. I'll try and not scare you now.Kanani 05:43Wow. Tell him not to look so humanoid next time.Courtney 05:51Okay, all right. Well, yes, this is gonna go down in one of the classic TWL replay's. (laughing continues)So speaking of things that are scary, or rather supposed to be scary.Kanani 06:15Is this is a segue into me somehow?Courtney 06:25This episode is not going very well.Hilary 06:29We are fucked. This is like quincunx. But worse,Courtney 06:34if this is the first time you've listened to the show. It's actually like, it's actually like this a lot of the time. So. Okay, um, okay. Well, speaking of actually, what I was gonna say is speaking of things that are not scary, or that are rather disappointing. Season Three of haunted is now available on Netflix. And I gotta tell ya, I watched one episode and it sucks.Hilary 06:59Does it suck?Courtney 07:00Yeah. Hillary's like, oh, does it?Hilary 07:04I don't think I ever watched it though. Courtney 07:07You know, the first two seasons were really interesting. There. There was one episode in particular, I think it was season two, which was the premise of haunted is that it's there supposed to be true stories. And they really had me going for the first two seasons. And maybe the first two seasons were true stories, because that's the shit I like to watch. I like to watch people telling true ghost stories. I'm not all that interested in. Like, I never really got into American Horror Story. It just I want to, I'm more of an unsolved mysteries kind of gal, you know. Um, so the premise was, is that somebody sits in there with their friends. And they're telling the story of a really horrifying encounter they have with the supernatural. And one of the ones that I that I really do think is real, probably people have had this experience came from a US Marine, who was over in the Middle East and had an experience with what I suspect was a Djin and Re, And from this, it seems to me that the Djin was protecting their area and was trying to keep what is essentially an invader who was essentially an invader out. No disrespect to military people. I'm just looking at it from the, from the Djin's point of view, which is such a thing for me to say, Wow, whoever wrote my script today is really on the ball. You know, but you know, that there were that he was he didn't name it a Djin, but he was describing like, this character, that that are this creature that he said was demonic that had very fiery eyes that came out of the desert. It's like, well, there's a lot of that in Middle Eastern folklore. So maybe he did have a true encounter. I mean, I believed that story. But this first story, sorry, y'all spoiler alert for Episode One of season three. It's this woman. She's sitting up there with her friends and she said, Oh, I lived in this cabin with my boyfriend. It was pure evil. We were just sitting there and I just one day felt like there was something behind the wall. So he took out a he took out his chainsaw and he carved a hole in the wall. And I'm like, Who does that? Unless they have reason? Like, was there? No, she didn't say there was a sound..Kanani 09:11Well, I mean, I have my moods. Courtney 09:13I mean, you do but you...something usually. (Screaming goat) Oh my god, the screaming goat! We haven't seen you in ages. I missed the Screaming Goat!!Hilary 09:21I know. Well, the screaming goat was in a box until recently.Courtney 09:25Both of you moving! I'm not okay with this. We need to just have the moving be done. Anyway, like they were Yeah, exactly. So anyways, (Screaming Goat) they she, they open up this wall and they saw all this blood that was like leading to a drain that led down to the basement. And then they just decided for that that day to like, go explore the basement for the first time and they're like, oh, there were all these chains. It seems like there was a serial killer there. And then they're like so we just kept on with our lives. And I'm like, Okay, wait a minute, you didn't notice the smell. And really notice all this stuff like razor blades and chains. You just Go Hmm, that's odd. And just like continue on, continue on. And then, you know, no surprise there, the house turns out to be evil and starts like, you know, her boyfriend was like, I'm gonna channel The being through me, which actually sounds like some of the things I see people say on Facebook. So I'm not I believe that part of it that somebody would try something like this. But then it's like, oh, then the house destroyed him. And I'm like, okay, I don't believe the story. I think this is. Yeah. So anyway, if you were interested in seeing Haunted season three, let me know if the episodes get better. But after that one, I went, Okay, this is some BS, and I'm gonna go watch something else. So but Kanani, you said you finished watching Shadow and Bone?Kanani 10:42I did. I actually, I really liked it. It wasCourtney 10:46oh, wait do we have spoilers coming up. Should we warn people? Kanani 10:50No, I mean, I'm not gonna give specifics of how it ends or anything like that. I just think it was. It was interesting. They definitely...Apparently, it's based on a book. And there are other books. And you could see at the end, how they lead into kind of further story. So I'll definitely watch the next season. I mean, I thought it was really good. I thought it was interesting. How they have these magical people. And yeah, I don't want to give too much away because it's still fairly new. But I definitely would encourage people to watch it. I think it's fun. I mean, I don't think there's anything you know, it's not like, Oh, this is exactly what it's like being witchy. But I mean, you know, this is the kind of crap we love, so totally go for it. I thought it was cute. I thought it was fun. It's just one season right now. I think there were only eight episodes. So I was able to pretty much binge it in two sittings, which I like. And like I said it was a book. I haven't really read online because I always love to do the spoilers, but I kind of watched it so fast I didn't have a chance to ruin everything for myself. So I haven't heard like whether people who read the books say it's, you know, true to the story, because, you know, there's always the people that bitch about it. "No, it's completely different" like, I have no idea. So, but for people interested in watching it, I would totally give it a go. It's fun. Like I said, it's only it's only eight episodes about an hour an episode. So it's just kind of a fun thing to just sit and binge.Courtney 12:09Yeah, I'm through Episode Four. And I, it took me a bit. Um, I you know,Kanani 12:14it took me a couple episodes.Courtney 12:16I just got so ruined by Game of Thrones, because it was such a rich dichotomy of, or mix of worlds and a mix of fantasy and things. And of course, I was heartbroken by season eight, which was one of the most great television atrocities of all time. Sorry, but I amKanani 12:35Not because Cersei is life. I mean, let's be real Cersei is life goals.Courtney 12:39(Sighs) NO! Oh my God, my God. It's just like, why do you How can you just like develop a character so far? And they just go Okay, nevermind and then just throw all this character and plot out the window?? Just like,Kanani 12:52I loved it. I loved that. I loved the end of the season. And I love that other people hated it. Because I truly I know I love that. I love that ICourtney 13:01just like they're like, let's we've we've we've worked for seven, eight years to build Daenerys into this very complicated character and we're going to reduce her to a cranky girlfriend. Like, no, that's that's not working for me. So anyway, that's a whole other episode. But okay, well, I look forward to watching the rest of Shadow and Bone. Believe it or not, listeners, Kanani is giving you a thumbs up for Shadow and Bone. And she rarely gives a thumbs up for anything. So I guess this means that Kanani 13:02It's true. I hate most things!Courtney 13:13 that they should watch it and we all should watch it and the show should sponsor us. So now that I've said that, yes, yes. Anyway, speaking of monsters, apparently also Kanani Kanani 13:40THAT'S a segue to me! Courtney 13:42Yeah, that is a segue to you. So apparently, after our last episode on crystals, you were inspired to go spend money at a crystal store and you wanted to tell us all about it. So your kids aren't going to college now. No college for you!Kanani 13:58They'll be fine. They'll have street smarts. So for those who may be new or haven't heard of all of the saga, we sold our condo a few weeks ago. So we are living on top of each other in an extended stay hotel, making the best of it.Courtney 14:16 If you're from Beaverton, you know what that means.Kanani 14:18We're all pretty much in the same room all the time because my kids are still doing distance learning. I work from home. My husband is the only one who is allowed to escape. Last weekend, he was out of town for a state tournament. And the kids and I were here it was Friday. And I knew we were going to run away to seaside to go see my parents on Saturday and I was like, why even stay here tonight. Let's just run away to the beach tonight. Let's just go and the kids got all excited and we packed our bags.Courtney 14:48You know what? this reminds me. When we were in our early 20s we used to do this but we would leave at like one in the morning and get there and wait for the sunrise only to remember that the sun does not rise on the Pacific coast. In North America, yeah, because it's the west coast! So that's honestly what happened to almost everyone who lives in Oregon at some point you drove to the beach in the middle of night to watch the sunrise only to have it come up behind you. So but now Hilary 15:13it's pretty it's still pretty though when the sun comes up because like Kanani 15:17yeah when you're ass is sitting in sand, you don't care! Hilary 15:20Yeah, I mean like it's not like you're not you're not watching it rise like you watch it set on the on the West Coast but, but you I mean, it's still nice to like sit at dawn and like have the light slowly come I don't know. It's prettyCourtney 15:32but it's just to say gone are the days when Kanani would drive to the beach in the middle of the night so she could chug blackberry brandy on the beach. Now if she throws her kids in the car at 6pm so she can fall asleep in her mom's couch in front of Netflix by eight. Yep,Kanani 15:47yep, that's pretty much how it went down. I dropped em off said here's your grandchildren I went out I got myself something to eat sounds about right I brought packed up all of our laundry now like, here's my laundry old woman, we're gonna need to get this done. And oh my god. And on Saturday, I went and visited one of my best friends who works at a jewelry store on the strip called Molly Morgan. And they sell crystal jewelry. And she sends me pictures all the time of all this all this stuff that I would just love and so I've been...Courtney 16:18Does she get commission? Is that why she wants you there? So she can Kanani 16:21I don't think she does. She should because she would have made a lot on Saturday. But she had already bought as as a gift for me. She had bought me a matching we have these matching labradorite coffin rings. And she and she brought and she bought me these Black Onyx coffin earrings that we both have. So they're matching. And so the fun thing about the labradorite was that it's good for getting rid of negative energy, getting rid of past attachments, indecision.Courtney 16:56It's a coffin. It's like this little coffin of negativity.Kanani 17:01And it looks so pretty. Oh my god. Like I should have always had a coffin on my finger. Like what the hell? Why did you drop the ball, Courtney??Courtney 17:09I wouldn't know.Kanani 17:10So then. And she got me and so then the Black Onyx for the coffin earrings is supposed to be good for absorbing negative energy, helping to release mental stress, promote, promote emotional well being all of the things I'm lacking right now.Courtney 17:29So this is the this is why I don't get you this stuff as like nothing like something in the shape of death to bring you mental clarity and Kanani 17:36to bring me joy and grounding. Absolutely. Yes. To fill my heart with peace. And then I bought this huge, ginormous badass black obsidian ring. That's pretty much I have giant hands. And it's the size of my entire knuckle.And so and I have a black obsidian thumb, thumb ring that I've had for a few years that I bought for grounding and for just kind of helping to get rid of negative energy and things like that and for protection. And so now I have on both hands black obsidian, which I absolutely love. And it's funny because usually I would put on my jewelry if I went out for the day. And now it's like I find I put it I put on all my jewelry first thing in the morning. It just, I love it. It doesn't matter if I'm in my pajamas, watching TV, drinking coffee, I have all of my I have all of my Bojangles on now.Courtney 18:39You have fully sunk into your soccer mom morticia you are in your sweatpants wearing the jewels.Kanani 18:48And then the other thing that I bought, which I'm absolutely, I actually left not buying it. And then I went back and I'm like I have to have it and she laughed. She's like, of course you do. It's a giant like two inch Moonstone on a bracelet that I'm just like obsessed with.Hilary 19:04I'm jealous. I'm jealous about that one.Kanani 19:06Oh it's so GOOD!! And it's supposed to be good for helping with kind of your intuition and helping to increase psychic abilities and just kind of bringing about you know, positive energy positive thoughts, things like that. So So anyway, so that was our that was our crystal extravaganza over the weekend. And like I said, I'm, I'm thrilled.Hilary 19:34That sounds like a giant success.Kanani 19:37It was you know what I have to say, when we came back. I've been much calmer. I think, you know, it's not just that there's some other I'm starting my husband's starting to be home a little bit more and I'm getting some more FaceTime with him and as much as I love to bitch about him like he is what keeps me grounded in this world.Courtney 19:55You actually like him; remember. one day you turned to me and you said you know what? I realized something today and I said, Okay, and you said, I really like Mr. Kanani. I genuinely like him. And I said,Kanani 20:06he was annoying; he threw the whole Elizabeth Taylor thing out the window because I'm like, Well, I like tolerate you so Wow. Like, I don't think that's ever gonna happen again. Let's be real let's play the odds here. I mean, Vegas Vegas odds are not on my side. I mean, actually posted pictures of pretty much all of it. I didn't post pictures of the kids stuff yet. But I posted that on my Instagram at soccer mom morticia for anyone who follows me on Insta and if you don't start following me,Courtney 20:36Well, you know, follow the, follow thatwitchlife on Instagram the video we posted last week with Kanani's crystal Hall is in there so you can see a clip of all the stuff she bought. So a couple of shout outs... I mentioned this last week, but just make sure people remember. Don't forget that LlewellynCon2021 is coming up, which is their free virtual convention. Again, author presentations, giveaways, and more. It's 10 days and 40 authors. So June 10 through June 19. If you go to LlewellynCon2021 you can register for giveaways and view the events schedule and Book your free spot. So awesome. Make sure to check that out. And there is a another book coming out if you um, you're all going to just love this conversation with Maria and so if the topic of Brujeria is something you want to know more about. Jay Allen Krause, who is a local Pacific Northwest writer has his own debut book coming out called American Brujeria, which is a fascinating blend of American and Mexican folk magick that is currently practiced by those living the United States, but whose roots are steeped in Mexican culture. So Jay includes stories from Mexico folk saints, the story of Guadalupe, the influence of Catholicism, spiritual cleansings, spell casting, oil crafting, and praying the rosary in both English and Spanish. Okay, so it's, it is a magical treasure trove and what they call a wisdom window into some of the most time honored practices of Mexican Brujeria and his own Mexican American Brujeria. So you can order this wherever you get books. Again, it is Jay Allen Cross's American Brujeria. And we want to thank all of our supporters and our listeners, and if you support us on Patreon, you know that last week, we released our bonus content with Kathleen Borealis, where we talked about the ethics of crystal mining and there was a lot that I did not know and it gave me a lot of great insight in how to shop for crystals and you know, how I find rockhounds and really, really really important stuff, so for as little as $1 a month you can get access to this and other witchism content. higher levels get you access to our private facebook page a live virtual special events, which we have another one coming up early release episodes, longer ad free episodes and even a quarterly subscription box and even a tarot card pull for you on the show. And today I am pulling for Katie who just joined at the So mote that shit level which gives her access to all the goodies including our magickal subscription box. The upcoming box is all Summer Solstice related. So spells and books and oils and all kinds of great stuff that you need to do summer magick all summer long. Alright, so Katie, Your card is The Five of Wands. All right. So this is a card that says it's time to get organized and time to streamline and don't let not let little stuff trip you up. It's a really important time to get focused and start working on a goal and minimize your distractions. So whatever it is that you really want to do, it's time to shut out the the influences the voices, maybe even close some social media portals in order to get done what you need to get done. So thank you so much, Katie for joining us at the So mote that shit level. Other ways to support the show. If you can't do a monthly donation, you can always buy us a coffee or buy That Witch Life merchandise on Etsy, or consider becoming an episode sponsor. It is a great way to promote your business to 1000s of witches. Or simply purchase a shout out which lets people know about your virtual event or sends love to your favorite witch. And you can find out more on our website at . And now let's hear from our episode sponsors. It's summertime and we are soaking in fresh herbs and wonderful flavors. So for those of you wanting to infuse more magick into your cooking, eating, or both, there's a new book out to help you transform the mundane chore of preparing a meal into a magickal act of healing, manifesting and creating Kitchen Witchery by Laurel Woodward elevates the way you cook and prepare meals and it presents a wide variety of correspondences techniques and recipes for every ingredient in your kitchen. Organized by food type. You'll learn the magickal ins and outs of a ton of different food items including wheats and flowers, beans and lentils, nuts and seeds, oil and vinegar, sweet spices and herbs, vegetables, fruits, dairy and eggs, drinks and gluten free meals, which is a big deal for me. Author Laura Woodward shares the magick of everyday living, revealing how each task can be like a ritual of creation. You'll enjoy recipes for the season's, special oil and seasoning blends, and other clever ways to make any ingredient into a magickal tool. So you can pre order your copy of Kitchen Witchery today at and save 20% with coupon code Kitchen20. That's kitchen 2-0. This coupon is valid through June 30 2021. And it is not valid in conjunction with any other discounts or previously placed orders. Please note that you do need to be logged in to your account for the coupon to apply. So again, pre order Kitchen Witchery by Laura Woodward today, and we very much want to thank Llewellyn for being an episode sponsor. All right friends, we have an incredible guest today and I am so delighted to have her with us. Dr. Maria DeBlassie is a native New Mexican mestiza blogger, award-winning writer, and award-winning educator living in the Land of Enchantment. She writes about everyday magic, ordinary gothic, and all things witchy. When she is not practicing brujeria, she is teaching classes about bodice rippers, modern mystics, and things that go bump in the night. She is forever looking for magic in her life and somehow always finding more than she thought was there. Find out more about Maria and conjuring everyday magic at . Welcome, Maria. How are you? Dr. Maria DeBlassie 27:04Hi, thank you so much for having me here. I'm so excited to be here. Courtney 27:09I'm gonna throw you a curveball question that I didn't put in the notes that I sent you. But I just want to know is Alburquerque as magickal? As I believe it is? Dr. Maria DeBlassie 27:20Oh, yes. I left for graduate school for four years and then came right back because I couldn't stay away from the from the magics. It is, it is a beautiful place to live.Hilary 27:33I went there for the first time a few years ago. spent some time in Albuquerque, Albuquerque and then some time in Santa Fe, because I have some friends that work and got to like, go hang out with...that whole area is full of magick. It's really incredible.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 27:50It is and it's you can just feel it in the land too. And in the sky. It's it's like in the air we breathe. Hilary 27:57It really is. Yeah, I agree. It's incredible.Courtney 27:59And unfortunately, so many people just think of Albuquerque and they think of Breaking Bad, which is an incredible series. But that's also not what...(laughs)And that just can't be what it's all about. And I've always heard people that go to Albuquerque, they say that place is just different. It's just magickal. There's something about it. And so you're saying it really is the land of enchantment.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 28:23It really is and this is like this is gonna make me sound like a terrible Albuquerque person. But I think I've only seen like half an episode of Breaking Bad so I appreciate going for the local economy butHilary 28:41so likeKanani 28:42I have seen zero episodes of Breaking BadCourtney 28:45Well, Kanani, stay away from this one do not watch it Kanani, this is not your show. This is not even I'm not even fucking around. LikeKanani 28:53I've been told. I don't do gory. I don't like that kind of stuff. Courtney 28:58no, this is I love it. I love really dark twisted dramas with really good writing. And as a writer, I meticulously watch Breaking Bad to see what they do and how they structure because that the show the writing of it is absolutely flawless. Probably the best written show ever like it I can't think of I mean, we haven't been doing it the kind of serial dramas that the streaming dramas for very long, but it is absolutely going to go down in cinematic history as one of the best pieces of writing ever. You know, like up there Citizen Kane, like the Godfather, where they just absolutely flawless storytelling.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 29:36Definitely. Well, and the way they were able to utilize Albuquerque as its own character in the show and really take advantage of knows like, that's so it's one of those weird shows where I've read a lot about it. And I've taught even like an essay to my college writing students about how it's impacted people's perceptions of New Mexico, but I don't one of the things I've like I've read about it, and I taught a lot about it, but I don't think I've actually like sat down and fully watched it. I usually, you know, sometimes if there's not magic involved, I get easily distracted by a show. Right?Courtney 30:09And that's funny because like the tooth the two shows, kinds of shows that I watch are either like, you know, Game of Thrones or Lord of the Rings high fantasy, or it's Breaking Bad, which is like, absolutely no magick, lots of violence and destruction and the despair of humanity. I don't have a middle ground.Hilary 30:29It's I also I also am like that it's like, I'm like, I like magick like, magicy or like, sometimes fantasy shows. And then I like true crime. And then like everything else I'm like, whatever.Courtney 30:41Oh, but although I was I'm a diehard Schitts Creek and The Office fan, butHilary 30:44Oh, yeah, no, I gotta say that's true.Courtney 30:47For people that are students of the Tarot; shows like Breaking Bad are good because you do see the characters journey. And you do see the different Minor Arcana characters pop up. But that being said, I never shame anybody for not watching a show like Breaking Bad. I don't shame people for missing Game of Thrones. Breaking Bad. The Sopranos. If you don't see the Godfather, I don't shame you for that because I don't feel like people need to see something violent. In order to see good storytelling. It just so happens that these shows have good storytelling although, Breaking Bad like its storytelling, like steamrolls The Sopranos. The Sopranos has great characters and great acting, but lots of plot holes and lots of you know, dead ends to a lot of storylines. Not a single one of those in Breaking Bad. Flawless but nothing wrong with not seeing it.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 31:35Yeah, I like the idea of like the Tarot. In Breaking Bad though. Now that's intriguing to me. I'll have to go back and look at it.Courtney 31:43Yeah, does that mean I could you know what, I probably should do a whole class called Breaking Bad Tarot. You know, this was like five years ago when Breaking Bad was super hot. I totally could have just nailed that. But I was too busy running a Coven. So word to the wise, people, never run a coven. Just kidding, just kidding. Sort of anyway. Well, thank you for this little digression into pop culture. So we're going to ask is, you know, this is coming? Because you've heard our show. How did you know that you were a witch or a magickal person?Dr. Maria DeBlassie 32:13Well, I always kind of grew up in a very spiritually minded and magickally minded household. So I was raised, or I should say, exposed to Catholicism for a hot second in my youth. And then my family moved towards a more natural form of spirituality, which was actually pretty unheard of in my parents generation. So especially in Hispanic community. So it's a pretty big deal that they did that. But I so I always grew up talking about like, dreams, and energy and vibes. And, you know, my mom had this gorgeous garden of herbs and plants and body butters. So it's all this like, kitchen magic, plant magic. And so that was kind of my normal. And it wasn't until I'd like hang out with my friends. And I, I realized, oh, not everyone, like my family, um, but this isn't just the norm for people. So that was always kind of a side of me. And it was one that I kept a little more private or quiet. Especially when I moved to Seattle for graduate school, and it was my first time away from family and all of that. And I sort of realized, you know, there's some real cultural differences. Living in a wider city, you're like a whole other spiritual dimension that I realized, like, I'm operating on this very different wavelength. And I'm realizing that not a lot of people are there. And so there was kind of a divide of like, academic exterior life, and then witchy inside magical life. I moved home, which was actually 10 years ago. Now, this spring, I knew I wanted to come back to Albuquerque, because you know, you just got to love the land of enchantment. And, yeah, I finished that dissertation got full time work at my local community college. And yeah, where I decided I really want to explore this witchy magical side more. And I need to kind of bring this these two halves of me together, you know, I don't want the the woowoo side to always feel like it's in this kind of contained, quiet space. So I started blogging about everyday magic, and it's really funny looking back at it, because I was so scared to even use the term. And then now, you know, cut to me 10 years later, and I'm teaching a class on witchcraft and pop culture at my, you know, local university, and I'm talking about being a Bruja all over social media. And it's so interesting to chart that trajectory of just feeling like nope, This is something that is not separate from my professional identity or my external identity. It's like these things all working union together. So that's really when I moved home, when I felt like I needed to connect my spiritual side more deeply with the rest of me, that it shouldn't be something that's hidden. So that's it's kind of a long story. And I know all these the answers to this question is always a long story. But the short version is that it's always been with me, but I started seriously cultivating and exploring what it means to be a Bruja 10 years ago, it's like, this is a thing. And I want to also respect it, you know, I, as I got older, I really value learn to value, how my parents raised us. Not that I didn't, I just didn't have a sense that there was other ways of doing things. And so I learned to really appreciate what they gave us. That was a tremendous gift. And that was something I wanted to explore more in depth on my own. So that's what I started writing about everyday magick, writing is a huge form of spell casting for me. And I started really thinking like, what does it mean to occupy this identity or to, to embrace it more fully?Courtney 36:23Hmm, it's it to me, I'm feeling like I'm hearing in your story. I almost is like you. And I've just been doing so much, Tarot lately. everything to me is Tarot, because to me, it's feeling like you were on the Fool's Journey that you left home and you came back full circle, you know, and then you found so much of what I'm hearing is that you found so much of your identity when you stepped away from everything you knew. And that's such a classic, such a very human story, and it's so beautiful.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 36:51Absolutely. And I love that you're framing this in terms of Tarot, because I've been doing a tarot deep dive lately, too. And it's absolutely the Fool's journey. It's all these things I took for granted. And I didn't realize were so incredibly powerful and magickal, suddenly, became incredibly important to me when I left, and I have a perspective and recognize what a gift my parents gave me with the way they raised us. And just how much of my identity was really tied into New Mexico and I have this perspective, you know, I spent a lot of time just thinking about wanting to be a little bit more normal or fascinated by you know, my friends who went to church or just seemed like they had a quote, unquote, normal life, whatever that even means. Wait, you know, I even knew what that meant at that time. But now that I'm older I have I have a really profound respect for how I was raised and, and also what it means to carry that forward to really embrace that and become you know, to go from the full to the the empowered in embodied person and I'm trying to think of not it wouldn't be the Knight... it would be the, the Magician, the Magician, there we go. Yeah, yeah, and with one of my favorite cards in the Tarot or I was thinking, in my case, the Queen of Wands is the most deeply to my soul. So the Queen of Wands, yes. So the woman who is a embodies her own empowerment and is aware of the gifts she's been given and can utilize those you know, when you're younger, you kind of don't really know what you're doing.Kanani 38:42I don't know that I would consider myself younger, but I feel I think I still fall into that category. I have no idea of what I'm doing that's that's about how well I follow along with what huh? WhereCourtney 38:59I wasn't gonna say anything. I was gonna let you save some face but apparentlyKanani 39:04I have no faceCourtney 39:10Oh, but speaking of Tarot; sorry, tangent- I haven't even told Hilary and Kanani so I'm gonna tell the story to you. I just got a new tarot deck in the mail. And it's The Nightmare Before Christmas tarot deck. OhKanani 39:23 I hate you. I wanted that.Courtney 39:26It's still available you can buy itKanani 39:28I'm about to! Yeah, but you see when you have it first you know that makes me upset.Courtney 39:36All you do is scroll your phone you shop online so much more that anyway, you go buy your deck and I'm just gonna sit here and talk to Maria Okay, so anyway, so um, brujeria has carved such a large place in the popular imagination I think largely due to appearances in pop culture and movies and, and I would say this was something about my journey me leaving Oregon. And moving to New York City and seeing the effects of, or the influence of a Espiritismo, which is Puerto Rican, or Caribbean spiritualism. On the way people practice all kinds of witchcraft in New York made me realize, like how much of Brujeria which is a little, you know, tends to come from a little further west influences magick here. And so that was, you know, stepping away was able to see that more, but could you tell us what is specifically Brujeria? Dr. Maria DeBlassie 40:28yes, that's such a great question. And it's also kind of a challenging one because it means so many different things to different practitioners. So you have Latin x practitioners of Brujeria, Afro LatinX and then depending on where they're from, like you had mentioned your experiences in New York with different forms of Condor practices. It means a lot of different things. So the short version is that Hold on, I'm like reining in the esoteric DeepakCourtney 41:02take your entire university course it just give it to a thin a two action soundbite, okay. Excuse me, Hilary 41:10Cliff note version. Yeah.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 41:13I'll say was in terms of pop culture, like a lot of examples of Brujeria in popular culture or, you know, conjure or folk magic, from people with marginalized identities, a lot of it isn't actually accurate representation of what we do, right. It's something that's kind of taken and made for like, wider audiences or kind of made for effects of storytelling. So it's exciting. You know, I always think of representations of Voodoo, where there's, you know, everyone loves it, you know, to have the voodoo doll, when it's really not accurately looking at what practitioners do. So a lot of what is represented in Brujeria is not accurate. And that's in part because a lot of Brujeria practices are actually pretty private and practice like within the culture. Um, so it means a lot of different things. And depending on you know, where your cultural orientation is, it can include elements of Catholicism, traditional folk medicine, and like so conjure practices, in my case, Brujeria, for me is a lot about my Mestiza of background And it's a term that basically acknowledges our mixed race identity. So indigenous you're possibly Latin x I'm, I'm learning that I might just be Hispanic and not have the Latin x stuff because the history changes depending on who tells it. But Meztiza is a way of acknowledging that we are products of colonization, particularly in my case like the American Southwest in New Mexico. So you have the Spanish church, you have colonizers coming into Mexico, you have indigenous communities. And all of that has gotten mixed up. So we have of the colonizer and the colonized, and this history of violence and oppression essentially, and a history of cultural assimilation. So for me, being Mestiza is about acknowledging that and also acknowledging that we can't always go back and reclaim things from the past when some records have been lost. Some things I do know about, because we have clear paper trails, other things we don't. And we also have to recognize that sometimes it's not healthy to go back, because there's issues of ancestral hauntings and generational trauma. Wow, yeah, it gets very intense. So you have to decide where to go from here so that you're not perpetuating trauma but but moving forward and two narratives of fulfillment and joy. So to circle back to answering the Brujeria question. For me, it's about honoring that Mestizo identity and saying, I have the power from my various background. So that includes like the small or folk magick and healing and medicine, a little bit of shamanism, my European ancestry through the Italian Strega goes that in me but I can't completely go back and reclaim everything of that so I can honor that. I have that and think about how do I move forward with it? So it's about that it's about acknowledging our divinity as a sexual bodies. You know, the Catholic Church, the Spanish Catholic Church Church has historically not been kind to women or people of color, right? It's about taking that power back, they would call they would label anything that was not something they understood as witchcraft. So taking on the title Bruja is reclaiming that other identity as a form of empowerment, and also finding agency and joy in the liminal space we occupy of not fully belonging to any one culture. So it's, it's folk magick, it's ahh folk medicine, it's trusting in our own ability to carve a new path instead of staying in past traumas. So with all of that, and that's a very messy, complicated answer. ButCourtney 45:54I really appreciate what you're saying, especially about recognizing that you can't go back and that there's a lot of things that are lost, and I meet so many witches that are trying so hard, of all different backgrounds, and, and understanding and they try so hard to pull together what their own ancestral practices might be. And in many ways, they're just not able to do that. And so I really appreciate how you talk so much about a forward thinking approach and acknowledging where you've come from. And taking that magick, what you've got now, for what you know, taking it for what it is, I dunno if face value is the right answer, just say, where where we are in this present moment with that, I guess, is the best way to put it, like, here's where we're at, let's move forward. And I just feel like that I want I would, I would really hope a lot of witches listening can take that into heart and know that that's, that is that's a beautiful thing, you know, to to look forward and not constantly be be trying to do go backward. Dr. Maria DeBlassie 46:57Absolutely. And also to be careful with looking back, you know, it's it's not a fashionable thing to talk about. But, you know, because there's so much emphasis in in communities with marginalized identities about reclaiming. But you do also have to think about the ghosts you're stirring up and might be unearthing that. Like you don't even know about. But you know, I always think of it as, you know, you see the horror movies where people start doing the Ouija board for fun, and then all sorts of, you know, all hell breaks loose,Courtney 47:33or they or they lived that experience, right, Hilary?! when we were, we were 16.Hilary 47:38I have no idea what you're talking about... as I am hiding under a blanket.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 47:45It sounds fun, like, call on the ancestors or go dig here. And it's like, you don't know what you're gonna find, then you have to be careful.Courtney 47:54Or, in our, in our cases, let's call on the really scary ghosts that live in this house. Going to ask them why they're so angry, and then just unleash them. They start manifesting and terrifying the dog that was fun. Dr. Maria DeBlassie 48:06Yeah, like maybe that wasn't a good idea. Courtney 48:09I learned. I learned.Hilary 48:12Just the casual Poltergeist, it's fine. Yeah. Courtney 48:18This is so this is so rich, I'm so mad, we only have an hour to talk to you. I think I need about six years. So when you've got when you've got a moment, when you feel the past calling to you, and you want to, um, you want to connect with it? How are some ways that people might be able to connect with their ancestry? I don't want to say avoid the ghosts. But just take caution, or what are some things to keep in mind? Or best practices around that knowing that, you know, the ghosts and the traumas still live in many cases? Is that a fair question to ask or does that make any sense?Dr. Maria DeBlassie 48:55Yeah, absolutely. And I think that's a really beautiful question. Um, to me, I always, I, there's two things there for me. One, I never forced the energy. So I think sometimes when the ghosts stir up, it's because people might be trying to force that connection, they really want to know, all their gene, you know, all their genealogy and all everything about it. And of course, when they do that, they're really idealizing history and then they stumble on something terrible in their family or whatever. And so, never force the energy and let.. let it speak to you. So if something does come up from, you know, that sort of past, let let the vibes guide you, like, does it feel healthy and life affirming? Or does it feel a little haunted, and I think it'll speak pretty, umm pretty clearly to that. There's also a fair amount of trial and error. So, for the, for the, the, the energetic exchange that happens after that, you know, and early explorations, when I was younger thinking about, well, maybe I can do this thing and be okay. And it would seem fine. And then my energy would be really wonky for about a week or a month or something really weird would happen, and you totally trace it back to what happened when I tried to go back or reconnect to certain parts of my ancestry. Though, you do kind of learn through trial and error. And you realize, you know, well, if I go back in these ways, there, there's a cost to that. I would say, you know, proceed with caution, explore, but let the energy guide you. And sometimes, you know, in my experience, the really beautiful things from my background, have kind of come to me unexpectedly when I haven't been looking for it. It's almost like it's almost like a message from the universe. Like, here's something you need to know. And it's a gift...but when I start looking, then it gets, you know, you hear all the all the ghosts, I think of it. So I really love Monster Hunter fiction, and like, and there's this book, or there's this actual real life. She's a real life, ghost hunter, Vera Van Slyke AndCourtney 51:37what a name! Oh, my God, that is the most perfect ghost hunter name.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 51:42It is it is and she was and she would debunk psychic mediums. But she also believed in ghosts. And so she would go on these ghost cases and Tim Pressel, he is I think it's like his great granddad was basically Vera Van Slyke psychic and recorded things. And so he's republished a lot of that stuff, and they're just fantastic reads. And she gives Vera Van Slyke the best advice for dealing with ghosts, or understanding ghosts? And she says, ghosts are like cats, they never come when you call? Oh, it's amazing. So I think of that with ancestry too, are those things, you know, if you're calling on this good benevolent spirit, you know, I think they're probably out doing their own thing. And they're like, I'm only gonna pop in, if you really need me, I'm not just gonna come in every call. But if you are shouting out, you also don't know what's going to come through that channel that you're opening up. So you want to be careful.Courtney 52:50I've just decided in my next life, if I end up in a Roman Catholic family, when I get confirmed, my confirmation name is going to be Vera Van Slyke! Yes, exactly. In this this lifetime. I chose Joan of Joan of Arc, which is kind of basic. Next year, I need to be back next time, I'm going to be Vera Van Slyke. That's, that's, that's what I'm gonna do. So we have to make her a saint in time for me to reincarnate. So, um, so from what I'm what I'm hearing and understanding, Brujeria is very much a cultural practice. But it also seems like it's quite a personal practice as well, that it sounds like it may be unique to that it varies, that it varies between the pert, like, between different people that practice that are different families. Would that be accurate?Dr. Maria DeBlassie 53:37Absolutely. Because no one cultural mix is alike and what's really empowering and life affirming for one person might be toxic for someone else. So you can go back and reclaim all this stuff. And it's really great for them. And it's like, Yeah, but another person is like, Oh, that's not so healthy for for some Bruja's who have incorporated the Catholic faith into their practice. And that's been great for them. Not so much for me, because of that history of religious oppression. So it's, it's very personal. And I think one of the beautiful things about Brujeria is allowing yourself to explore what your history identity means to you, and also not feeling bound or tied to that history. You have the power to create your own narrative with what you've been given. So you may have started late, but you can always change that narrative.Courtney 54:45Ah, thank you for saying that. Because I think one of the challenges especially with young witches is being so, so focused on what they're destined to be what should be, you know what's supposed to happen instead of remembering that they have agency. And there that I mean, my feeling is there are certain things that perhaps in the great scheme of the books, probably a handful of things saying, Yeah, these three things are gonna happen, Courtney, Hillary and Kanani are gonna be friends at some point, if whether they stay friends or whether they light the world on fire, we don't know, they're going to have to work that out. So just here's the milestone and they can take it from there. You know, I feel like there's certain things that are meant to happen. And then what we do with them is up to us. You know, so I mean, I feel like I am meant to have this six figure book deal, and then I will figure out what to do with it when I get it. SoDr. Maria DeBlassie 55:37one thing I always say is there may be some sort of sense of fate or destiny, but unless you put in the work, it ain't gonna happen. Yes, the universe needs to know that you're, you're working. They don't give anything for free.Kanani 55:55I'm breaking my I'm breaking my microphoneHilary 55:57Kanani is falling apart over there.Kanani 56:00I know. I'm just like, Oh, I'm gonna say oh, no, no, no, I'll break it. That's what I'll do. I'll break it.Courtney 56:05And so you've got a couple of new books coming out that we wanted to hear a little bit more about. So the first one is called Practically Pagan: An Alternative Guide to Magickal Living. Tell us all about that. And is it is it available now?Dr. Maria DeBlassie 56:20It will be out in October. So So Halloween season, and it's part of a Moon Book Series called Practically Pagan. And the idea is, it's a little bit of a play on words. It's, if you're interested in this book, if there's something that draws you to it, then you're practically pagan. So it's kind of, you know, throwing out the word what is that term, I was gonna say, the welcome mat, there we go. Bring out the welcome mat for people who are curious, the idea of committing them. So it's like, You're practically pagan if you're interested in this. And it's also getting to the idea of getting really practical about mystic practices. So my book, An Alternative Guide to Magickal Living is very much about embodying everyday magickal practices. So moving away from the kind of absolutely gorgeous, Instagram worthy, witch lives. Yeah, which I think is beautiful, but I think it's also intimidating, and it makes it feel like you have to have millions of dollars for gorgeous crystals,Courtney 57:34right? I appreciate that. Because I do like the kind of visibility that Instagram has given witchcraft. And I feel like it's also given it a boost of creativity, because people can see different ways to do their spells. But I appreciate also what you're saying is that it can lead to people feeling inadequate, if they're like, well, I'm just kind of using a coffee can. And here, this person here has this really gorgeous crystal vase that they're filling with their good intentions, and I have a coffee kit is that you know what I'd like coffee kit is awesome. So I appreciate that.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 58:11And it's really getting down to the idea of you don't have to spend money, you don't have to somehow become magickally enlightened overnight, or have all the answers. It's really basic ways to tune in with yourself in your energy and your, the energy you're putting out in the world, and your connection to the universe and yourself to manifest that joint. So a lot of the work I do as a witch is about reconnecting with our profound capacity for joy and pleasure, which is that we've all struggled with, like, particularly with this pandemic. You know, it's been a trauma. And so I think a lot of us are struggling to figure out like, how do we move forward, while acknowledging the intensity of what we've all gone through, including living in a hotel room with your whole family while house hunting. How do we move forward into joy? Well, while holding space for so a lot of my work is about learning how to embody that kind of bliss. Which it sounds really wonderful, and we're just joyful, and it is but it also requires work. You know, you have to work through the things that are blocking you or giving you sadness.Courtney 59:33Yes, yes, absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. And you also have work of fiction coming out as well. A novella that's called Weep, Woman, Wheat and that is about La Llorona correct?Dr. Maria DeBlassie 59:46It is. And I am just finishing. Hilary 59:49Oh my gosh! Dr. Maria DeBlassie 59:50Yeah. It's cool. I'm just finishing the draft and it's so it's going off to my editor soon. So I hope to have it out in June. And it is about yeah, the legend of La Llorona. So for people who aren't familiar with it, La Llorona is this woman. Basically, her husband cheats on her and she goes crazy and drowns her kids in the river, and then realizes what have I done. And she spends the rest of her life crying for children by the river trying to reclaim them. Once the legend has it in Mexico, she and other places she hunts the Rio Grande, looking for her kids. And growing up, you know, she's a very frightening urban legend for me, she still haunts me. Because it's like, well, if you're not careful, and you're out too late, La Llerona will mistake you for one of her kids. And umm Courtney 1:00:44This is a great way to keep the kids at home and make them help them.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:00:48Oh, yeah, it was terrifying. And I I and I wrote about this in my first book everyday enchantments were, it was more of a prose poetry book about what it looks like to cultivate a magickal life. But I wrote about La Llorona and there was this tree outside my window at night and it would scrape against my window. Courtney 1:01:08Oh, my god. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Hilary 1:01:11So just slightly terrifying.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:01:14It was always like, La Llorona is wailing and she's scratching to get in. SoHilary 1:01:18Oh, my god, no, Courtney 1:01:20nope, nope. Okay, there goes my sleep tonight.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:01:26But a Weep, Woman, Wheat is about a young woman. And it's kind of like a gothic, creepy fairy tale that takes place in a fictional small town in New Mexico. And in that town, the women are always taken by La Llorona. And it's this young woman who will never happen to me. And one night, she does get taken, but she survives. And so the rest of the story is about how does she break the cycle of La Llorona drowning these women and then making them live through these toxic lives. If she doesn't get completely taken, and the rest of it is about, how does she build this life of joy that she's always been looking for? So it's very metaphor for working through ancestral trauma? Yes, yes. And the very hard work it actually takes but it's possible.Courtney 1:02:25and, and you say this is coming out in June? Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:02:29yes. Courtney 1:02:30Okay, good. Because if it was coming out in in the spooky season, I don't know that I can handle it. But I'm definitely gonna make that a nice, light vacation read for myself. And I will,Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:02:42creepy moments, but there's also a lot of joints. So my fiction is very much. I call it cozy Gothic, because there's always aCourtney 1:02:50Aww, cozy Gothic. Kanani, did you hear that? She just named your brand.Kanani 1:02:56I was just gonna say you just described like everything I love. How did you just sum me up in two words? Although I don't, I'm cozy for myself. I'm not cozy for others. let's specify I keep the cozy for myself. Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:03:14It's unnerving. But it's also always working towards a sense of hope.Courtney 1:03:19All right, I just really appreciate the because I could hear the the where you were going with this with the metaphor of working through your ancestral trauma. And in seeing it through a work of fiction, because I think a lot of people that even if they don't practice magick, or if they don't give themself the space to realize they believe in it, because I think everybody believes in it a little bit. They just don't always necessarily name it, that a work of fiction like that can help them see themselves and go, Oh, this is me. You know, they may not pick up a book like practically pagan, but they might pick up Weep, Woman, Weep. And then they're going to find those things. So Oh, I can't wait. That's so exciting. Hey, witches content warning. This episode's listener question includes a reference to a suicide and to addiction. If you are experiencing thoughts of suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or the trans Lifeline at 877-565-8860. If you'd like to skip past a listener question and discussion, please forward 11 minutes. We have a listener question. I met my first husband when I was 14 and he was 19. We married young we were together over 20 years married for almost 17. We have one beautiful daughter together but divorced when she was three. We split due to his denial of mental health issues and his self medicating. his addiction issues grew with time and he eventually took his own life several years after we divorced. As you can imagine, the relationship had a lot of turmoil and a lot of passion and a lot of love. He is the one that ended our relationship. I would have stayed forever to help him in his struggles if he would have helped himself but he did not want help from me or for anyone. Fast forward, my daughter is now going on 17 and she also listens to your podcast with my recommendation and urging Hello, daughter. We were recently cleaning out a closet and she said, Mom, what is this? She held up a dark purple bottle sealed with wax. The look on my face must have been a clue that I was shocked at what I saw. She then said, Oh my God, is that a spell? I said yes, please put it back and do not touch it. It is mine to deal with I had forgotten about it. It was in a box of candles and knickknacks that I had not opened for several moves to different houses for more than within a decade. Hey, we're working on purging, no judgment. You know, a friend, no judgment here. What she found is a spell jar of sorts I say of sorts because I did the spell when I was 15. And young and inexperienced with no direction in the craft, and totally made it up based on my limited info I had at the time. It is a spell jar Love Spell binding spell for her father from our early relationship. As you can imagine, I still carry some guilt of her father's death, I know it is not my fault. And I could not have stopped him and he made his own choices. But as someone I love deeply, despite all our problems, you always carry that guilt when someone takes their own life. He was my first love and the father of our child, part of me will always love him. So I have to release the spell. He deserves it. We deserve it. My question is, what is the best way? Please give advice on how to set it/him free. The older and now wiser me has so many concerns. What if the spell caused him harm? I honestly think that I had not been able to come to a rational answer to my problem because of my emotional bond. It is blocking me from seeing a clear answer. But the depth of the history of this relationship has me frozen in my tracks. Please tell me what you would do. Thank you. And I'm really thankful that I mean, we essentially this questions we know it was coming. But I our conversation so far has really spoken to what I feel like the basically this is just the perfect question for this episode. And thank you so much for being on the show and helping us with this. So what are your thoughts? I mean, she has this spell jar, it's obviously tied to some some very painful ghosts from the past and to our listener, and I'm so sorry, for your loss for your daughter's loss. Um, but you know, an old spell jar, you know, they they have a shelf life? What do you think, Maria that she ought to do?Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:07:16Well, I, um, I remember reading about this when you when you sent me this info. And what I picked up was that this person has a lot of compassion and a lot of empathy. And I did not, you know, even as they were talking about this spell, it sounded to me like it was a spell meant for really loving and caring and connected to someone. And so I think the universe picks up that energy. So even, especially when we're younger witches, and we aren't always aware of what we're doing. There's a little bit of protection there as, as we're learning. So I think in that case, you know, there's nothing she should feel guilty about. Because there seemed to be like an implication that maybe she did something with the spell that caused you know, what happened with her husband, and I don't think that's the case at all, I think it was absolutely love and wanting to keep her family together and to heal and connect in, in the only way she knew how right searching for that agency and empowerment. So, um, if she's thinking so in that case, you know, I think she should just mentally set herself free for thinking that this spell is doing anything negative. I also think, you know, if she's, it sounds like she needs a really physical concrete way of saying goodbye to that. So I'm a fan of, you know, she can bury it. And just this I bury the pain of this history, or if it feels like she needs to do more of that than that she can actually pour it out into the sink and, like, watch basically, the the heaviness of that time fade away right to release herself and her ex from the trauma of that. But that's, that's my two cents. I would love to hear what y'all think, because I really thought about this. Yeah, no,Hilary 1:09:23I second that. So I, I have before been in the in a place. I mean, not in such a heavy place. And again, I'm so sorry for that tremendous loss. But I think that I've definitely been in a place with spells that were held weight, or were important and going What do I do with this? Like, you know, it's, it's, it's, I'm done with it, and how do I get rid of it in a respectful way, and I've always buried it. Because to me, I mean, I make sure that I'm not putting, you know, like that nothing I'm putting in the earth would cause the earth harm. So like, it's I think it's important to make sure that you're not that you're, you know, not somewhere where An animal could get to something or eat it or that it's not, you know, something depending on what your receptacle is in, but I, but I have always buried that. And it's I've usually I've either dumped out the contents, I usually dump out the contents and bury the contents because then it's like, you're releasing what is in there. So you're not like, contained. It's not contained in there anymore, you're letting that go, but you're letting it go and be reabsorbed into the earth. So for me, that's always my preference. And I and I do that. I've done that as well with manifest manifestation spells where I haven't been able to burn something, and I will, I will put I'll put it in..I'll bury it into the earth and then and let that be. You know, what, like, a release or reabsorption, and a release of that sorrow, in that way?Courtney 1:10:45Yeah. And I think it's important to remember that all spells have an end date. And so my feeling is this spells end date- Probably you probably didn't set one because you were 15. And you didn't know. I mean, how do you know? Yeah, and so to me, I feel like the spell kinda was like, hey, um, I think I, my contract is up. And that's why it appeared when it did. And so it's, it's letting you know that it's time and I feel like there's an opportunity here for you to, you know, wish peace to, and I'm sure that you've already done that. But it's just one more opportunity to do that, too. If you are someone who prays, this is an opportunity to pray for his soul, his soul's healing, some say his souls elevation that that word doesn't fit well with everyone. So I'm just going to tell you what other other people heard of you take for but what you will. But I, to me, I just feel like the spell, the spell knows it's time is over, you're not in a place anymore, where you needed, you clearly needed something from him. And something magickally, at that time in your life, when you were a child, let's remember that! You were a child. And you you did what you had to do in that moment, for whatever your purposes were. So you should not give yourself any, any hard time for doing what needed to be done. But now that need is is over, you know, and so yeah, it's it's time to let it go and give this take this up, take this opportunity again, to, to wish him peace. And, and we certainly, we certainly back you up in that because that's really difficult. But it just there is so much love coming through your words. And,Kanani 1:12:23and I think it's also I think it's also clear that she has a lot of kind of survivor's guilt, I think is kind of what they call it. A lot of times when you when you really have a connection with someone and a bond with someone and they're gone. And you know, and you're not. And I think, you know, one of the things that that Courtney kind of emphasize that I think is really important to remind yourself is that you were a kid, you know, when you did this spell and and you've done a lot of things since then. And I just would hate for that to be something that weighs on someone or that they're concerned about or worried about, because I just don't think that that's, you know, you've certainly done nothing wrong. And you certainly did nothing to make the situation worse, quite the contrary, I'm sure you did everything that could have possibly been been done to have made it better. So you know, please don't don't take it as a sign of, of, you know, something that you did wrong instead kind of like, like Courtney said, Take it as a sign of a reminder of, you know, letting go. And you know, that you did what you you did what you could, but it's it's time to move forward, it's time to move on and let go. And, yeah, I mean, it's just, it's sad. And I think it's just one of those things that i think that i think in all people do it, but I think particularly women, in particular, particularly when when the other party is is well, I think in any situation, regardless of gender, when the other person is an addict. Everything seems to be just kind of amplified to an nth degree. And so I just be very kind to yourself.Hilary 1:14:07Yeah, be kind to yourself and know that I know, it's very easy for us to, like worry, or think, you know, could we have done or could we impact and I hear that and what the listener is saying? And the answer is no, you can't like you know, these things. Have, you can do everything right in any scenario and you can't prevent things like this, unfortunately.Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:14:29Yeah. And I love the idea of, you know, the spell bottle appearing to you now, like almost as many years to like, it's, I mean, it's I think, you know, I love what you all said about that. It's, it's time for closure, and you you are allowed to release release that experience, you know, to acknowledge that it wasn't an easy one but there was still a tremendous amount of love there and you can appreciate the love. Acknowledge the pain but not not be haunted by could have would have should of's. I think you did the best you could have given the situation.Courtney 1:15:16Yeah, maybe it's a spell, maybe it's spell you and your daughter can do together because she's not much older than you were when you did the spell. So to me, this is really beautiful cycle. And if you're if you're all comfortable that I think that would be a lovely thing to do is you two end the spell together. So just a thought.Hilary 1:15:34I love that. You know,Courtney 1:15:36anyway, let us know how it turned out. We will be thinking of you. In the meantime, Maria, what's next for you? And where can people get your incredible books; Moonbooks is a great company by the way friends, if you're not familiar with them, definitely check them out. They've got a lot of wonderful resources. And and yeah, where can people follow your work and stay in touch with you?Dr. Maria DeBlassie 1:15:55And yes the Moonbooks is awesome. I love them so much. Yes, so you can find me on my website and on social media. I'm on Instagram, @mdeblassie.writer but, if you go to my website, you can find it all there. And since we talked about Tarot, I've actually started My Bruja's Guide to Tarot on YouTube. Yeah, it's really fun. And I talk about basically I read the Tarot through the lens of helping us heal our relationship to hope, pleasure in the magick of everyday life. So, it's a little bit more of that. Come on, check that out. Courtney 1:16:37All right, well, okay, well, I'm very, very thankful you came here. I just got like, I feel like I've been kissed on my soul today. So I feel I really appreciate this. I know this episode's gonna mean a lot to a lot of people. And so thank you, Maria, for being with us. (Exit Music) 1:16:53Thank you all so much for listening! If you want to support the show, the best way is to subscribe and spread the word. Please also consider leaving us a rating and review us on Apple Podcasts. You can also buy us a coffee or check out our merch on our Etsy store. For bonus content, become a supporter on Patreon. We are on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. For show notes, audio transcript, or to ask us a question to answer on a future episode, go to . Until then, keep moting that shit! Get Maria's books, follow her on YouTube and we will talk to you all next week! All Three 1:16:53Bye everybodyDr. Maria DeBlassie 1:16:53it was such a delight! Bye! so you're okay with us calling you Maria or do you prefer Dr. De Blassie? Oh, Maria is perfect. Courtney 1:17:51Okay, just wanted you've earned it. You've earned the title and so you can use it whenever you want.Hilary 1:17:56I would literally use that every day. I'd be like, What's your name? And I'd be like Dr. Hillary Whitmore.Courtney 1:18:02I would call you Dr. Ri is what I would call you. I would never call you.Hilary 1:18:07Why are you like this? ................
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