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Et Plagieringseventyr(A Plagiarism Carol)[scene opens with a male professor talking to his male student]PROFESSOR: [translated] This paper has to be turned in on the 29th.KAJ: [translated] Okay, I'll start right away.[a group of students suddenly appear and, as the scene is super-imposed over a giant picture of a calendar, they carry him off and start partying ... Kaj wakes up next to a pretty female student]KAJ: [translated] I really have to write that paper ... [the female student leans in close, as the camera focuses in on her cleavage]FEMALE STUDENT: [translated] But it's not due for a long time ... [Kaj smiles and moves in to kiss her, but he suddenly falls down (again super-imposed over the image of a giant calendar) and lands - fully clothed - at a desk in the library]KAJ: Phew ... [he looks down at a paper entitled "Logikk Og Kunstig Intelligens" ("Logic and Artificial Intelligence"), so he types the phrase into Google Norge and - after looking around to make sure no ones sees him - copies and pastes the results from the website "folk.uio.no/herman/agora.html" into his computer ... This action causes the lights to flicker and the ghostly figure of an old man to appear before him]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] Oooo, this reeks of plagiarism.KAJ: [looks on in shock]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] I am the ghost of plagiarism, James ... [James Grieg the Ghost of Plagiarism turns and looks directly into the camera]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] Based on Charles Dickens, 1843.[the ghost turns his attention back to Kaj]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] And I am here to tell you what will happen if you plagiarize.[he takes his hand, as they disappear and are transported to a point in time where Kaj is handing in his paper]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: Heh heh.FUTURE KAJ: [translated] Hi, I want to turn in this paper.[the doors suddenly fly open behind him, as armed police officers surround him]POLICE OFFICER: [translated] Down! Down! Down![the future version of Kaj is forced to the ground]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] First and foremost, it is humiliating to be caught cheating.[cut to Future Kaj being led away in handcuffs, as a female passerby spits on the ground in front of him]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] In addition, you can fail the course and risk getting expelled from the university.[cut to a professor setting Future Kaj's diploma on fire with a lighter, then having him thrown off campus by security]KAJ: [translated] Okay, I get the point ... but not everyone is caught.GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] Heh heh, don't be so sure. The University has a secret weapon.[cut to Kaj and the ghost floating through a secret underground facility containing a giant robot]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] UiB has an electronic Ephorus program that checks all papers. You're pretty lucky if you get away with cheating.[the robot is activated, and (switching to the machine's POV) one of the scientists holds up a paper as "Ephorus Plagrism Detector On" and "Scanning: Godkjent" ("Approved") appear on screen]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] So you have to ask yourself one question ... [the camera zooms in on the ghost's face, as he speaks in English]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya ... punk?[the robot suddenly turns and focuses on the ghost (again, from the robot's POV) as "Plagiat Oppdaget" flashes in red on the screen]EPHORUS: [translated] Plagiarism detected! Dirty Harry, 1974![the Ephorus robot begins firing its laser beams (with "Terminate" flashing on the screen) as the scientists - and Kaj - run away][cut to a giant meeting room - with a computer monitor reading "DefCon 1" in the background - where Kaj and James have been transported]MAN: We've got a code red in Sector 47, it's getting out of control!GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] And have you ever thought of how far you can go if you write a good paper without cheating?[they turn and stare at the man speaking, who is looking at the generals sitting at the table]MAN: How do we stop this thing?GENERAL: There is only one man who can save us now ... We need the world's leading expert on artificial intelligence![a "24"-style montage of shots is shown (including a scene of the Ephorus robot running amuk in a major city), then cut to the future version of Kaj (wearing a suit and tie) taking off his sunglasses and addressing the generals in English]FUTURE KAJ: I suggest we create a GUI interface in Visual BASIC ... MAN: Ya hear that? Do it! Do it now![cut to a closeup of the robot as its head explodes, then back to the meeting room as everyone stands up and applauds Kaj]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] What you achieve by doing it right is a unique knowledge and competence in your field.[cut to Future Kaj being surrounded by reporters and photographers]FUTURE KAJ: GUI interface and Visual BASIC ... [cut to news footage of Future Kaj standing next to Barack Obama, with the words "Honoring World Saviour Kaj Saether, Washington DC, May 28th 2015" appearing on screen]KAJ: [translated] Yes, this looks great! But I don't know how to do it right.GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] There is a fantastic place ... [the ghost turns and looks directly into the camera]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] Where you can find the information that you need.[cut to James (now a living librarian) joined by several dancers and singers inside the library, as they perform a musical number]CHORUS: [translated] If you quote ... [Darth Vader is shown walking through the library, with "Star Wars 1977" appearing on screen]CHORUS: [translated] Use ideas ... [James is shown dancing in a red leather jacket, with "Michael Jackson's Thriller 1983" appearing on screen]CHORUS: [translated] Or expand on the work of others ... [a man holds up a sign reading "PeerGynt 2"]CHORUS: [translated] You must refer, in the text ... [a heavy metal band is shown, as the lead singer bites the head off a bat, with "Ozzy Osbourne 1982" appearing on screen]CHORUS: [translated] To where you got your idea![James points to a group of people holding signs that spell out "To Be Or Not To Be, Shakepeare"]CHORUS: [translated] This is a quote ... [some of the signs are flipped so that "Shakespeare" is now blank]CHORUS: [translated] This is plagiarism ... [James points to a poster on one of the bookshelves, which reads "Er Dod Hevder, Phyllis Chesler"]CHORUS: [translated] This is correct ... [the part of the poster which reads "Phyllis Chesler" is ripped away, as a man leaning against the bookshelf grabs one of the female singer's breasts]CHORUS: [translated] This is suspect![cut to a group of cheerleaders performing in the middle of the library]CHEERLEADERS: [translated] Go citation! Go go citation![they cheer, as James leads a marching band through the library]CHORUS: [translated] Finally you make a list, where you write down all the sources you have used.[several quick shots of the performers are cycled through]CHORUS: [translated] If something is still unclear ... [the librarians all begin marching towards the camera]CHORUS: [translated] Take a look at our guidelines, they are on the Internet, log on to our web page and see![balloons are released, as "sokogskriv.no" appears on screen, then James (back in his incorporeal form) floats into view]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] Are you ready to write now?[cut to Kaj back in the library, typing away on his computer, while James hovers above him]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] Yes, now you have your reference techniques in order.KAJ: [translated] And print![he hits the print button]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [translated] You must be tired now. I can turn in your paper for you.[he takes the paper and floats towards the professor's office, but he stops and crosses out Kaj's name on the title page before writing "James" in pen underneath it]GHOST OF PLAGIARISM: [turns to the camera] Heh heh heh ... ................
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