Leadership Tips for Troop Leaders - Building Girls of ...

[Pages:14]Leadership Tips for

Troop Leaders

Brought to you by

& Girl Scouts of the USA

Join us to Ban Bossy

When it comes to girls and ambition, the pattern is clear: girls are discouraged from leading. When a little boy asserts himself, he's called a "leader." Yet when a little girl does the same, she risks being branded "bossy"--a precursor to words like "aggressive," "angry," and "too ambitious" that plague strong female leaders. Calling girls bossy is one of many things we do to discourage them from leading. It's no wonder that by middle school, girls are less interested in leadership roles than boys, a trend that continues into adulthood.

and Girl Scouts of the USA are kicking off Ban Bossy, a public service campaign to encourage leadership and achievement in girls. With the help of Girls Leadership Institute co-founder Rachel Simmons and the Girl Scout Research Institute, we've developed practical tips to help all young women flex their leadership muscles, in ways big and small.

The girl with the courage to raise her hand becomes the woman with the confidence to assert herself at work. As troop leaders, there are small changes each of us can make that will have a big impact on girls' confidence and ambitions.

The time to start building female leaders is now.We hope you'll join us to Ban Bossy--and encourage girls to lead.

By middle school, girls are 25% less likely than boys to say they like taking the lead.

Source: Sloan Study of Youth and Social Development, 1992--1997 1

JOIN US TO Post "I will #banbossy" to your social media channels and BAN BOSSY visit to take the pledge and learn more.

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Far too many girls are backing away from leadership opportunities, and many who do want to lead don't believe they have what it takes. Fortunately, through Girl Scouting, girls hone their leadership skills every day. They're able to work to achieve their goals surrounded by people who want to see them succeed.

When I meet with girls, it's clear they're watching the women in their lives to learn who they themselves can become. Girl Scout troop leaders are some of girls' earliest role models. Through your guidance and role modeling, you play a special--and at times a daunting--part in helping girls become strong, capable leaders.

Research suggests that all-girl environments like Girl Scouts can be beneficial for girls' self-esteem and performance at home, school, and beyond. In all-girl spaces, girls are free to learn and thrive in an environment where they feel safe to speak freely, take healthy risks, take on challenges, and be themselves2.

Together, we can make Girl Scouts the place where girls experience trust with one another, the fun of teaming up to try something new, and the freedom to speak directly and confidently to their peers. And when girls can speak up and lean in without the fear of being called bossy, they practice leadership skills that will serve them throughout their lives.

--Andrea Bastiani Archibald, Ph.D. Chief Girl Expert, GSUSA

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Girl Scout troop leaders are some of girls' earliest

role models.

For more ideas for supporting the girls in your life, we recommend you read our Leadership Tips for Girls at girls-tips.

DID YOU KNOW?

92% 21% Ninety-two percent of girls believe they can learn the skills required to lead--yet only twenty-one percent believe they already possess them.

Source: Girl Scout Research Institute, 2008 3

1. Develop Relationships

with Your Girls

THE SITUATION > Relationships empower girls. When they feel connected to the adults in their life, they are more resilient and courageous4. Younger girls in particular are likely to look up to their Girl Scout leaders, so make your interactions with them count!5 THE SOLUTION > Build personal connections with the girls in your troop. Ask them how school is going or what they're listening to, reading, or watching. Use girls' names when acknowledging their ideas. When girls feel comfortable and connected in a group, they are more likely to take healthy risks and try new things.

DID YOU KNOW?

Nearly two-thirds of elementary school girls say they want an adult to help them learn to be a better leader.

Source: Girl Scout Research Institute, 2008 6

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2. Be Conscious of the Way You

and They Talk

THE SITUATION > Girls learn early that too much confidence can get them ostracized, and you often hear the proof in the way they communicate. Many girls start sentences with apologies ("I'm not sure this is right, but...") or turn powerful sentences into questions ("Martin Luther King was a civil rights leader?"). Some cock their heads, play with their hair, or cover their mouths while speaking, using phrases like "kind of" and "sort of" to weaken their convictions. These phrases can become habits and hinder a girl's ability to speak in a direct manner later on.

THE SOLUTION > Notice how you communicate with your troop and avoid hedging or softening your opinions with disclaimers or apologies. Be conscious of how your girls speak as well. If you observe a girl falling into one of these communication pitfalls, privately point it out and explain how it undermines the point she's making.

DID YOU KNOW?

The confidence gap starts young: Between elementary school and

high school, girls' self-esteem drops 3.5 times more than boys'.

Source: American Association of University Women, 1991 7

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3. Teach Girls to Respect

Their Feelings

THE SITUATION > Girls learn early on that being liked and avoiding conflict--even when they're upset--can win social status and rewards. Many girls are told to "get over" their feelings or to stop being "so sensitive." A girl's ability to recognize and respect her feelings, and to speak up about them, is a vital ingredient to developing healthy personal authority and confidence.

THE SOLUTION > Teach your girls to respect themselves by letting them know it's okay to feel whatever it is they feel. They may not like all their feelings, but they're an important part of who they are; just as we have to take care of our bodies, we also have to take care of our feelings. Show them by example: avoid denying, second-guessing, or questioning their feelings with phrases like "It's not a big deal" or "Don't overreact." When they're ready to share with others, be realistic with them about the challenges of speaking up in a world that still expects girls to be nice above all. Sometimes we have to speak up just to show we believe we should be heard, even if the result isn't what we hoped for.

4. Teach Girls to

Handle Conflict

THE SITUATION > Girls learn from watching the ways women communicate and resolve conflict. As girls navigate challenges in the troop, they look to their leaders for cues on how to handle difficult relationships. The power of our example can be both exciting and intimidating.

THE SOLUTION > Avoid indirect communication like gossip or texting as a way to resolve your own conflicts. Instead, model direct and honest communication with your peers and the girls. Remember, your troop is watching and learning. Explain to the girls that conflict is an inevitable part of relationships and teamwork--it's the way we handle it that matters. And remind them that Girl Scouting is about uplifting and supporting one another, not bringing others down.

ACTIVITY

Learn to Be Direct Help girls learn how to resolve conflict by teaching them to use I-Statements. See the attached troop activity for an introduction to I-Statements and step-by-step exercises for practicing them.

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5. Avoid Language

That Holds Girls Back

THE SITUATION > Sometimes the words we use, even unintentionally, can make it harder for girls to take risks or try something new. For example, calling a girl "bossy"-- a word we rarely use for boys--sends the message that girls should not speak up. These words can silence a girl during her most formative years. THE SOLUTION > Constructive criticism is a vital part of learning and growing, but the way it's delivered can make the difference between motivating and shaming a girl. Take care to avoid references to gender in any of your feedback, and avoid using words that disproportionately label or stereotype girls or other groups. Girls use language that reinforces gender stereotypes, too ("Girls aren't good at math"; "All girls care about are makeup and clothes"). When they do, steer the conversation toward a teachable moment for your group: explain what a stereotype is, how it limits us, and what evidence exists to challenge it. For example, ask your girls to give you an example of someone who defies the stereotype ("Who here knows a girl who's good at math?" "Do you know girls who care about school more than how they look?").

DID YOU KNOW?

Girls are twice as likely as boys to worry that leadership roles will

make them seem "bossy."

Source: Girl Scout Research Institute, 2008 8

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6. Encourage Girls to Speak Up

THE SITUATION > Research shows that women often underestimate their abilities, while men often overestimate theirs.9 In the same vein, girls often fear being wrong. As a result, some girls don't speak up unless they're 100 percent sure they have the right answer, while others ruminate over the perfect answer. Unfortunately, the time spent figuring out the right thing to say--or a response that will be popular with others--can delay or even suppress their true feelings.

THE SOLUTION > After you ask a question, pause for a few moments, even if it's awkward, to give girls more time to contribute. Help girls find their voice by starting discussions that don't require factual responses. Ask the girls in your troop to adopt and hold a position or wrestle with an idea together. Start your question with "There's no right answer," and remind the girls that discussion leads to important questions and insights. If there are quieter girls in the group, privately take them each aside and encourage them to contribute.

ACTIVITY

Encourage Girls to Speak Up Divide the girls into pairs. Have each pair designate an "A" and "B" person, and give each pair a tennis ball. Ask A's to throw the ball and say a word that names something they're interested in--say, dogs or music or cooking. When B catches the ball, she has to throw it back and ask a question about that word. It could be anything, like "What's your favorite breed of dog?" or "Who's your favorite artist?" After a few times, switch the A and B roles. This exercise works particularly well for an opening ceremony for a Girl Scout meeting. It warms girls up and challenges them to develop the capacity to think on their feet and ask questions. BONUS EXERCISE: Try the same activity, but ask the girls to express an opinion about the word instead of asking a question about it.

DID YOU KNOW?

Girls are typically called on less in class than boys--so it's important teach them

to get their hands up!

Source: American Association of University Women, 1992 10

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