Personal Persuasive Essay - English 9



Personal Persuasive Essay - English 9

ASSIGNMENT: Construct a personal persuasive essay which responds to one of the prompts below. No outside sources or research will be used. A first-person voice (I, me, my) is acceptable if the writer is introducing personal examples; however, the writer should avoid unnecessary or redundant use of first person.

REQUIREMENTS: Six-paragraphs, 2 to 4 pages, typed, Times New Roman, follows MLA format

1. In today's world, high-stakes standardized tests play a huge role in America's schools. In response to federal laws like No Child Left Behind and Race to the Top, states require schools to test children in a wide variety of subjects and to report out results. These results may be used to evaluate the performance of schools, teachers, and students. Some people claim that the use of high-stakes tests helps keep schools accountable and improves student achievement. Others say that the use of high-stakes testing narrows the curriculum and forces teachers to "teach to the test." Should the government use high-stakes tests to assess student performance and to judge the performance of school systems? Write an essay in which you support your opinion.

OR

2. Many states and schools have been mandating (requiring) that students perform a certain number of hours of community service prior to graduation. Some people believe that this is a good idea because it helps students learn the value of service and teaches kids to offer aid to their fellow human beings. Others object because they believe it is wrong to require anyone to perform "volunteer" work. Should schools require that students complete community service in order to graduate? Write an essay in which you support your opinion.

OR

3. Some high schools in the United States have considered creating separate classrooms for male and female students in subjects such as mathematics and science. Some educators think separate classes will be beneficial because students will be less distracted from learning. Other educators think having separate classes for females and males will not be beneficial because it will seem to support stereotypes about differences in ability between males and females. In your opinion, should high schools create separate classes for male and female students? Write an essay in which you support your opinion.

Which topic did you choose?

Explain why you chose this topic in two-three (2-3) sentences:

CSW4: Supporting Arguments - No Textual Support - ACT-style Writing

| |6 - persuasive / effective |5 - competent/ reasonable |4 - adequate |3 - progressing |2 - weak |1 |

| | | | | | | |

|Ideas and |Development of ideas is ample, |Development of ideas is specific |Development of ideas is adequate, |Development of ideas is limited|The essay is thinly developed. |The essay is minimally |

|Content |specific, and logical. Most |and logical. Most ideas are |with some movement between general|and may be repetitious, with |If examples are given, they are|developed. The essay may |

| |ideas are fully elaborated. |elaborated, with clear movement |statements and specific reasons, |little, if any, movement |general and may not be clearly |include excessive |

| | |between general statements and |examples, and details. |between general statements and |relevant. The essay may include|repetition of the writer's|

| |The essay addresses complexity |specific reasons, examples, and | |specific reasons, examples, and|extensive repetition of the |ideas or of ideas in the |

| |by examining different |details. |The essay may show some |details. |writer's ideas or of ideas in |prompt. |

| |perspectives on the issue, or | |recognition of complexity by | |the prompt. | |

| |by evaluating the implications |The essay shows recognition of |providing some response to |The essay may acknowledge a | |There is no |

| |and/or complications of the |complexity by partially evaluating|counter-arguments to the writer's |counter-argument to the |There is little or no |counter-argument to the |

| |issue, or by fully responding |the implications and/or |position. |writer's position, but its |recognition of a |writer’s position. |

| |to counter-arguments to the |complications of the issue, or by | |development is brief or |counter-argument to the | |

| |writer’s position. |responding to counter-arguments to|The introduction and conclusion |unclear. |writer's position. |If present, an |

| | |the writer's position. |are clear and somewhat developed. | | |introduction and |

| |The introduction and conclusion| | |An introduction and conclusion |An introduction and conclusion |conclusion are minimal. |

| |are effective, clear, and well |The introduction and conclusion | |are clearly discernible but |are discernible but minimal. | |

| |developed. |are clear and generally well | |underdeveloped. | | |

| | |developed. | | | | |

|Organization | | | | | |There is little or no |

| |The organization of the essay |The organization of the essay is |The organization of the essay is |The organization of the essay |There is some indication of an |evidence of an |

| |is clear: the organization may |clear, although it may be |apparent but predictable. |is simple. Ideas are logically |organizational structure, and |organizational structure |

| |be somewhat predictable or it |predictable. | |grouped within parts of the |some logical grouping of ideas |or of the logical grouping|

| |may grow from the writer's | |Some evidence of logical |essay, but there is little or |within parts of the essay is |of ideas. |

| |purpose. Ideas are logically |Ideas are logically sequenced, |sequencing of ideas is apparent, |no evidence of logical |apparent. | |

| |sequenced. |although simple and obvious |although most transitions are |sequencing of ideas. | |Transitions are rarely |

| | |transitions may be used. |simple and obvious. | |Transitions, if used, are |used. |

| |Most transitions reflect the | | |Transitions, if used, are |simple and obvious, and they | |

| |writer's logic and are usually | | |simple and obvious. |may be inappropriate or | |

| |integrated into the essay. | | | |misleading. | |

| | | | | |. | |

|Conventions | | | | | | |

| |There are few, if any, errors |There may be a few errors, but |There may be some distracting |Errors may be distracting and |Errors may be frequently |Errors may be frequently |

| |to distract the reader. |they are rarely distracting. |errors, but they do not impede |may occasionally impede |distracting and may sometimes |distracting and may |

| | | |understanding. |understanding. |impede understanding. |significantly impede |

| | | | | | |understanding. |

|Style / Word Choice| | | | | |Sentence structure and |

| |The essay shows a good command |Language is competent. |Language is adequate, with some |Language shows a basic control.|Sentence structure and word |word choice are simple. |

| |of language. | |sentence variety and appropriate | |choice are usually simple. | |

| | |Sentences are somewhat varied and |word choice. | | | |

| |Sentences are varied and word |word choice is sometimes varied | |Sentences show a little variety| | |

| |choice is varied and precise. |and precise. | |and word choice is appropriate.| | |

| | | | | | | |

| | | | | | | |

|Focus / Position |The essay shows a clear |The essay shows a clear |The essay shows an understanding |The essay shows some |The essay shows a weak |The essay shows little or |

| |understanding of the task. The |understanding of the task. The |of the task. The essay takes a |understanding of the task. The |understanding of the task. The |no understanding of the |

| |essay takes a position on the |essay takes a position on the |position on the issue and may |essay takes a position on the |essay may not take a position |task. If the essay takes a|

| |issue and may offer a critical |issue and may offer a broad |offer some context for discussion.|issue but does not offer a |on the issue, or the essay may |position, it fails to |

| |context for discussion. |context for discussion. | |context for discussion. |take a position but fail to |convey reasons to support |

| | | |Focus on the specific issue in the| |convey reasons to support that |the position. |

| |A clear focus on the specific |Focus on the specific issue in the|prompt is maintained throughout |Focus on the general topic is |position, or the essay may take| |

| |issue in the prompt is |prompt is maintained. |most of the essay. |maintained, but focus on the |a position but fail to maintain|Focus on the general topic|

| |maintained. | | |specific issue in the prompt |a stance. |is usually maintained, but|

| | | | |may not be maintained. | |focus on the specific |

| | | | | |Focus on the general topic is |issue in the prompt may |

| | | | | |maintained, but focus on the |not be maintained. |

| | | | | |specific issue in the prompt | |

| | | | | |may not be maintained. | |

| | | | |

|Presentation |Perfect |Nearly Perfect - small errors |UNACCEPTABLE |

*Holistic Score = ____ / 6 Grade Conversion = 6 = 100%, 5 = 90%, 4 = 80%, 3 = 70%, 2 = 60%

* Teachers weigh "Ideas and Content" more heavily when determining a final score. The final score is not an average: it is a holistic score based on the comments circled.

Doe 1

John Doe

Mr. Instructor

Composition and Literature

5 May 2011

More Time Equals More Success

The Senior Itch—the incurable chaffing all young American students crave to scratch. The cure? Graduation. As teenagers progress through their high school years, growing with wisdom and maturity, they all yearn for freedom. Yet what young people desire most is not always what is best for them. Although most won't want to admit it, extending their high school career to five years would make an important and beneficial impact on our future. With the four years that are currently provided, there is not enough time for motivated students to accomplish their goals before college. Extending the high school experience would provide students with more time to participate in extra-curricular activities, to improve their academic performance, and to pursue non-school related goals.

Many colleges look closely at how an applicant used his or her four years of high school. Students who take leadership roles, show loyalty to an organization, and develop a well-rounded personality are appealing to the most elite educational institutions. Often, students desire leadership positions in numerous extra-curricular organizations but face limits on the number of offices they may hold at one time. Even if a school doesn't limit students' involvement, students eventually reach the limits of what a twenty-four-hour day can hold. Too often, students cannot participate as much as they want in as many extra-curricular activities as they want because there just isn't time. With an extra year of high school, those involved in more than one activity could successfully find the time to lead and

Doe 2

contribute to each one. Colleges would see a longer, more developed individual's resume that included a time for each of their interests. The organizations would benefit from stronger student participation, and the students would be recognized for their true efforts as well.

Along with the struggle to gain leadership roles and become the well-rounded students colleges desire, the task of maintaining a respectable grade point average during high school is a challenge for many students. It is difficult to be involved in activities of interest while still keeping high grades. However, colleges don't consider this when they seek applicants with high grade point averages in their admissions pool. Elongating the span of high school would allow more students with both grades and activities on their agenda to spend more time focusing on each separate interest. Rather than feeling forced to crunch a large block of "weighted" classes together in hopes of elevating their GPA, students would find more time to spread out their difficult classes and make the most of every single year. With less pressure and more time, grades would improve for all dedicated students, as would the enjoyment of studying those subjects and the increased retention of what they learned in those classes.

Education aside, many high school students find that four years is not enough time to accomplish their varied goals. For instance, a student may desire a job in addition to school. The money they earn may help pay their way through college. With such a short preparation period before college, they can hardly be expected to make a successful life for themselves without the proper funds. Also, many students are interested in community service prior to attending college but find they do not have enough time in the four-year high school period. Colleges are drawn to students with a rich assortment of community service and evidence of responsibilities such as holding a job, but students have a hard time finding the hours to put into these tasks.

Supporters of the status quo claim that there is already plenty of time for students to accomplish all of their goals if they just work hard enough. Of course, there are lazy students

Doe 3

who won't take advantage of a five-year experience. However, this is not true of the vast majority of teenagers. Most young people understand that they need to take challenging classes and participate in multiple activities if they are going to get the most out of high school. Unfortunately, the current four-year system simply doesn't provide students with ample time to truly excel in school. Telling students to just "work harder" may feel good, but it simply isn't realistic.

High school is the foundation of the rest of young people's lives. Like money in the bank, the investment of an additional year when they are young can make all the difference. With the additional time, motivated students would be able to become more involved in their schools, boost their grades, and find the time for a job and community service. Colleges admire these attributes, and for the sake of high-schoolers' acceptance into these institutions, more time should be provided for their endeavors. High school students work hard toward their futures. Another year would help ensure their success.

* adapted from a model essay provided by the

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