The Core Skill of Questioning



The Core Skill of Questioning

Why ask questions?

There are many reasons for asking questions:

• To establish rapport – easy to answer questions help to put people at ease

• To set the style – show that you are interested in what they have to say

• To obtain information – a basic use of questions

• To ascertain options – including objections

• To explore feelings – something often overlooked or avoided

• To gauge reception – are they hearing you accurately?

• To explore reactions – how are they responding to your comments?

• To stimulate ideas – what do they think might be done?

• To generate alternatives – what else can they suggest?

• To investigate inconsistencies – how do they reconcile discrepancies?

• To check your own understanding of what they have said

• To check out prior knowledge – what do they know already?

Question Types

There are several ways of classifying question types. An underlying theme is the level of openness of the question. We can view questions as if they were on a scale, from open to closed.

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Open questions:

The more open, the more is left to the coachee (or person being questioned) to decide how much (or how little) to say. Very open questions even give them the choice of subject matter, as when we ask about their previous experience without specifying a particular aspect of their work.

Open questions tend to give control of the conversation to the coachee; they determine when to stop talking. Open questions invite longer responses from the coachee, although they may still opt to keep their responses short, e.g. “what did you do as a result of the last coaching session?” may get an extended or a one word answer!

Open questions are useful for getting the coachee to talk and therefore to think about:

– their feelings and behaviour,

– how they might need to change,

– where they need to get help support, and so on.

Open questions invite them to think for themselves by talking aloud. They also allow the coach to check that the coachee understands what is required.

However, keep in mind that although open questions encourage the coachee to talk more, too open a question may leave them floundering. “What has your performance been like over the whole of your working life?” – might be a big question to answer.

Avoid the use of questions beginning with “why”. This can increase the feeling of being put on the spot or on the defensive - perhaps because it can be associated with being a child who has displeased the grown-ups. Remember when you did something simply because it appealed to you but the adults objected – so they said in an angry tone “why did you do that?”. “Why” questions invite the other person to justify their actions. This moves them out of the thinking mode and into defensive mode. They might also be fantasising that you think they did the wrong thing. Instead of asking “why did you do that?” ask “What influenced your decision?”

Closed questions:

Closed questions restrict the coaching session in some way. The intended boundaries are indicated or implied by the question. Closed questions keep the control with the coach; the coachee is expected to stop talking once they have said enough to answer the question. Closed questions tend to invite shorter, more focussed responses.

A closed question may still receive an open answer, as when we enquire “Have you worked here for long?” and they launch into a lengthy description of all the jobs they have held and how much they have enjoyed each one. Closed questions are useful for checking whether the person knows specific facts and to make sure that we have communicated effectively with them.

Multiple-choice questions are also a form of closed questions. In this case, we offer the coachee options to choose from, such as “would you say that you have a general problem with your job or is it just with budgeting?” The problem with this type of question is that the coachee may simply guess the answer. Multiple-choice questions should be used only for establishing definite things - like whether someone would prefer tea or coffee.

Leading questions:

Leading questions are another specific form of closed questions. In this case, the answer is contained in the question. For example, you might say, “You are going to sort out this conflict issue, aren’t you?.” Leading questions are not true questions, because the coachee knows the answer you want to hear. For that reason, they are generally unhelpful as they do not allow you to collect information nor do they encourage free thinking in the coachee. A leading question may be useful at the start of a conversation with a nervous coachee just to encourage them to talk – in that case, your question needs to be easy to answer such as “I expect you would like a coffee before we start wouldn’t you?”

Paraphrasing:

One form of words that is often mistaken for a leading question is a paraphrase. The difference is that the coach does not put the content into the paraphrase – instead they are playing back the context to the coachee. Paraphrasing is invaluable; it allows the coach to hear in different words what they have just said and will often stimulate new awareness. Research has shown that most people do far too little paraphrasing, perhaps because we were made to feel foolish at school if we asked the teacher if we correctly understood what they were saying to us. Paraphrasing is the best way to ensure that misunderstandings are identified. It is also a powerful way of letting someone know we are really attending to what they are saying.

Reflecting:

Sometimes we ask a question without actually articulating the question; instead we use reflecting skills. There is an entire counselling approach that rests on the ability to echo one or two significant words from each comment by the client, with the skill being in the selection of which words! This technique might seem a bit strange if used in a coaching session but there will be occasions when an echo from the coach is all that is needed to prompt the coachee to continue with their train of thought.

Examples:

|“I have changed jobs recently and I feel so unsettled” |“What would help you to feel more settled?” |

|“I am really worried about my relationship with my boss” |“What would help you to feel more relaxed in that |

| |relationship?” |

|“I find it impossible to deal with conflict, I hate conflict” |“What would you need to change for you to be able to deal with |

| |conflict?” |

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