What’s the difference between the conversational style



What’s the difference between the conversational style

of men and women in Japan and America?

Yuko Kondo 011060

Introduction

When people talk, how can they communicate and understand each other, even if they have different cultures or they are different gender? Each person has a different conversational style. When speakers from different parts of countries, talk to each other, it’s likely that their words will not be understood exactly as they were meant.

Questionnaire

-Aim to find out the gender difference to understand how gender

interacts with communication styles in daily life

to see if it is true about men and women’s differences what many

researchers say

-Subject 78 subjects from 18 to 61, 35 men and 43 women

-Test Design I picked up 20 questions from D.Tannen’s book.

People answered their behaviors of when talking with people who have the same sex and when talking with people have the opposite sex.

Here are some results from my research.

| |Attitudes to |Attitudes to Women |Attitudes by |

| |Men | |Both |

| |By |By Women |By |By |To |To Women |

| |Men | |Men |Women |Men | |

|4. If your friend is telling you his or her problem, what will you do? |

|a) just listen |0% |9% |26% |17% |14% |13% |

|b) sympathize with your friend |23% |35% |12% |14% |17% |24% |

|c) try to solve the problem |77% |56% |62% |69% |69% |63% |

|and give advice. | | | | | | |

|8. When you are talking with your friends for a long time, what would you do? |

|a)cut into their talking |40% |20% |26 |21% |32% |21% |

|often | | | | | | |

|b) keep listening until he/she finished |60% |80% |74% |79% |68% |79% |

|11. Which type are you when you talk? |

|a) talk emotionally |32% |35% |57% |79% |46% |60% |

|b) talk logically |68% |65% |43% |21% |54% |40% |

Compare the results with the definition of D.Tannen’s.

-Question No.4

“If your friend is telling you his or her problem, what will you do?”

[Definition] Men tend to just solve problems when they are told problems from their friends, but women tend to listen carefully and sympathize with them.

[Result] Most people answered they try to solve problems and give advice.

-Question No.8

“When you are talking with your friends for a long time, what would

you do?”

[Definition] 96% of the interruptions they found were instances of men

interrupting women.

[Result] Over 60% of people answered they keep listening until the

partner finished.

-Question No.11

“Which type are you when you talk, talk emotionally or talk logically?”

[Definition] Men tend to talk logically. Women tend to talk emotionally.

[Result] About 80% of women answered they talk emotionally when they

talk with women, but only 35% of women answered they talk emotionally

when talking with men. About 70% of men answered they talk logically

when talking with men, but less than half of men answered they talk

logically when talking with women.

･People don’t recognize the difference and their real way of talking.

･They try to behave in their best way even if it’s not the best way for the partners.

･Men and women try to fit their conversational to their partners.

･Definition doesn’t apply to the Japanese sometimes.

Conclusion

Men and women have different goals in communication. Men use language to show their power, while women use language to share their feelings. It’s important to understand the differences and we should not to be stereo typed to the others and talk and try to understand them. We should talk and discuss until both understand each other.

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