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Steve Smith June 22, 2011

The Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement

by Jean M. Twange, Ph.D. and W. Keith Campbell, Ph.D.

p.2 – “Like a disease, narcissism is caused by certain factors, spreads through particular channels, appears as various symptoms and might be halted by preventive measures and cures.”

p.3 – “We love to label the offensive behavior of others to separate them from us.”

p.19 – “Narcissists see themselves as fundamentally superior – they are special, entitled, and unique. Narcissists also lack emotionally warm, caring, and loving relationships with other people. This is the main difference between a narcissist and someone merely high in self-esteem: the high self-esteem person who’s not narcissistic values relationships, but the narcissist does not. The result is a fundamentally imbalanced self – a grandiose, inflated self-image and a lack of deep connections to others.”

p.19 – “Narcissists face an interesting psychological challenge: How do you keep feeling like a special and important person – especially if you aren’t? One approach is simply to use other people as pawns in a grand game of deception… The narcissist spends his or her life regulating his or her social relationships in order to maximize self-admiration.”

p.22 – Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) includes: grandiosity, a lack of empathy, and a need to be admired, among other characteristics.

p.24 – “Narcissists think they are smarter, better looking, and more important than others, but not necessarily more moral, more caring, or more compassionate.”

p.24 – “People merely high in self-esteem also have positive views of themselves, but they also see themselves as loving and moral. This is one reason narcissists lack perspective – close relationships keep the ego in check.”

p.27 – Narcissists do not secretly have low self-esteem. “Deep down inside, narcissists think they’re awesome.”

p.27 – “Narcissists have very similar views of themselves on the inside and the outside – they are secure and positive that they are winners, but believe that caring about others isn’t all that important.”

p.27 – “Name-letter task” to rank letters of the alphabet according to how beautiful or likable they are. Narcissists feel the letters in their own names are powerful and assertive.

p.29 – “Overall, narcissists believe that they are smarter and more beautiful than they actually are.”

p.37 – Culture impacts individuals. In the past, “Strong communities and stable relationships discouraged arrogance and made it less necessary to meet and impress new people.”

p.41 – “In a convenient combination of the American core cultural values of self-admiration and competition, many people believe that always putting yourself first is necessary to compete.”

p.42 – “Overconfidence backfires… narcissists are lousy at taking criticism and learning from mistakes. They also like to blame everyone and everything except themselves for their shortcomings.”

p.43 – “Narcissism is a great prediction of imaginary success – but not of actual success.”

p.43 – “Narcissists also love to be know-it-alls, which psychologists call ‘overclaiming.’”

p.43 – “Narcissists have a high tolerance for risks, because they are so confident they are right and that things will go well.”

p.49 – “Having confidence in your true abilities includes knowing your weaknesses and learning from your failures, and that has nothing to do with hating yourself.”

p.52 – The availability heuristic: “You don’t have to be a narcissist to be successful, but Americans can think of lots of successful narcissists because they’re always grabbing the limelight.”

p.74 – “Unfortunately, much of what parents think raises self-esteem – such as telling a kid he’s special and giving him what he wants – actually leads to narcissism.”

p.75 – “When a group of 1920s mothers listed the traits they wanted their children to have, they name strict obedience, loyalty to church, and good manners. In 1988, few mothers named these traits; instead, they chose independence and tolerance.”

p.82 – “In the studies on parenting and narcissism, this kind of lax parental monitoring was one of the strongest correlates of narcissism in teens. It’s also a good predictor of teen drug and alcohol abuse and crime.”

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