Self-Assessment Adoption Quiz



Are you sure you are ready to adopt a child?

THE GOAL OF THIS QUIZ IS TO HELP YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE IDENTIFY, CLARIFY AND DISCUSS YOUR FEELINGS AND GOALS ABOUT ADOPTION. COMPLETE THE ASSESSMENT SEPARATELY, THEN COMPARE AND DISCUSS YOUR ANSWERS.

1. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest, how badly do you want to adopt?

2. Who wanted to adopt?

o Me (definitely)

o Me (a little bit more than my spouse)

o My spouse/partner (definitely)

o My spouse/partner (a little bit more)

o Both want to adopt

3. Has this topic cause any conflict in your relationship?

4. What is the age of the child would you prefer to adopt? (Underline the preferred age, and circle all ages you would be willing to consider.)

o Newborn (under six months)

o Infant (newborn to 2)

o Preschooler (3 to 5)

o Primary school (6 to 12)

5. Which gender would you prefer in your child?

o Girl

o Boy

o Either

6. Do you feel you are stable in your relationship as a couple without having children?

7. Which friends and family members would you want to tell about your adoption plans? Which would be supportive and which would not?

8. Where would you be willing to go to adopt? (Select all that apply)

o Only from Singapore

o Neighboring states

o China

9. How much time will you take off work after the adoption?

10. How much money would you be willing to spend on an adoption?

11. How much economic hardship would that cause?

12. When and how do you feel children should be told they're adopted?

o As early as possible / preschool

o Mid- to late-childhood

o As adults

o Only when they ask

o Only when they find out

o Never

o Not sure

13. Would you support/assist your child if he/she wanted to find, contact or have a relationship with his/her birthparents?

o Yes

o No

o Don't know

14. Will you or your spouse (partner) change your workload outside the home after the adoption?

o Yes, I will stay at home with the child

o Yes, my spouse will stay at home with the child

o I will reduce my work load to part time

o My spouse will reduce his/her work load to part time

o Will remain the same

o Already stay-at-home

15. What do you feel you could contribute to a child?

16. What aspects of childrearing are so important to you that you would find it difficult to compromise (such as discipline, religion, schooling, stay-at-home parenting, etc.)?

17. Are you ready to love an adopted child as much as one you gave birth to biologically?

o Yes

o No

o I think so

o I don't know

18. Would you prefer to continue with infertility treatment before seriously pursuing adoption? If so, why?

19. Deep down do you feel like you are being forced to adopt if you want to have children, adoption as a means to build a family is "second best," or that adoption is your "last resort" if you want to be able to have children?

(If you answered yes to any of these points, there is a very good chance that you have some significant unresolved issues relating to infertility that you might find beneficial to address and resolve prior to adopting.)

20. How long are you willing to wait to adopt?

o Up to six months

o Six months to 1 year

o 1 year to 2 years

o 2 to 3 years

o However long it takes

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This is a FYCS Document

Last updated on 28-Mar-2003

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