Success in Life and Work



Success in Life and Work

Take Responsibility for Your Life

By Susan M. Heathfield,

See More About:

• taking responsibility

• cultures of accountability

[pic]You are totally responsible for your life. This is the foundation principle you must embrace if you plan for happiness and success in life and work. I coach a young woman currently, a manager in a small company. I am struck, every time we meet, by her failure to take responsibility for what is happening in her work and life. Everything is someone else’s fault. Every problem is explained away with reasons about why she can’t affect the situation or the outcome.

Blame and Excuses Are the Hallmarks of an Unsuccessful Life

On television, I briefly watched three jailed individuals who are seeking parole from the Parole Board, talk about themselves. I noticed the same pattern in their reasoning and approach to life. Nothing was their fault including the incidents that landed each of them in jail. I suspect that if I interviewed more incarcerated individuals, I would find a pattern of “not my fault.” That is why taking responsibility for choices, actions, and direction is so powerfully important. Without taking responsibility, you’ll likely look at your life as a failure because you allowed yourself to be blown hither and yon, by any passing wind. And, you blamed the wind for how things turned out.

People who take complete responsibility for their lives experience joy and control of circumstances. They are able to make choices because they understand that they are responsible for their choices. Indeed, even when events that are not under your control, go awry, you can, at least, determine how you will react to the event. You can make an event a disaster or you can use it as an opportunity to learn, to grow, to cherish your faith, to hold loved ones close.

How to Take Responsibility for Your Life

The most important aspect of taking responsibility for your life is to acknowledge that your life is your responsibility. No one can live your life for you. You are in charge. No matter how hard you try to blame others for the events of your life, each event is the result of choices you made and are making. Listen to the little voice in your head. And, observe yourself talking with coworkers, family members, and friends. Do you hear yourself taking responsibility or placing blame?

• Listen to the voice in your head. Eliminate blame; eliminate excuses. If the blame track or the excuse track plays repeatedly in your mind, you are shifting responsibility for your decisions and life to others.

• Second, listen to yourself when you speak. In your conversation, do you hear yourself blame others for things that don’t go exactly as you want? Do you find yourself pointing fingers at your coworkers or your upbringing, your parent’s influence, the amount of money that you make, or your spouse? Are you making excuses for goals unmet or tasks that missed their deadlines? If you can hear your blaming patterns, you can stop them.

• Third, if an individual you respect supplies feedback that you make excuses and blame others for your woes, take the feedback seriously. Control your defensive reaction and explore examples and deepen your understanding with the coworker or friend. People who responsibly consider feedback attract much more feedback.

Leadership and Management Success Tips

Make No Excuses

By Susan M. Heathfield,

See More About:

• cultures of accountability

• workplace negativity

[pic]Excuses for failure, excuses about your choices in life, excuses about what you feel you have accomplished fuel dysfunctional thinking – and consequently, undesirable actions and behaviors. Making excuses instead of taking one hundred percent responsibility for your actions, your thoughts, and your goals is the hallmark of people who fail to succeed.

Part of the power of taking responsibility for your actions is that you silence the negative, unhelpful voice in your head. When you spend your thinking time on success and goal accomplishment, instead of on making excuses, you free up the emotional space formerly inhabited by negativity.

The next time you catch yourself making an excuse, whether for the late project, the unmet goal, or the job you work, gently remind yourself - no excuses. Spend your thought time planning your next successful venture. Positive thinking becomes a helpful habit. Excuses fuel failure.

Leadership and Management Success Tips

Optimism: The Power of Optimistic Thinking

By Susan M. Heathfield,

See More About:

• optimism

• success

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[pic]The power of optimism cannot be over-rated as a factor in success and personal growth and development. Optimism allows you to see the positive aspects of any situation and enables you to capitalize on each possibility. Optimism may be partly responsible for success in most aspects of life. Some research exists that demonstrates that optimism results in higher achievement.

Part of the power of optimism is the result of changing the outlook of the little voice in your head. Constantly looking at the negative and seeing no options when situations go awry, negative self-talk limits your success. Positive self-talk expands your ability to achieve, to learn, and to accomplish. An optimistic belief in yourself and your capabilities to positively impact situations, even ones that appear negative, fuels success. Try gently moving your mind into positive, optimistic thoughts whenever you find yourself feeling negative, depressed, or wallowing in despair. The rainbow is there; you just need to see it.

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