A BREAKUP OF CULTURE IDEALIZED BODY/SELF IMAGE
What Did We Learn From Susan Boyle?
A Breakup of the Cultural Idealized Image
By Michele Germain
Through the media we learned about Susan Boyle’s appearance on the British Talent Show. The reaction to her simple appearance was startling, causing one to ask, why did so many go from judgmental humor to tearful eyes of loving kindness? And what does this sudden emotional shift mean?
In my opinion, Susan Boyle is a transformational messenger representing a breakup and a moving beyond the culture’s idealized image. As many watched this scene replay over and over on the media, a shift took place within the culture and a shift took place within everyone who was watching.
What is the shift that has taken place? We are conditioned early on by our environment and our significant caretakers to take on the culture idealized body image, as a standard in which to measure our value and worthiness. Because of this we are tightly strung and pulled up out of our bodies walking around, constricted and uncomfortable, trying to create the idealized body image that fits with the culture. Proving our self worth and acceptance becomes a preoccupation. We are not aware of the pressure that we put on ourselves. Therefore, our feelings of imperfection and failure to measure up stay buried, causing us to lose the natural joy of being in our bodies, whatever shape they are. And our genuine self goes into hiding.
The judges and many others who viewed Susan Boyle’s appearance were able to honestly acknowledge out loud their own conditioned mind set that held the culture’s idealized image and the judgmental attitude toward others that resides along side. This created the shift, and a transformational moment, as everyone dropped deeper into their bodies. As the judgmental humor stopped, the fixed and rigid image loosened, and the inner tightness and constriction of the genuine self was released as the tears flowed.
As long as we are engaged in trying to live up to the cultural standard, making this fixed image, our personal ideal, we stay away from our genuine self, disconnected from our essential being. We can fix our face, legs, hips, or stomach, wear different clothes, try to look younger, but we will never find true confidence. A false self is constructed, and the negative self image is hidden from our consciousness. We then can never truly learn to love and value our unique genuine self and our body.
There is nothing wrong with improving our bodies, wearing different clothes, or making ourselves look younger or older, if it is done with the right intention and we abandon trying to prove our worthiness through our looks and shape of our body. So I encourage you to contemplate on these few questions:
:
Are you preoccupied with trying to change yourself so you can change someone else’s mind about you, or get others to value you, or, are you improving yourself for the sake of your own personal fulfillment?
Are you able to be with yourself and the world in your true genuineness, loving yourself with all your imperfections, or do you feel you are always trying to hide some parts of yourself.
The gift of loving kindness that emerged during this event allowed each and everyone of us to love ourselves a little more and value our own unique design. The breakup of the fixed image, leads to the breakthrough we all benefit from. Now we can breathe a little easier and deeper, as we walk out of our homes into the world.
About the Author:
Michele Germain, LCSW, is a San Diego-based psychotherapist and certified bioenergetic analyst with more than 25 years experience. As a specialist in divorce recovery for the last decade, she has written articles, conducted workshops and spoken on television and radio. More information on her work can be found at .
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