Healthy Relationships

Healthy Relationships Toolkit

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Teacher's Guide

Acknowledgments

This report was made possible by the following individuals and agencies:

Nicole Anderson Sara Anderson Monica Bailey Lisa Balland Shauna Barfuss Priscilla Cabral Patsy Chandler Trevor Crump Carrie Jensen Brandi LeCain Rosa Martinez Katie McMinn Kimberlee Montoya CeCie Scharman Ashley Sokia Julie Stephenson Cindy Taylor Mina Uscharawadi Megan Waters Julie Werner

Westminster College CAPSA Utah State University Planned Parenthood New Hope Centro de la Familia Utah State PTA Westminster College Prevent Child Abuse Utah Your Community Connection Centro de la Familia Utah Department of Health Utah Domestic Violence Council Salt Lake School District Westminster College Safe Harbor Rape Recovery Center Center for Women and Children in Crisis Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Rape Recovery Center

For more information contact:

Mailing Address: Utah Department of Health

Violence and Injury Prevention Program

PO Box 142106

Salt Lake City, UT 84114-2106

Telephone: 801-538-6864

Fax:801-538-9134

Email:vipp@

Website: p

This Toolkit was adapted for Utah classrooms from the evidence-based curriculum`Safe Dates', which has been shown to significantly reduce psychological, sexual, and physical abuse and perpetration in national studies.

Letter to the Educator

Welcome to the Healthy Relationships Curriculum! This curriculum was designed through cross-agency collaboration for the purpose of teaching high school students about healthy relationships, choices, and communication. The curriculum addresses attitudes, opinions, and behaviors related to dating abuse and healthy relationships.

This curriculum has been developed to fulfill a need identified by community educators and agencies, for a more current and relevant program that speaks frankly about relationships to a growing generation. This curriculum offers a holistic approach to teaching teens how to identify abusive dating behaviors and build healthy relationships. Topics such as values, equality, power, control, communication, and emotional expression are all covered. The toolkit allows any educator--from those with a limited background in teaching healthy relationships to those with extensive knowledge on the topic--to teach the lessons as a whole program, or to pick and choose which lessons best fit the students'needs and classroom instruction.

This curriculum was created with the Utah teen in mind, including a"Who Can Help?"section as a significant feature located near the end of the manual. Resources from around the state have been thoroughly researched and listed on one convenient page to help provide teens with the support they need outside of the classroom. National and local websites are also included in an effort to encourage teens to research more about the topics presented and to connect them to accurate and safe information on the Internet.

We hope this toolkit can provide safe and engaging classroom time for both students and educators. We also hope it sheds light on an important part of adolescence that needs guidance and support. We are confident the skills developed through the use of this curriculum will last a lifetime and enable people to make healthy choices in all of their relationships.

Section 1: Defining Healthy Relationships

Section Description Through fun activities (such as the Relationship Circle and Relationship Bingo) and class discussion, students begin to identify what creates a healthy, respectful relationship and consider how they want to be treated in the context of a relationship.

Preparation ? Copies of pages 1?5 of the student packet for each student. ? Optional: Prize for the winner of Relationship Bingo.

Explain to your students: We're here today to talk about relationships. The activities in your packet and the topics we will be covering will help you in all the relationships in your life. This packet will help you strengthen the relationship you have with your parents, friends, peers, and people you date.

We will be talking about: What a healthy and unhealthy relationship looks like. How people in our lives make us feel and how we deal with it. How we communicate with people we love.

PART 1: RELATIONSHIP CIRCLE

Purpose: To help students identify the relationships they have with different peo-

ple, how those relationships are different, and what those relationships mean to

them.

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Have your students begin filling out the relationship circle on page 1 of their student packet by writing their name in the middle circle.

Have your students write the names of the people they have close relationships with in the next circle. These people can be a family member, friend, etc.

Have your students write the names of people they know but may not have a close relationship with in the outermost circle, for example, a coach, a teacher, a boss, or a neighbor.

Ask your students, "If you were dating someone, what circle would that person be in?" Explain to students that for the next few minutes they will be talking about the relationship they have with the person they are dating.

Begin by asking your students the following questions:

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What do you think of when you think of dating?

What are some activities you do when you are dating?

6. Have one of the students write the responses on the board.

This list of responses serves as a collective definition of what dating is to this

particular group and can be referred to throughout the remainder of the

1

lesson.

Section 1: Defining Healthy Relationships

PART2: DATING BINGO

Purpose: To help students think about dating and making choices about dating. 1. Have students go to page 2 of their packets.

2. Review the directions listed on the Dating Bingo page.

3. Give students one minute to circle boxes and about four minutes to walk around and collect signatures.

4. After someone yells Bingo, check the card, and if possible, award the winner with a prize (candy, pencil, or extra credit, etc.).

5. Discuss with your students what traits they chose and why. Then ask the students if they noticed some of the traits you would look for in a dating partner for a friend.

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Section 1: Defining Healthy Relationships

PART 3: CARING PEOPLE AND CARING RELATIONSHIPS

Purpose: To have students explore relationships that make them feel good about themselves.

1. Explain to your students: Dating Bingo was supposed to help them identify qualities and characteristics they want in someone they are dating.

2. Have students go to page 3 of their packets and read the instructions under entry 1. Give students a minute to write their list.

3. Read the instructions under entry 2. Give students about five minutes to do this.

4. Ask the following question when students are finished, and have a student write their responses on the board:

What are some ways people have treated you that have helped you feel good about yourself?

5. Draw out or highlight some of the students' top answers. The list may look something like this:

? They respected me.

? They trusted me. ? They listened to me. ? They believed in me. ? They encouraged me. ? They cared about me.

Explain to your students: You should take the students' responses and relate them to one of the items bulleted. For example:

Student's response: "My mom told me I was really good at soccer and I should try out for a school team."

Teacher's response: "So, your mom was encouraging you and believed in your ability as a soccer player."

Point out that these things are important in any relationship, whether it is a dating relationship or the relationship you have with a friend, sibling, or parent.

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Section 1: Defining Healthy Relationships

PART 4: HOW I WANT TO BE TREATED BY PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT

Purpose: To have students identify the ways they want to be treated.

1. Explain to your students: a. We all have different types of relationships. b. We all want to have relationships with people who respect our opinions, encourage us, and support us during our hard times. c. It is important for us to have a clear idea of how we want to be treated by other people.

2. Have students go to page 4 of their packets.

3. Read the directions: "Below are a figure and a list of ways people may treat each other. The figure represents you. On the two solid lines above the figure, write the two most important ways you want to be treated by someone you care about. On the dotted lines surrounding the figure, list five additional actions that are important to you. Feel free to write in ideas that aren't on the list."

4. Have the students complete the activity.

5. Have a discussion with your students about the items they selected.

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4

Section 1: Defining Healthy Relationships

PART 5: EQUALITY WHEEL

Purpose: To have students review characteristics of a healthy relationship.

1. Have students go to page 5 in their student packets.

2. Explain to your students: a. This is the equality wheel. b. Equality is in the middle circle because we want to be equals in all of our relationships.

3. Have one student read one of the sections of the equality wheel. Ask the other students to give examples of an action that would demonstrate the concept that is addressed in that section.

4. Continue steps 2 and 3 until all sections of the wheel are addressed.

TEACHER'S GUIDE Ask your students the question, "How do we develop healthy relationships with people we love?" Refer to the "Equality Wheel." This list will provide some strategies for recognizing respectful and supportive relationships and avoiding negative ones that you can discuss with your students.

For more information about building healthy relationships and preventing dating violence, visit health.

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5

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