Why am I finding it so difficult to adjust? I was never ...



FAQs from children and young people about life in lockdownContents TOC \o "1-3" \h \z \u 1.Why am I finding it so difficult to adjust? I was never like this. PAGEREF _Toc39844812 \h 22.a) I am binge eating and I can’t stop. b) I don’t feel like eating at all. PAGEREF _Toc39844813 \h 23.My parents are constantly after me to do this or that. I am so mad. PAGEREF _Toc39844814 \h 24.I can’t concentrate on my studies. I zone out in the online classes. I can’t understand things easily. This never happened to me. PAGEREF _Toc39844815 \h 35.I get suddenly breathless or very scared or hyper for no apparent reason. PAGEREF _Toc39844816 \h 36.a) I feel very low at times. I don’t know what’s going to happen. It feels like this will never end. PAGEREF _Toc39844817 \h 3b) I spend hours doing nothing. Or I just scroll through Instagram. Then I see all these people doing things and that makes me even more depressed. PAGEREF _Toc39844818 \h 3c) I miss my friends and my life earlier. It makes me cry at times. It gets very lonely. PAGEREF _Toc39844819 \h 37.I have my board exams and if things go like this, I don’t know if I will be able to score well enough to get into my stream. I am freaking out! PAGEREF _Toc39844820 \h 48.I used to be on my phone a lot earlier. But now it has gone to another level. I think I’m getting totally addicted and it’s harming my studies. PAGEREF _Toc39844821 \h 49.Everyone in my class seems to understand the concepts taught in class and they have answers to all the questions. I used to be the one who knew all the answers. Now I am falling way behind. I feel so ashamed and frustrated. PAGEREF _Toc39844822 \h 510.My family problems have become more during this lockdown. Sometimes I feel things may go out of hand. I am scared and don’t know what to do. PAGEREF _Toc39844823 \h 511.My parents work in a hospital. Seeing them leave for work every day makes me very scared. I can’t do anything until they are back. Sometimes it is very late at night but I have to stay up and make sure they are home safe. PAGEREF _Toc39844824 \h 6Why am I finding it so difficult to adjust? I was never like this. Humans are social beings; we love the company of our friends and family, we love to go out and experience different things. All these things energise us and keep us motivated and happy. We are not used to staying indoors for very long periods of time. We miss our friends, our school, our work and the various activities we used to do. Or energy levels drop and motivation to do things go down. It’s normal to feel this way. A lot of people around the world, including children and young people, are also feeling low and finding this time difficult. You are not alone. It helps if you maintain a routine and stick to it as many days as possible. In your day, you should include a mix of activities in addition to your study - Study + Something Physical + Something Creative + Something Social + Something Funa) I am binge eating and I can’t stop.b) I don’t feel like eating at all. Stress can often lead to eating problems. Some may eat too much or have strong cravings for fast food or junk food. Some may not feel like eating at all. You can help yourself by eating at regular times. If you find that you are bingeing on junk food, you can help yourself by keeping only a limited number of snacks with you. If you are not feeling hungry, even then eat at regular times even if you eat a little. My parents are constantly after me to do this or that. I am so mad. You can find parents annoying at times. They want the right things for you but sometimes how they say things or how you say things can cause issues between you. Remember that they are also having a hard time handling the current situation. They are worried about work, you, other family members. Independence and responsibility go hand in hand. If you want to have independence you must take responsibility for your own tasks and things. For example, you can complete your tasks for the day on your own without needing your parents to monitor. You can also help your parents with housework. The more responsibility you take for your work and also around the house, the more your parents are likely to trust you to manage by yourself. I can’t concentrate on my studies. I zone out in the online classes. I can’t understand things easily. This never happened to me. Online classes are whole new different way of learning. It is different to siting in a classroom with your fellow students and learning from the teacher face-to-face. So it takes time to get used to it. You can help yourself by doing a few things. Make sure you have a fixed study spot, with a table and chair. Having a fixed spot helps you concentrate. During classes or study time, have the “Quiet Time” rule, which means no talking to anyone in the family and only focusing on the online class or studies. Keep a note of things that you don’t understand and clarify them later. I get suddenly breathless or very scared or hyper for no apparent reason. What you are describing sounds like a panic attack. This can happen when you are worried. It is very disturbing to experience something like this but it is not life threatening. It only means that you are VERY worried about something or stressed out. Life during lockdown is very stressful and there could be a number of things on your mind – studies, family, friends, keeping safe, etc. When this happens, remind yourself that it is not life-threatening and that it will pass. Then take slow deep breaths until you start to feel better. Breathing deeply in a panic attack might feel very odd but do it gently and soon you will feel better. If there is anything in particular bothering you, share it with someone you trust, particularly an adult. Or talk to your school counsellor. a) I feel very low at times. I don’t know what’s going to happen. It feels like this will never end. b) I spend hours doing nothing. Or I just scroll through Instagram. Then I see all these people doing things and that makes me even more depressed. c) I miss my friends and my life earlier. It makes me cry at times. It gets very lonely. Life during lockdown can be extremely hard. One day you were sailing through life, you had school, friends, family, outings, and movies, the next day all of that is gone and you are forced to stay indoors. So it is natural to feel low and depressed. However, this will pass as well. It is a matter of time. Meanwhile, try to follow the suggestions mentioned in this FAQ list. Different countries the world over are slowly coming out of lockdown. Some countries have even reopened schools. So even for us, it is a matter of time. All we can do is keep ourselves safe and have loads of patience. Also avoid too much time on social media and especially from negative news. Use your mobile and internet to find positive news and to learn new things. I have my board exams and if things go like this, I don’t know if I will be able to score well enough to get into my stream. I am freaking out! Freaking out is natural. It means you care about your future. But if you are so freaked out that you are not able to study at all, then the worry is getting too much. If you are finding that you are not able to adjust to online classes, read the earlier FAQ about online classes. The best people to talk to about catching up with the syllabus are your teachers. They will be able to help you. Many schools and universities across the world are adjusting their syllabus and exam marking criteria so that it is fair to students. So it is likely that CBSE and other educational professionals are also looking at the situation in India and planning to do something so that students are helped in the best possible way. What you can do in this time is to make the best possible use of the online classes and study as much as possible. Stay focussed on your tasks and let school teachers and other education experts work out the best solutions. I used to be on my phone a lot earlier. But now it has gone to another level. I think I’m getting totally addicted and it’s harming my studies. It can happen that when we are stressed we need an outlet. Sometimes phones fulfil that need. But it can easily get out of hand. Mobile games, social media etc. are very addictive and you can easily get lost in them. Prior to the lockdown you’d have met friends and gone to school so you wouldn’t have had the time or felt the need to use the phone that much. But during the lockdown your phone becomes your way of connecting with friends and family and the outside world. You have realised it is becoming a problem for you, that is the first step towards managing it. You can try a few different things. You can fix a time when you will use your phone for studies, when you will use it to socialise, when you will use it for entertainment. Then you try and stick to those times. You have to be honest about it because after all if you are cheating the system you created, you are the one who is getting harmed. Setting goals for yourself and meeting them is a life skill. You can also observe what you use your phone for and switch to educational and useful material. You can also ask your parent or someone you trust to remind you if you are misusing your phone. At the end of the day, this is about self-discipline and the more you try to control yourself, the better you get at being disciplined. Everyone in my class seems to understand the concepts taught in class and they have answers to all the questions. I used to be the one who knew all the answers. Now I am falling way behind. I feel so ashamed and frustrated. Online classes are whole new different way of learning. It is different to siting in a classroom with your fellow students and learning from the teacher face-to-face. So it takes time to understand how you learn and adapt to it. Everyone’s way of learning and speed of learning is different. Seeing your friends advance more than you will naturally make you feel bad. The fact that you feel ashamed and frustrated show that you actually care about studying hard. But for some reason you are not able to make as much progress as you would like to. Instead of comparing with others (which is actually natural to do) you try to find out exactly where you are finding it difficult. Once you know the list of things that you are finding difficult, approach your teacher or your parents for help. Remember this is a new way of learning and you don’t have the opportunity to clarify doubts like you used to in class. So make the list and talk to a teacher for extra help. My family problems have become more during this lockdown. Sometimes I feel things may go out of hand. I am scared and don’t know what to do. This is a difficult situation for you to be in. You can’t necessarily do anything about adult problems. If you can, talk to your parent or parents about how all this is affecting you and what you’d like to happen instead. You can always talk to another adult you trust or your school counsellor. Don’t bottle up things and don’t take it upon yourself to fix the problems. My parents work in a hospital. Seeing them leave for work every day makes me very scared. I can’t do anything until they are back. Sometimes it is very late at night but I have to stay up and make sure they are home safe. It will be very scary in such a situation. If you allow the fear to build up, it can lead to a lot of stress and can make it difficult to concentrate on studies or anything else. Seeing you worried will make your parents worry too. In such situations you think about things logically and act logically. For example, always follow the advice given by health authorities about washing hands and wearing masks and about social distancing. Your parents will by default always be careful because they are trained on how to keep safe from infections. Also remember that for the vast majority of people infected by coronavirus, the symptoms will not be severe and some will show no symptoms at all. Only a very small percentage of people need to be hospitalised. Most are kept in quarantine until they recover. Because the news focuses so much on the cases and number of deaths, it seems like it is all bad news. Talk to your parents about your worries. During the day, try to keep in touch via WhatsApp or video chats or even voice messages. This way you won’t let the anxiety build up so much. ................
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