Defects of thought - Emotional Sobriety And Food



Defects of thoughtSelfishnessSelf-centred thinkingSelf-seekingFearDishonestyIn other words:(1) Putting yourself ahead of other people(2) Not caring about other people(3) Unkind thoughts about those that threaten or hurt usWhat you think about yourselfThinking about what you(1) want to get(2) have lost(3) are afraid of not getting(4) are afraid of losingWrite what the specific fear is, e.g. "fear of failure"NB fear also manifests as or leads to:This also includes the forms of distorted thinkingFor example:For example:For example:For example:ContemptCriticisingHatredIndifferenceIntoleranceJudgingMercilessnessScornSelfishness'Special & different'ArroganceBeating yourself upDefensivenessGuiltHypersensitivityLack of self-evaluationSelf-centrednessSelf-consciousnessSelf-doubtSelf-importanceSelf-justificationSelf-obsessionSelf-righteousnessSelf-satisfactionSense of fraudulenceShameBitterness/self-pityBlameEnvyExpectationGreed/gluttonyImpatienceJealousyObsessingOver-ambitionOver-analysingPerfectionismZero–sum thinkingAnxietyIndecisionInflexibilityMistrustPessimismProjectionResistance to changeRigiditySuspicionWorryLyingDistortingWithholding the truth Believing feelingsBlack-and-white thinkingDenialDespairEmbellishmentExaggerationFantasyGeneralisationGullibilityHypocrisyIrrationalityLack of perspectiveLack of proportionNegativityNostalgiaTunnel-visionDefects of behaviourResentment leads to:Selfishness leads to:Self-seeking leads to:Self-centeredness leads to:Dishonesty leads to:Fear leads to:Bad-temperednessBitchingBrusquenessBullyingColdnessComplainingCriticisingImpolitenessMalicePatronisationPhysical violenceProvocationPunishingRetaliationSarcasmScaring peopleShaming peopleVerbal abuseArguingDismissing peopleDominating conversationsGossipingIgnoring peopleImpatienceInconsistencyIndifference/apathy in dealings with othersInflexibilityIndiscretionLack of disciplineNeglectNot listeningSaying 'no' too oftenStealing other people's crises and making them your ownTaking people for grantedWithdrawingWithholding yourselfWith other people:CharmChoosing chaosComplying just to gain approvalControllingFixingFlatteryFocusing on people who don't like youGiving people attention only when they ignore youGiving to getGraciousnessIngratiationInterferingMaking (excessive) demandsManaging situationsManipulationMartyrdomMotheringPulling rankStealingGeneralImbalance between different areas of lifeOvereatingOverspendingOverworkingAttention-seekingBeing different to gain an identityBoastingDefensivenessExhibitionismFishing for complimentsFitting in to gain an identityInappropriate self-expressionSelf-justificationShowing offConcealing the truthDistortionLyingRecklessnessRepeating mistakes and expecting different resultsSticking your head in the sandSecretivenessAvoiding intimacyAvoiding amendsChoosing short-term gain over long-term painCompulsive busynessDuvet-divingFire-fighting (only dealing with the urgent)InactionIsolatingMonkey-mind (mental restlessness)Not asking for helpNot playing enoughNot restingNot setting boundariesNot spending enoughNot working enoughOver-dependenceProcrastinationRearranging the deckchairs on the TitanicSaying 'yes' too oftenSelf-neglectSlothStewingSteps Six and Seven (Joe) The greatest resentments we have show the greatest assets in ourselves we are holding on to. Until we let go of these assets (i.e. our attachment to them), we will never let go of the resentment. When old habits come up, we are faced with a decision in Step Seven: go down the old path of selfishness, self-seeking, dishonesty, and resentment or go down the new path of trusting in God and laughing it off—seeing where others may be right. As with Jim's story ("That didn't seem to bother me so I tried another,") we will only seek God's help when the defect really starts to bother us. 12x12 (p. 72–73): "We had lacked the perspective to see that character-building and spiritual values had to come first . . . But whenever we had to choose between character and comfort, the character-building was lost in the dust of our chase after what we thought was happiness." How these defects really start to bother us is when we see that the harm we do to others is harm we do to ourselves because we are them and they are us. Once that realization penetrates, there is no way we CAN break 'the commandments' as we cannot harm ourselves. Our obedience is to the unenforceable: it is our knowledge of the wages of resentment etc. that ultimately prompts enforcement. There is no external agent. The laws of the universe that dictate that whatever harm we do to others we do to ourselves are impersonal. Gravity affects everyone the same way. It also needs no police. There is no "other": they are me and I am them. The way I see them is the way they will see me. Steps Six and Seven (Lauren) Steps Four and Five are about uncovering what is 'objectionable'. What we have found is not yet a defect: everything is going to come round again, and we will be given the opportunity to repeat everything we have got wrong. If we do it again, it THEN becomes a defect. In Steps Six and Seven, God does the heavy lifting. In the moment of temptation, ask God: "I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows." Keyword: NOW. Ask to be shown another way IN THE MOMENT. You only have to be willing NOW, i.e. not in advance! The short form: "show me a different way/show me a new way." An exercise: With each thinking/behaviour pattern: (1) How has this protected me? (I.e. what am I after?/What am I trying to avoid?) (2) If I continue to do this, how will it affect my life? (3) How would my life be different if I let go of this? ALL I have to do is be aware and take it to God: offer every defect up to God.A Step Six willingness inventory. . . we then look at Step Six. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? Can He now take them all every one? If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing. (76:1, 'Alcoholics Anonymous')Steps Seven to Twelve solve alcoholism by shifting the focus from my welfare and others' conduct onto my conduct and others' welfare, starting from Step Seven:When ready, we say something like this: "My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding. Amen." We have now completed Step Seven. (76:2)The inventory is done. The confession is done. No further analysis of self is needed.What is needed now is action to abandon self. That requires willingness and only willingness. I cannot change myself. I can, however, take action that clears the way for God to change me. This is why willingness is indispensible.The following passages and associated questions aim to tease out whether the individual (me or someone I am sponsoring) is or is not willing to have God remove the problem—self-centredness.For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that. My wife and I abandoned ourselves with enthusiasm to the idea of helping other alcoholics to a solution of their problems. (14:6 et seq.)Simple but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all. (14:1)Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them. (27:4)At some of these we balked. We thought we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not. With all the earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely. (58:3)Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it will kill us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power. We had to have God's help. (62:2)But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. For when harbouring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die. If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be dubious luxury of normal men, but for the alcoholics, these things are poison. (66:1–2)To get over drinking will require a transformation of thought and attitude. We all had to place recovery above everything, for without recovery we would have lost both home and business. (143:1)Do I believe I will die if I remain trapped in self-centredness?Am I willing, without reservation, to jettison every idea, emotion, and attitude that my Steps Four and Five have shown to be the cause of my ruin, both drunk and sober?Am I willing, without reservation, to forgive everyone for everything, knowing that my anger will kill me if I don't?Must I be rid of my self-centredness at all costs?Am I willing, without reservation, to turn to God in all matters at all times?Am I willing, without reservation, to abandon myself, the way people abandon a sinking ship, with enthusiasm to work and self-sacrifice for others?Am I willing, without reservation, to place the actions of Steps Eight to Twelve above everything?Am I willing to focus solely on others' welfare and my conduct, leaving my welfare and others' conduct to God?He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within. (95:3)I cannot force anyone else's willingness or my own.If I am unwilling, I need to look deep inside at my experience and face, fearlessly, the proposition that God is everything or God is nothing (53:2). There is no half-way house; there is no middle-of-the-road solution (25:3). 6 Question & Action SuggestionsNote: I’ve searched for Step 6 materials and found many similar things from a number of sources. This is a representative sample. I did variations on this with sponsors and have had sponsees use them as well. People may chose to do some or all of the suggestions. Suggestion 1Read the following: page 75 from the Big Book, last paragraph, to page 76, second paragraph; Big Book, the first page of "Freedom from Bondage" (pg 544, 4th Edition); Step 6 in both the AA & OA 12&12Write about how you relate to the readings. Willingness is the key to Step 6. After you read, discuss and reflect on these questions:Are you willing to have your defects removed?Or, if you’re not willing, are you willing to become willing?Suggestion 2: Answer these questions after reading Step 6 in the OA 12 & 12:1.What is the difference between saying I'm entirely ready and being entirely ready?2.Why is it so hard to be entirely ready to part with my defects?3.Am I fearful? Do I feel I would be less interesting as a human being without some of my defects?4.What are the choice defects that I would rather keep?5.What does being entirely ready mean to me?6.What do each of my defects do for me?7.What do each of my defects do to me?8.How has each of these old tools for coping with my life outlived its usefulness?9.What harm is it doing me to cling to each of these ways of thinkingand acting?10.What do I believe is the essence of the sixth step?11.What is my attitude regarding change?Suggestion 3: Charting your character defectsCreate a 5 column chart. Use the following headings then fill in the chart.Column 1:Name character defectColumn 2:What does this defect so for you? How is it helping you?Column 3:How is it now hurting you? Do you believe it has now out served its usefulness? Are you ready to let it go?"Column 4:What would you/your life look like without this defect?Column 5:What is the contrary action of this defect? (Example, if the character defect is controlling your children, a contrary action may be to foster their independence. Be as specific as possible.)Suggestion 4: Daily Actions1.Abstain from compulsive overeating2.For the next 14 days "Humbly ask God to remove these defects of character".3.Practice the contrary action (See Sugg. 3, above) until God removes your defects - act “as if" while waiting!4.Create a daily specific Gratitude List with at least 10 items.(Used in conjunction with the book at: 12 Steps or for personal exploration) STEP 6 WORKSHEET, “WERE ENTIRELY READY TO HAVE GOD REMOVE ALL THESE DEFECTS OF CHARACTER.” Do you really want to be able to manage your character defects or do you want to continue to be managed by them? MAKE A LIST OF CHARACTER DEFECTS THAT YOU ARE EXHIBITING IN YOUR LIFE TODAY. TAKE YOU TIME THIS IS AN ONGOING LIST 1_______________________________________ 2_______________________________________ 3_______________________________________ ADDRESS THE MOST SIGNIFICANT CHARACTER DEFECT WITH THE FOLLOWING QUESTIONS AND PROCESS EACH THROUGH STEP 6 AND STEP 7 BEFORE MOVING ONTO THE NEXT DEFECT. IDENTIFY A CHARACTER DEFECT THAT YOU ARE EXHIBITING IN YOUR LIFE TODAY. WHAT WAS THE LAST CIRCUMSTANCE THAT YOU ACTED OUT IN THAT CHARACTER DEFECT? HAS ANYONE SHARED CONCERNS ABOUT THAT BEHAVIOR IN THE PAST? (FAMILY, FRIENDS, ETC.) LOOKING AT THE PATTERN WHERE YOU ACT OUT IN THE BEHAVIOR, IS THERE ANY SITUATIONS, STRESS OR TRIGGERS THAT CAUSE THIS? E. HOW LONG HAS THIS TRAIT BEEN A PART OF YOUR LIFE? F. WHAT DOES DOING THE BEHAVIOR GIVE YOU? G. WHAT IMPACT DOES THIS BEHAVIOR HAVE ON YOU NEGATIVELY? H. WHAT IMPACT DOES THIS BEHAVIOR HAVE ON OTHERS AROUND YOU? I. DOES THIS CHARACTER DEFECT AFFECT YOUR VALUES AND IN WHAT WAY? HOW DOES THIS MAKE YOU FEEL? IDENTIFY A CHARACTER DEFECT THAT YOU ARE EXHIBITING IN YOUR LIFE TODAY. WHAT WAS THE LAST CIRCUMSTANCE THAT YOU ACTED OUT IN THAT CHARACTER DEFECT? HAS ANYONE SHARED CONCERNS ABOUT THAT BEHAVIOR IN THE PAST? (FAMILY, FRIENDS, ETC.) LOOKING AT THE PATTERN WHERE YOU ACT OUT IN THE BEHAVIOR, IS THERE ANY SITUATIONS, STRESS OR TRIGGERS THAT CAUSE THIS? E. HOW LONG HAS THIS TRAIT BEEN A PART OF YOUR LIFE? F. WHAT DOES DOING THE BEHAVIOR GIVE YOU? G. WHAT IMPACT DOES THIS BEHAVIOR HAVE ON YOU NEGATIVELY? H. WHAT IMPACT DOES THIS BEHAVIOR HAVE ON OTHERS AROUND YOU? I. DOES THIS CHARACTER DEFECT AFFECT YOUR VALUES AND IN WHAT WAY? HOW DOES THIS MAKE YOU FEEL? Doing Step Four and Five the Big Book way, we have realized that we have four major character defects, all stemming from our wish to have our own way.· We are selfish—we basically want our way, whether for good or bad or a mixture of reasons.· We are dishonest—we don’t tell others or ourselves the truth about reality.· We are self-seeking—how others react to us defines how we feel about ourselves.· And we are full of fear.Out of these four major character defects we have constructed any number of behaviors that create problems for us—a tendency to isolate, or to gossip, or to live in a fantasy world, or to manipulate others, or to have bad relationships with others, or to be full of anger, or to be paralyzed by fear, or to be full of lust or gluttony or pride or sloth or greed or envy, or to feel exceedingly sorry for ourselves— or a combination of many of these! But all of these behaviors come down to the four character defects.It's talking about seeing things we find objectionable about ourselves. Seeing the things we're not willing to turn to God for help with.Read the first five steps. We are building an arch through we will walk free men (and women) at last. Is our work is solid so far?Step 1: Do you find the idea that you lose control over alcohol or drugs objectionable in your life today? Why do I need an act of God in my life when it comes to alcohol and drugs to save me?Our agnosticism: Did I doubt that there is a power greater than myself?Did I walk around in my life like I was the only power in my life? Do I find that that's objectionable today in my life? Do I find objectionable the idea that there is no other power in my life that's going to work in my life except me? Do I find objectionable the idea that I am just going to have to work real hard to force what I want out of this world?Does self-will fails me? Do I see how I played God in my life? Do I see how step 4 is the script of self well?Did my playing God work?Are we willing to look at each resentment and let God remove from us all the things that we find objectionable?Review each inventory: can I see the part of that interactions that behavior which I find objectionable?Am I now ready to let God remove these things that I find objectionable?If I don’t trust that there is a power that will work in my life nothing is going to change for me.Am I willing to trust that there is a Power that will work in my life?Fellowship/OA: it is the 12 step process outlined in the BB and it is being in a place where I can work with others.This program is not just about me getting what I can get out of the 12 step process. This is about a bigger commitment than just what this thing can do for me.I do not want to turn the spiritual process into a selfish process.COE is a spiritual malady that takes me to the obsession – to the physical lack of control—this is the nature of my problem.The ultimate question: Am I who G-d would have me be?My defective behavior or the defects in my character are the things out here that you would list.But underneath, those are the things that we looked at - the delusions and the fears. Because the fears drive the delusions that results in the thinking that manifested in the actions, the selfish actions that we took.Selfishness self-centeredness that we think is the root of my trouble and how it's driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity. My fear drives the delusions that result in the thinking that end up in the actions, selfish actions that I take. Fear comes from the idea that self-reliance will fail me.I have to have God's help.It is about understanding how badly I need G-d to move me beyond where I am.Read through your entire inventory to reflect on the defects of your character in each situation.Make a list of anything you admit is objectionable but that you are unwilling to turn to G-d for help with or are unwilling to let go of.Don’t only list words. Briefly describe what comes to you with your unwillingness to turn to G-d.What behavior don’t I want to stop?What resentment do I want to hang onto?Where was I selfish, dishonest, self-seeking, afraid (fearful), self-reliant?How was my conduct in relationships in my inventory?What did the objectionable behavior look like in each resentment?Pray and ask G-d to help you to be willing to let go of any lingering resentments or character defects which block you from G-d, other people and yourself.DIB willingness is indispensable?Am I ready to let G-d remove from me all the things which we have admitted are objectionable?What you learned about yourself with the first 5 steps that you find objectionable that you haven’t been able to do anything about yourself and that you need to turn to G-d for help with?How am I blocked from G-d by my actions?If I don't trust that there is a power that will work in my life nothing is going to change for me.This is not just about me getting what I can get out of the 12-step process. Going off and working on my relationships and getting the money back. I have to see that this is about a bigger commitment than just what this thing can do for me. You see many examples of this turning the spiritual process into a selfish process.If you have a relationship with a person and you ignore that relationship how good is that relationship going to be? Not very good, right? And I see that my relationship with God has been like that. I have completely ignored the possibility that there was a power that would work in my life.So there is a line that I draw through six and seven -straight down the middle of six and seven. Six is bringing everything I've seen from the first five steps and all of the defects I'm aware of now in six to this point and when I can honestly say I am ready to turn to this power.Then, I say the seventh step prayer and only then. And it's not about me working on my defects; it's not about being stuck in six because I still have character defects. Would you say the way you drank is the defective part of you? Or the way you used drugs is that the defective part of your nature? Has God removed your alcoholism or has he just removed the problem? So who am I to pick and choose the things I am supposed to work on in my life.God removes the problem of my alcoholism, but not the alcoholism.And my biggest defect is turned into one of my biggest assets to God and the people around me. Because, God can use that defect of character in me to help others. So to sit and stand in judgment of myself based on my behavior and what I do, you know it could be a hard place to operate from - but a lot of people do that right? When I look at myself you know and what I want and what I don't have, you know I can get into that place - what I wished that I was – am I who God would have me be? That everything has fallen into place just as it has to be.Do you recognize the importance of sharing your character defects with another human being? Why is it important to you?· What do you expect from the person who is going to hear your Step Five?· Will you be open to that person’s asking you questions, providing you with feedback?· What do you think about the proposition that the behaviors that many of us have understood to be “character defects” (the Seven Deadly Sins, gossiping, etc.) are really symptoms of the four major character defects?· Can you take something you thought to be a character defect and relate it to the four character defects (selfishness, dishonesty, self-seeking, and fear) discussed by the Big Book?· Does doing Steps Six and Seven the same day as you do Step Five bother you?· Why does it bother you? Is it simply because you think you should spend as much time on those steps as all the others?Because you’ve been told you should? Or because you think something may be missing? If so, what?STEP 6Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.When I was drinking and in trouble, I wanted God to do everything for me. I was willing and able to do nothing. Now I realize that I have to turn it over but I have to do my part.QUESTIONS1. Do my character defects still have me do things I do not want to do but I do them anyway and get into trouble?2. Are some of my character defects enjoyable because they give me pleasure?3. Do I really want to be able to manage my character defects or do I want to continue to be managed by them?4. Which character defects am I ready to give up?5. Can I ask God for the willingness to do what I have to do, to rid myself of the character defects I am ready to give up?6. Which character defects am I still unwilling to give up?7. Am I ready to ask God for the willingness to give up the character defects I still want to keep?STEP 7Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.In the past I thought I was alone. At times I felt rejected and abandoned. I never asked for help. Now I realize God can do for me and with me what I could not do by myself. I open up to God now and humbly ask him to change what needs changing in me.QUESTIONS1. What are your fears about changing? Can you share these fears with anyone?2. How have you already seen yourself changed?How much of this did you actually have to do?How much were you empowered to do?3. Writing letters can be a great help. Can you write a letter to God, as you understand God and talk about what bothers you andwhat you would like to see changed about you? Can you ask God to help you change those things in yourself and your life that need changing?4. If you are in doubt about what character defects to work on now, can you ask God to show you clearly what issues in your life would be improved if you would work the Sixth and Seventh Steps on them?5. Can you picture yourself as you would like to become? Can you see yourself doing and being what you would like to do and be? Can you honestly and humbly ask God to help you become that person?SIXTH STEP GUIDE?“We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.”?In doing Step Four honestly, we made a searching and fearless moral inventory of our character defects. Also, after we completed Step Five, the exact nature of our wrongs were than brought out into the open. Using both the lists, Acquired Character Defects (Step Four), and Recognition of our Wrongs (Step Five), we are now able to begin Step Six.?Step Six consists of two areas. The first area involves a detailed look at the acquired character defects that we are aware of at this point in the program. These defects range from mild (i.e., telling only half-truths to other people) to severe (i.e., using people and loving things). As we investigate these acquired defects thoroughly, we will be able to list these defects—ranging from mild to severe. At the very least, we must face up to the severe defects and take action toward their removal and attempt to control them. These severe defects are blocks to our uncovering the true inner self. They must be dealt with immediately. The milder acquired character defects may be the ones that we enjoy hanging onto. Again, we must recognize these defects that we are “comfortable” with.?The second area of Step Six is becoming entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. Readiness is the key to this step. We will need to make a brand new venture into open-mindedness. The acquired character defects that we are not, as yet, willing to take action on, may be removed if we become willing to ask God to help us to be willing. As we apply Step Six to all of our acquired character defects, without any reservations whatever, this process expands the degree of readiness. Once again, willingness, open-mindedness and honesty are absolutely essential to this step.?At this stage, if we have become aware of our acquired character defects and have the readiness to have God remove them, the question—will God remove al these defects—comes up. Step Six does not mean that we should expect all the defects to be removed as was the obsession to drink. A few of the acquired character defects may be, but with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement. Once we are aware of our acquired character defects being part of the false self, then we must exercise self-discipline. Our self-discipline, when applied to the process of patient elimination of these defects, will deepen our awareness that we must ask for God within us. Only then can we hope to conform to God’s will.?The purpose of writing the sixth step is to help us become aware of our acquired character defects—the ones we must take action on. Also, this process develops the readiness which is the key for this step.?1.????? Make a list of all the acquired defects of character that you are aware of at this time. As a starting point, use the list from Step Four and the exact nature of your wrongs from Step Five. Add to it any new defects that you have uncovered.2.????? What does “we are entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character” mean to you??3.????? How am I going to live Step Six on a daily basis??4.????? Where do you find the inspiration to have God remove all these defects of character??5.????? At this point, identify the assets of your true inner self and the liabilities of the acquired self. (The true inner self is God and the false self is the acquired character defects.) Step 7Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. SEVENTH STEP GUIDE?“We humbly asked god to remove our shortcomings.”?In the doing and living of Steps One and Two, a degree of humility, no matter how slight, was necessary when we admitted that we (the acquired false self) were powerless over alcohol/addiction, and came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity (the true inner self). In Step Three, humility allowed us to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Without humility as our guide, the uncovering and discovering of our acquired character defects (Step Four) along with the admission of the exact nature of our wrongs to God, ourselves and another human being (Step Five), could not have been possible. ?In Step Six, we first made a detailed look at our acquired character defects and proceeded to become ready to have God remove them. Step Seven is similar in nature. Looking at the exact nature of our wrongs, which we are now aware of by having done Step Five thoroughly, should make us eager to be rid of our shortcomings. The key to Step Seven is developing enough humility to ask Him to remove these shortcomings, without any reservations whatever.?The whole emphasis of Step Seven is on humility. This stem is where we make the change in our attitude which permits us, with humility, to begin the destruction of the acquired false self. Humility is a part of the true inner self (God) which allows us to move from being self-centered to being self-less. This then produces harmony with God and other people. The basic ingredient of all humility is a desire to seek and do God’s will. In order for us to be able to do God’s will, we humbly asked Him to remove our acquired shortcomings.?Since humility is the basic principle of each of the twelve steps, we might ask what is humility? In the past, we associated humility with humiliation. Certainly, each of us thought that being humble was a sign of weakness. As we grow in the program, we come to recognize humility as being absolutely necessary to our survival. Humility or the attainment of greater humility, no matter how little of it we may have now, is simply the growing awareness that ”of myself I am nothing, the Father doeth the works”. Only by a deeper awareness that of myself I am nothing, can we truly (with genuine humility) ask Him to remove our shortcomings.?The purpose of writing the seventh step is to help us to become aware of our acquired shortcomings—the ones we must take action on. In doing this, an attainment of a greater degree of humility will come if you are sick and tired of being controlled by the acquired false self. Only through humility can the true inner self start to flow forth.?1.????? What is your definition of humility??2.????? In what ways have you attained a greater degree of humility?3.????? In what ways has your attitude toward God changed since you began to work and live the steps on a daily basis.?4.????? What does “of myself I am nothing, the father doeth the works” mean to you??5.????? Do you believe that the chief activator of the acquired character defects has been self-centered fear? What are you doing to eliminate this acquired self-centered fear??6.????? What does “humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings” mean to you??7.????? How are you going to live Step Seven??8.????? Now, using the seventh step prayer as a guide, humbly ask him to remove your shortcomings!?ACTION IS THE KEY TO YOUR SURVIVAL. DO IT TODAY! STEP SEVEN Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. Principle Theme Action Defect Result Humility Begin work with God Prayer/Change False pride better behavior; reduced self-will ................
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