Boundaries for Teenagers - CPYU Parent Page
[Pages:4]January 2013
THE CENTER FOR PARENT/ YOUTH U N D E R S TA N D I N G
Helping parents understand teenagers and their world
Boundaries for Teenagers
WALT MUELLER, CPYU President
YOUTH CULTURE HOT QUOTE
For me, aspiring to be an artist at a young age, I didn't think about being a role model. But I definitely thought about being an inspiration. So I hope that I am an inspiration, especially with my work ethic and my ability to overcome obstacles.
Katy Perry, in an interview for Billboard Magazine after being named Billboard's Woman of the Year, November 30, 2012
I once heard someone define a teenager as "an When our children are little, we don't allow them to
adult waiting to happen." One reason why the wander around outside by themselves. Mom or Dad
adolescent years tend to be marked by parent/teen take them by the hand and keep a careful watch on
conflict is that teenagers believe they are adults them while they play. When we are sure that they
who deserve and can handle total freedom, while know not to wander out into the street, we might
parents might fail to recognize that their kids are let them play in the backyard by themselves. Of
growing up, resulting in never allowing them any course, we spend much of our time checking out
measure of freedom. The precarious balancing act the window or opening the door to yell, "What are
we need to perform as parents of teenagers is like you doing? Are you OK?"
holding a wet bar of soap. If you hold it too tightly it will shoot right out of your hands. If you hold it too loosely, it will fall out as well.
As our children continue to grow up, we begin to trust their judgment more and more. Soon they are able to cross the street without our assistance. They
Establishing well thought-out boundaries is very can walk to a neighbor's house or play in a friend's
important. Parents who maintain total control over yard. Before long they take long bike rides into other
their growing teens risk finding themselves with an neighborhoods. Even though we might worry about
angry and rebellious adolescent on their hands. their safety, we trust their judgment because we
Many rebellious teens I've met have grown up in have watched them make good choices on their
overly strict Christian homes. On the other hand, own. We need to implement this "going out to
parents who release all control at once may get a play" model as we set and expand the boundaries
positive reaction from their kids. After all, our kids of personal choice and responsibility. As our kids
want freedom. But they usually want that freedom begin to earn our trust, we widen the boundaries
in doses they can't yet handle. This approach is further. My father constantly used to remind me that,
like putting our kids into a boat and pushing them in our house, "privileges come with responsibility."
out into the ocean without a rudder, sail, motor, As much as those four words used to get on my
paddle, or compass. They are left to the mercy of teenaged nerves, his approach was totally right.
the environment and their own inexperience. . . and
it's a recipe for disaster.
Think about it: Read Ephesians 6:4. What does
this passage say about setting boundaries for
We need to protect our teens from themselves children and teens? How much is too little? How
and from others. They need to learn how to live much is too much? How would you rate your efforts
a disciplined life. They need to learn how to set at setting boundaries? Do you need to make any
guidelines and make responsible choices for "boundary adjustments?"
themselves. It is advisable to allow them to develop
these skills by using the "going out to play" model.
1 January 2013 |
TOP 10
Grossing Movies at the Box Office
2012
FROM THE NEWS:
1. Marvel's The Avengers 2. The Dark Knight Rises 3. The Hunger Games 4. Skyfall 5. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 6. The Amazing Spider-Man 7. Brave 8. Ted 9. Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted 10. Dr. Seuss' The Lorax
QUICK STATS
70% of the millennial generation believe that technology has robbed
us of our privacy and over a third say that
social networking has made them less satisfied with their lives.
(Euro RSCG Wordwide Poll)
At least 100,000 children across the country are sexually trafficked each year.
(National Center for Missing and Exploited Children)
INAPPROPRIATE HUMOR
One of the most intriguing news stories from late last year involved the case of the Australian radio disc jockeys and their prank call to a London hospital to get information on the condition of Kate Middleton. The pair impersonated Queen
Elizabeth and her son, Prince Charles, so effectively that two of the hospital's nurses fell for the ruse and gave out information. The radio station then broadcast the call, creating international interest in the prank. Just a couple of days later, one of the nurses was found dead, leading people to believe that she had taken her own life due to the stress caused by what was intended to be an innocent joke. This sad story hammers home how careful we must be with our attempts at humor, an issue we must discuss with our kids as they are growing up in a world where humor that hurts others is seen as normal and benign. How can we glorify God with our humor? There is nothing wrong with humor, but we must teach our kids to employ humor that is self-deprecating, rather than using humor that tears others down.
2 January 2013 |
TRENDS:
Hookah
Anti-smoking efforts targeting children and teens have typically focused on preventing the use and abuse of
cigarettes. Now, experts are calling for efforts to reduce the number of teens smoking flavored tobacco from
Hookah pipes. It seems that the use of Hookah pipes is on the rise, with 18.5% of twelfth
grade students admitting to smoking a hookah pipe during the previous year. One reason for the rise is that many teens think that smoking a hookah is safer than smoking cigarettes. But smoking a hookah is dangerous and there are serious health risks. Hookah
smoke contains many of the same toxins as cigarette tobacco and has been
associated with lung cancer and other types of respiratory illness. Of course, the best preventive effort we can put forth is
taking the time to talk to our kids about the dangers of smoking a hookah or any other type of implement. Remember, our kids think they are invulnerable and immune to any short
or long term risks or harm. Take the time to warn your kids about hookah smoke.
CPYU'S
TREND ALERT
LATEST RESEARCH:
Suicide
One of the ugliest words we can encounter is suicide. Many of us have had friends take their own lives. Many have looked into the
eyes of parents whose children took their own lives. We've all heard or read countless news stories about hopeless teenagers who found the darkness of a self-inflicted death to be better than the pain of their lives. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention now reports that almost 16% of our high-school aged teens have considered suicide, with half of those considering suicide making some attempt to take their own lives. Experts are now connecting the dots between these horrifying statistics and a technological culture that's created more avenues for the kind of bullying that leads to hopelessness. We must always be watching for the signs of suicide. And where we suspect that a student is struggling, we should ask them if they are considering suicide, and then get them Christcentered help.
Finding Christian Community on Campus
by Derek Melleby
3 January 2013 |
One of my favorite questions to ask college students is this: What was the best advice you were given before going to college? Here's a response I received recently: "My youth pastor told me to be intentional about finding Christian community. He was so emphatic about it that I remember frantically walking around campus asking everyone I met if they knew about any Christian groups. One of the first people I talked to was a Christian and she's one of my best friends today. Together we were able to find a group and get connected to a church."
This story reminds us that Christians need to intentionally seek out Christian community on campus. During the first few weeks of college, students are bombarded with different activities to fill their schedules. Many students are navigating these daily activities on their own for the first time. It's easy to drop worship and "Bible study" from an already hectic schedule. Visit collegegroups for more information to help students get connected before heading off to college.
eUPDATE
Want more information about your kids and
their world? Visit us on the web at or scan the code below with a smartphone to
subscribe to our free weekly e-Update!
FROM THE WORD
Life is never easy. Because we live in a horribly broken world, difficulty and hardships come at us from every direction. Our children and teens face circumstances that present them with challenges to their faith. As parents, the task of raising kids can be overwhelming at times.
The Apostle Paul knew what it was to encounter hardship as a follower of Jesus.
In his letter to the Philippians, Paul says that he has learned to be content in
any and every circumstance that life throws at him. Paul mentions being in need
and having much. At times he was well fed. At other times, he was hungry. He has lived
"I Can do everything
through periods of plenty and periods of want. His life was a roller-coaster ride. I'm sure all of us can identify.
through him who gives me strength."
But in spite of the ups and downs of life, Paul
Philippians 4:13
found abiding strength and contentment by living in union with Christ. God has promised His people that we will never find
ourselves in any circumstance ? no matter how dire it may seem ? that will not
include a divinely-provided way of escape. In reality, difficulty is a gift from God. It provides us with an opportunity to increase our dependence on Him as He pro-
vides us with the grace, mercy, and wherewithal to weather the storms. Nothing and nobody else in life can or will do that for us!
PARENTING resource
When Teens Stray: Parenting for the Long Haul grows out of the experiences of Scott Larson and his wife as they have taken scores of kids from juvenile jails into their homes. While Larson's experience qualifies him to write to parents whose kids have gotten into trouble, this is a book that will benefit all parents of teens. Larson begins by painting a broad stroke by laying out common myths parents hold about their kids, along with common myths parents hold about parenting. What follows is a treasure of realistic, hope-filled and practical biblically based advice that helps parents to maintain proper perspective and sanity. This book is recommended to all parents, but others who work with kids will benefit as well. With a growing number of grandparents raising their grandchildren, When Teens Stray offers them encouragement and godly wisdom during what is a most difficult job. And, youth workers and teachers will find great insights into the dynamics that drive troubled youth.
4 January 2013 |
? 2012 All rights reserved. The CPYU Parent Page is published monthly by the Center for Parent/ Youth Understanding, a nonprofit organization committed to building strong families by serving to bridge the cultural-generational gap between parents and teenagers.
Phone: (717) 361-8429 Fax: (717) 361-8964 email: cpyu@ PO Box 414, Elizabethtown, PA 17022 |
................
................
In order to avoid copyright disputes, this page is only a partial summary.
To fulfill the demand for quickly locating and searching documents.
It is intelligent file search solution for home and business.
Related download
- chapter 6 10 nickel world health organization
- the following are a list of sources and further reading
- is consumer response to plain standardised tobacco
- wto backs australia over plain cancer gold standard
- the effect the uk s smoke free law has had on smoking
- boundaries for teenagers cpyu parent page
- who cell phone use can increase possible cancer risk cnn
- in bed with wallis simpson isbn magazine
- lc paper no cb 2 914 16 17 01 legco
- the paw print post april issue
Related searches
- love quizzes for teenagers girls
- healthy eating for teenagers worksheets
- questions for teenagers game
- apps for teenagers with autism
- counseling for teenagers near me
- resume for teenagers first job
- articles for teenagers to read
- games for teenagers and adults
- psychologist for teenagers near me
- jobs for teenagers with no work experience
- books for teenagers about life
- books for teenagers to read