Timeout 3-Continuous play: A Whateley Academy Fan fiction



Timeout 3-Continuous play: A Whateley Academy Fan fiction

This is fan fiction for the Whateley Academy series. It may or may not match the timeline, characters, and continuity, but since it's fan fiction, who cares? To see the canon Whateley Stories, check out either Sapphire's Place,

() or the Big Closet ()."

Yes, it’s yet another chapter in part three of my TG/sci-fi/superhero/ magic and the kitchen sink epic. I’m much better now than when I started this, honest, though comma useage still confuses me; ask Itinerant. Your constructive criticism and advice always helps. This is an exercise in the joys of creativity and in appreciation of the wonderful Whateley Universe. Any violations of copyright, trade mark or use of real people or incidents are purely for purposes of humor or parody and done solely for the free enjoyment of the reading public. All rights reserved in perpetuity, John from Wauwatosa WI, 2005-2006. I know Joanie likes to sing Roy Orbison but she is not renaming Gracie, Clawdette.

Adult content advisory: this chapter deals with sexual topics and may not be suitable for younger readers but if you’ve read my stuff you know it’s not graphic and is often silly but you were warned.

Timeout 3

By John from Wauwatosa

Text salvage by Itinerant

Thanks to Janet Nolan for additional proofing

Chapter 6- What’s New Pussy Cat? 3, Oops I Did it Again 3, The Inverters 4, Home Improvement, I’m Ready for My Close-up, Mr. Hefner

Whateley Academy Dunwich NH, April 09-10, 2007

April 09, 2007

“How can a pair of kittens tear up a couch? We’ve had cats and they had to be pretty well grown before they could do much damage,” said Susan.

Lex kept her eyes forward, but the tone of her reply was unmistakable.

“Should I tell her, or do you want to, Joanie?”

~~I’m supposed to be the wiseacre tease here, Lex. ~~

“They are kittens. I guess you call them that, or cubs, but they’re not domestic cats. They’re about six weeks old, weigh nearly ten pounds each, absolutely unique, and irreplaceable.”

“Joanie!” Lex replied.

Lex sounded irritated -- or was she baiting me? She does have a strange sense of humor, and I love her for it.

“What are they Aun … Ms. Joanie, tiger cubs? You told Mom they weren’t lions.”

“Oh, they’re not lions,” Lex and I said in stereo.

Pinky was smart, and kept out of it, content to simply snicker.

“Joanie is fine. Don’t ever refer to me by the A_u_blank_blank title again, Suzy, it could get you killed. I love hearing you say the word. It almost makes me cry, but it’s not safe dear. What Officer Susan Alexis Luther wants me to say is, I rescued them during a test of my time travel power. They’re native to North America circa 9500BC. They’re smilodons.”

Suzy looked puzzled then excited. She asked.

“Saber-tooths? You have saber-tooths?”

“They only have their milk teeth so it’s not obvious now. They look a bit like adult Manx cats.”

~~Body-builder Manx cats with a short tail.~~

“They are one of the saber-tooth cats and will get a lot bigger as they mature, nearly as big as African lions. I’m planning on having them trained as police cats, sort of Dobermans on steroids,” I said.

“Aren’t you afraid they’ll try to eat you?”

“They have, actually. My nipples will attest to that.”

“What?” Suzy shrieked.

“They weren’t fully weaned and I made the mistake of sleeping in the nude. I woke to, well, now I know why some women are afraid to breast feed, ouch! … Luther, watch the road, you nearly drove off the edge! I guess that means I’m officially their Mommy now, but I will have several empath/telepaths, and a police dog trainer work with my furry friends and me to get us properly trained. Now that you’ve settled down, Lex, how well have they been eating?”

“They’re both hungry kitties, that’s for sure. They lap up the formula eagerly, and seem to go for the moistened Purina Lion Cub Chow.”

“I hope I can find a satisfactory dry, big cat food. The thought of them ambushing a cow for breakfast several times a week is not an appealing image. I can get some cutter and canner cattle if I have to, but that’s all the more reason I need to find and build a secure home off campus, but near Whateley.”

“Would you take them back to your room before it gets to that point?” said Lex faking sarcasm.

“As soon as I get Suzy settled in, Lex. Don’t worry, I’ll pay for a new couch. Hell, get a whole living room set, I can afford it.” Lex seemed much happier.

When she dropped us off at Administration, I said discreetly, ”Thanks for wearing the contacts, the eye patch would be a bit much for Suzy right now. Oh, how are you and, you know, your girlfriend doing?”

This was a tough area to get Lex to talk about, but I was hoping she’d open up. I was glad for the lovely woman. She seemed so lonely at times. It was as if her life had been turned upside down at some point and the memories occasionally haunted her.

“That’s our business, but we’re fine.”

Gees, she said something about it, finally. Then she got this predatory look in her good eye, I preferred not to see what was in the other. I’d done it one time by accident. It wasn’t pleasant, but I was otherwise unaffected. She told me most people go off-line for a while when they see into the eye the magic affected. She thinks she can use that to advantage in dangerous situations.

“A sort of built in Tazer,” I suggested once, and got one of those looks of amused disapproval she’s so good at.

I may look at it again sometime but it will be when I’m ready, and not one minute before.“How is your BOY friend, Joanie, still under the statutory rape age?”

~~’A full spread of photon torpedoes and phasers? Hard about Sulu, we’re gonna ram this sucker!’ Two can play this game, girlie. ~~

“Yeah Lex, he’s still fourteen and am I glad. He was amazing last night, such stamina, and so energetic, ooooh!” I cooed.

Lex’s jaw dropped, then I laughed so hard I had to run for the nearest women’s room.

“Oh you!” I could hear her shout after me.

* * * *

I offered to help out by sharing my linen closet with Suzy, but Student Services found her something in Dickenson. Her roomie is a sister shape shifter from Savanna, Georgia – say that fast five times.

~~Could be worse, could be Sioux Falls, South Dakota.~~

I swear, someday my sense of humor will get me into serious trouble. Suzy had lived in Atlanta, and other southern cities, for most of her life. Her parents got transferred many times between Federal Reserve Banks, primarily those in the South, so they should get along – the similar cultural backgrounds will help.

Administration got Suzy’s ID and intro package together in record time. Dr Sara had informed Ms. Carson of Ms. Kenner’s’ unique relationship “relative” to me, and Ms. Carson had pulled out all the stops. Ms. Hartford was unusually polite in dealing with an incoming student, but then she knew what I thought about duty to friends and family. She had to know, but said nothing -- quid pro quo, I guess. I gave Suzy the quick campus tour and dropped off excused absence slips for Pinky’s missed morning classes.

* * * *

Suzy and I went to Security to pick up the kittens.

They were in a travel kennel on top of a desk and pawed excitedly through the bars when they saw me.

“I missed you too, little ones. Come and meet my friend, Suzy.”

I took them out of the cage. We sat on chairs next to the kennel.

“Joanie, they’re as big as adult cats -- bigger I think.”

“My, you two have grown! Lex must have taken good care of you,” I said in a cutesy voice.

“Is it okay for me to hold one?” Suzy pleaded.

“Here’s George. The boys are usually more outgoing – at least they are with domestic cats. Be a good smilie, George. Suzy’s precious to me, just like you.”

I scratched him behind the ears and rubbed the side of my face against him, marking him. I kept making soft high pitched sounds to comfort him. Gracie was content to curl up tight on my lap and purr.

“Oooh, George, you have such soft fur. Can I pet you?” Suzy said as she let George sniff her hand.

He settled down on her lap and she gently petted and scratched him. Soon his purr motor was going. Maybe it was instinct, or mother’s intuition, or just maybe my empathic gift kicked in, because I got this sense of absolute love and contentment. It seemed to be coming from the smilodons. I got out the figure eight harnesses and leashes, and carefully put them on my babies.

Dear d/j/w, why did I call them my babies? But I do so want to have a baby; many babies, with Eric and my genes they’ll … He’s only fourteen, he’s only fourteen, he’s built like a Ghod in training but he’s only fourteen.

~~Mental memo to self: never, ever, be alone with Eric for any length of time. I’ll jump his bones for sure. What is it with me? Am I that kind of a girl, the kind of girl that is so in love with the idea that Prince Charming and a baby will make my life complete that I have no control over my desire? I used to think the young women I worked with were so foolish to get pregnant by some slick talking Neanderthal. They’d admit -- after-the-fact -- ‘he’ had nothing going for him other than looks and a dick, and here I am falling for a similar trap. Thank the Ghods Eric is a good person and not some opportunist looking to score. I have got to find an outlet for my passion other than stroking myself. It eases the tension alright, but I find I’m fantasizing about Eric more and more. I worry I won’t be able to separate fact from fiction when we meet again. I could never forgive myself if I violated his and his family’s trust that way.~~

“Come on babies, up on our shoulders. We‘re going home,” I said.

I gently picked up George, and set him on Suzy’s shoulder, and did likewise with Gracie on mine.

“Won’t they fall off, or get scared?” Suzy asked.

“Smilodons were suspected of being excellent tree climbers given their anatomy and claws. It will be easier than carrying the kennel and safer than walking them.”

* * * *

We left Security for Poe, Suzy merrily chatting all the way.

“Wow girls, what a great pair of pussies!” said a familiar voice behind us.

“Excuse me one moment, Suzy. Why don’t you sit on the lawn, and play with George and Gracie?”

I turned to see Peeper grinning at me. That turned to a worried look when he saw who he had just propositioned, then to a look of panic. It wasn’t totally his fault -- well the off-color remark was -- but I was not in my normal Whateley clothes. I was still in stealth mode from our trip and was wearing a baseball cap for my hair which was further tucked inside my blouse.

“I am so sorry, Ms. Joanie, I …”

“Stuff it, Peeper, before I do something we will both regret. Though in your case, you might not live long enough to experience it. I will say this once, and you will remember it. The lovely young woman you propositioned is a new mutant I had the privilege of rescuing a few days back. Naturally, she is very dear to me. If I hear of anyone mistreating her, insulting her, or, Ghod forbid, harming her, they will hear from me. I’m not saying to treat her with kid gloves, just with restraint. Suzy needs to learn to survive in the real world, and I don’t want anything, or anyone, to interfere with that, got it?”

I was livid at his insulting dear Suzy. I didn’t like it either. I didn’t want to see the expression on my face -- certainly Peeper didn’t. I smelled something, and noticed a growing stain near his crotch. Maybe I've learned that trick of Big Red's?

“Go and get cleaned up, and pass the word; anyone who harms Miss Susan Kenner is my personal punching bag. Now go!”

Peeper ran off towards Twain Hall at a full sprint. Somehow, I frightened him; harmless little ol’ me? I restrained myself until he was out of sight, then the dam burst.

“Gees, am I pissed.”

I started laughing so hard I had to lie back on the lawn.

I slowly calmed down and my smilodon friends came and nuzzled me -- two particular parts of me.

“Are they trying to nurse?” Suzy said her eyes wide, and wet from her own tears; she’d been laughing hard, too.

“Yah, smart creatures, aren’t they. Here we go, Gracie,” I said as I sat up, put her back on my shoulders and stood up. “It’s time to get them home.”

* * * *

We got them settled in my linen closet. Suzy got a kick out of the fact the plaque on the door said “Linen Stores”, and not “Room 318 A” or “Joan Brown.” My cork board on the door did have my name and schedule on it.

I posted my schedule for good reason. Those who wished me harm could find it out easy enough, anyway, and I wanted my friends to know were I was. Also, I get preoccupied at times and it’s a great reminder, like sticking a note on the ‘fridge door. I had a small pad of Post-its, a pen, and lots of spare thumbtacks up as well, so people could leave notes. I was always looking for more to tryout for my band.

“I’m surprised they have a simple tan coat. I thought they’d be striped like a tiger,” Susy told me.

“They’re primarily grassland hunters of the far north. Tigers have stripes because they’re jungle and forest hunters. A dull tan with minimal markings is the best camouflage for grasslands. In many ways they’re like African lions, just from a much colder climate.”

We fed them and then Suzy and I headed off to the Crystal Hall for our lunch. I made a mental note to get them a bigger scratching post. I had an idea where I could get one cheap.

* * * *

I was happy to see Tom and Tina Smith sitting at my preferred table, and Cheryl womaning a cash register. Manning didn’t fit somehow and personing is too PC for my taste, and I am from Wisconsin. Doesn’t anyone remember Donna E. Shalala?

“Suzy, see the petite brunette cashiering? Call her Britney Spears when we check out. Don’t bother with the ID card they gave you. Lunch is my treat.”

I tousled her hair, which made her giggle. She tickled me back, I nearly peed.

~~I hope Eric never finds out about my ‘weakness’, I’ll be helpless before him. Hum? ~~

We started picking out our food after I warned her to read the labels carefully. We took our booty to checkout. Cheryl was charming as usual.

“ID card?” she said in her New Jersey accent.

~~Sounds like a lower pitched Fran Dresser. ~~

“Sorry, my friend behind me is paying,” said Suzy.

“Heard that one before. Get out your card newbie, you’re holding up the line.”

“Ring hers up with mine, Britney,” I said from behind Suzy.

“You again? I should have known, Joanie,” Cheryl growled.

~~My, she’s taking this well. ~~

She rang us up then whispered to Suzy.

“Be careful around this one; she’s a bad influence.”

“I will, Ms. Spears,” Suzy whispered back.

“Joanie, you … you …“Cheryl sputtered.

“Yes, I am one, aren’t I. Come on Suzy, lets eat!”

We sat down next to the twins.

“Tom and Tina Smith, this is Susan or Suzy Kenner,” I said. I looked to see if we were clear. “She’s a new mutant from Wisconsin, and an Ultra-X-Amine homolog victim,” I whispered the last bit.

“I’m so sorry,” said Tina.

“Me too, and you’re cute, Suzy. Seeing anyone?” said Tom. He’d been eying her up and down, his smile growing all the while.

~~Making the moves already, Slick?~~

“It’s okay, I look like I used to except for the eye color. I have these great powers and how else would I have met my Aunt… Oh crap!” Suzy said in frustration.

I tried to shush them. Fortunately, the Crystal Hall is noisy at lunchtime and no one else heard her.

“Joanie is your…” Tom stared to say.

I gave him a look that would weld battleship armor plate.

“No one ever mentions ‘that’ fact again. It’s too dangerous, understand?” I tried next to calm them.

“It’s not that I’m unhappy with the ‘situation’,” I made quote marks in the air. “But I have enemies who wish to use my abilities for their purposes, just as you three are vulnerable to that same threat.”

“Like from spies and organized crime, Joanie?” Tina asked.

“Exactly. Anyone closely associated with the public ‘me’ is at risk as well because I’m so well known. Be careful and Whateley will teach you what you need to know to survive. That’s enough of the morbid stuff, gang. Why don’t you tell each other about your selves and your powers, and what it’s like at Whateley?” I said. “Okay if Suzy tags along with you two? I have some things I need to do.”

~~ ‘There’s no need to fear, Underdog is here!’ I must be in good mood if I’m this silly. ~~

“Sure, Joanie. We’ll keep Suzy safe,” said Tom smiling. Tina nodded her head.

“Good. You have my number and Security can always locate me. Call me for any reason; I don’t mind. I’ll try and be here for dinner at six, but let’s agree to meet outside the main door of Dickenson at 7:45AM and have a group breakfast. I’ll probably bring Pinky with me, as we run at 7AM most mornings. If you’re feeling up to it, I’ll see if the Anderson twins will host a slumber party Saturday night.”

“What about my brother?” asked Tina.

“Are you interested in police gadgets, Tom? I could have some friends at Security give you a look at what they do. Not the patrolling, but the situation room, CCTV system, and things like that. I could schedule a Saturday night film fest at the Crystal Hall. I donated the widescreen TV.”

“I like gadgets and stuff, sure. Can’t I come to the sleepover?”

“And ogle half naked girls as we oil our bodies and shave each other's privates. I think not.”

Tom's eyes went wide. Then I giggled.

“You’re silly, Joanie. I like you,” said Suzy.

“You too.” Then I gave her a hug, and an Auntie's kiss. I whispered in her ear. “Never forget it. You need me for anything, call -- you're family.”

I broke from Suzy, and saw Tom smiling at her -- too suavely for my taste. I suspected he was eying her as a possible date and more. Then I gazed lower on his body. I was shocked. She was eliciting from him the same tell-tale, um, physical response many men gave me. I raised my eyes to his and glared at him with a ferocity that worries me still.

“Tom, if you get Suzy pregnant, I’ll kill you. Nothing personal.”

* * * *

Ms. Hartford was at her desk, prim and grim as ever, but she almost smiled as I neared her.

“Before you speak, I need to say how grateful I am for you having taken care of Pinky this weekend. I see you managed to maintain your low profile -- cold water rescue on camera, national radio appearance, seen hanging in the presence of major movers and shakers in American politics.”

“These things happen to me. I don’t plan them, I swear!”

“Yes, Ms. Joanie, but please be more careful next time.”

“Next time?”

“Absolutely, Pinky was gushing like a little girl on Christmas morning describing her adventures with you and your MSG friends. I heard the broadcast, and saw a portion of the web cast of your appearance on 'A Prairie Home Companion'. Your friend, Ms. Tina Anderson, recorded them and insisted we watch some earlier. She’s a big fan of the show and of you, Joanie. Though I’d prefer Pinky remain anonymous, it would be a waste of talent if she did not perform. She sounded and looked wonderful, and the expression of joy on her face was obvious. You’ve restored my happy, carefree, niece, and I thank you for that, as annoying as it will be to have two of you here. What do you want, Ms. Joanie?”

“Who here knows the local real estate market? I’m looking to buy or build a home near Whateley -- the closer the better.”

“Ah, your cats, I take it?”

“That, and I hope to start a family someday. My linen closet would hardly suffice.”

“Ms. Anderson has some knowledge from her and her sister’s search for housing, and some of the Security officers could be sources. Your best contact is the community representative on the Whateley board, Mrs. Potter. I don’t see eye-to-eye with her, but no one knows Dunwich and the surrounding area better.”

“Mrs. Potter sounds ideal, and I thank you for putting personal feelings aside.”

* * * *

~~Just to cover my butt, I’ll ask Chief Delarose and Charlie about Mrs. Potter, though I think Ms. Hartford was speaking the truth.~~

Delarose and Mr. Lodgeman confirmed Mrs. Potter was a good suggestion, so I made arrangements through Charlie to meet with her the next day.

* * * *

April 10, 2007

I had no classes Tuesday morning so, as the weather was mild, I rode my vintage Harley into Dunwich. I parked outside a quaint – the town does cater to summer tourists – coffee shop. I stripped off my riding clothes, brushed my hair, straightened my business suit, slipped on a pair of dress pumps, and touched up my makeup. I checked myself in one of the cycle’s mirrors before I walked into the shop.

~~Not bad, professional and adult -- okay, I still look like a high school girl but at least I look sharp, and presentable. The knee length skirt was the right choice. ~~

“I’m here to meet Mrs. Potter,” I informed the proprietress.

She led me to a table, where an elegant older woman sat. She looked of indeterminate age, though Charlie said she was roughly 60. Mrs. Potter projected an air of confidence and of restrained power. What I knew of her said she was a force in the local scene, but not arrogant about it. She could be a great friend, or a powerful opponent. She gestured for me to sit, and then she spoke.

“Good morning, Ms. Brown, Mr. Lodgeman has told me all about you.”

“Good morning, Mrs. Potter, and thank you for meeting me on such short notice. Mr. Lodgeman told you everything about me and you’re still willing to meet me?” I smiled; she gave me a motherly look.

“Charlie said you don’t take yourself seriously, but to never underestimate you. I take what Charlie says seriously. He’s a good man to have as your friend.”

“I like him too, Mrs. Potter. I act the way I do, because I fear if I take myself too seriously, life won’t be worth living. I’m still getting used to all this.” I motioned along my body. “I’ve been given a great gift and I don’t wish to waste it.”

“From what Charlie says, and what I know of you, you’re doing well. I must applaud what you’re doing for your student friends. I wouldn’t want Ms. Conners to end up like her Aunt.”

“That will not happen, I promise you. Ms. Hartford doesn’t want that either.” Mrs. Potter nodded. “Can you help me?”

“Charlie explained your situation, and I know the very person you need. She’s reliable, and discreet -- a must in your case.”

She handed me a business card with some writing on it, then gently, yet firmly, grabbed my hands. I felt an indescribable sensation. Mrs. Potter got a look of surprise on her face, and then smiled beatifically. She spoke like a mother to her dearest child.

“Don’t worry, my dear. Your life may seem dark at times, but your friends, family, and soul mate will pull you through. My word, Joanie, you’ll be a busy mother!”

She excused herself and left. My thoughts were spinning.

~~First my great, great, whatever grandfather, now Mrs. Potter. How many children will I have? Suzy’s grandmother gave birth to seven. The World record for live births is 63, I think … NOOOOO! ~~

I asked the proprietress, “Mrs. Potter made a prediction about my future; do you know what that was about?”

“Mrs. Potter is a gentle and enigmatic woman, but doesn’t suffer fools lightly. You must have impressed her to get that much personal time. She’s a talented precognitive. I’ve never heard of one of her predictions being wrong.”

“Oh Ghod!” I whimpered.

* * * *

I rode a short distance to the edge of town, several of the residents waving politely at me as I passed. My cycle is distinctive. The address was a lovingly maintained Queen Anne Victorian. The realtor’s offices were in a wing to one side that appeared to be a converted solarium and green house. I got back out of my riding clothes, and rang the bell. A slender woman, in her upper twenties, of Native American ancestry, opened the door. She had a momentary look of surprise and delight. I wondered if she was a fan.

“Ms. Brown, I’ve been expecting you. Mrs. Potter told me of your unique requirements, and I have several possibilities. Sorry, I didn’t introduce myself, I’m Ms. Theresa Juneau.”

She smiled easily, and offered her a hand, then surprised me with a hug.

“My, you are a big girl, Ms. Brown. I wish I had a figure like yours.”

She looked at me intensely; her smile seemed more sensual than before.

“You're no slouch in the looks department yourself, Ms. Juneau. Are you any relation to Solomon Juneau, the French American fur trapper who helped found Milwaukee? Your name is the same as his beloved Native American wife. It suits you well.”

“Thank you, Ms. Brown, and yes, I believe they were distant relatives.”

“Joanie, please,” I replied. Ms. Juneau's smile grew wider.

“That’s where I know you from. The word around town is Whateley has a famous young singer as one of their staff; so it is you. Please call me Tessa. I’m a fan of yours, Joanie. I love my name, but Tessa is so friendly sounding -- a must in my profession. I had trouble pronouncing my name when I was little and it stuck.”

“You understand my needs, Tessa?” I asked.

Her smile became almost feral for a second.

“Near enough to Whateley for safety and convenience -- critical with your being so well known -- a large enough structure, or sufficient land, to build a secure home for your eventual family and guests, and land and buildings suitable to the long term care of two large cats. This last request is odd. Are these exotics, like tigers or leopards?” Tessa asked.

Now Tessa’s smile looked friendly, but professional, that struck me as odd. She appeared as if engaged in some internal struggle with her emotions, but why?

“You could say that. They’re extremely rare and valuable, so I need their quarters to be secure as well,” I replied.

“I have a couple small farms that may do. One is just down the road from your Dr. Bellow's place.”

“The location would be ideal. Can you show it to me today, Tessa?”

“Certainly. You do realize New England properties can be expensive,” Tessa warned.

“If Mrs. Potter says you are the best, I’ll trust you to get me a fair price. I will be paying with a bank check if that helps. I don’t need a loan, or want one -- too much risk of publicity.”

Tessa got a knowing look on her face.

“That’s right, you have been doing well as an entertainer. I can guarantee the owner will be discreet. We don’t want urban sprawl to infest the area, or tacky tourism. The last thing Dunwich wants to be is Branson East.”

I giggled softly in response.

“I’m not planning on building a theater, just a home, Tessa,” I said, then continued to snicker.

“Do you want to ride in my Blazer, or follow on your cycle?”

“I’ll ride with you, that way we can talk,” I said.

She seemed pleased with my decision. I noticed that her truck’s built-in organizer/cup holder/center console held a number of CD’s in their jewel cases. Prominent among them were the distinctive colors and markings of both of mine.

She described various points of interest and properties she had sold, should I want references. She showed me the other farm first. It wasn’t bad, 30 acres with a lived-in house and solid out buildings. But it was on the wrong side of Whate, which would necessitate a longer commute in winter than I’d like. And, it was equally inconvenient to Dunwich and Berlin, where I caught all my charter flights. The farm near Dr. Bellows home caught my eye at once.

~~This is it, I’m home!~~ I thought, though I tried to conceal my enthusiasm.

“I can tell you’ve fallen in love with it, Joanie. I’m a low level empath, your excitement was deafening. And no, I won’t raise the price too much.”

We both laughed and I gave her a friendly hug. She hugged me back and kissed me hard on the lips, her tongue dancing with mine for a moment and then we broke apart.

“Why did you do that? Not that I minded, Tessa. You’re attractive and a great kisser. I find it flattering you think I’m desirable.”

“I prefer women, Joanie, and I just had to try it once with you. You don’t know how your body and voice excite me. I know that’s unprofessional, but I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t tell you.”

I do admire honesty. I was just surprised she admitted her attraction so quickly.

“I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t say part of me is tempted to take you up on the implied invitation, but I’m becoming serious about someone and I wouldn’t feel right about it. I could introduce you to the Anderson …”

“Tina and Chris, the minxes. We’ve met. And no, I haven’t slept with them, well not in some time.”

“I’m afraid they never mentioned you.”

I was confused. I knew from how they acted with me they were no virgins, but still... My relationship with the Anderson’s was becoming that of girls who are close friends, and not that of girlfriends and sex partners. It was a disappointment, but safer for the three of us. My intensifying relationship with Eric was the biggest reason I was not their lover.

“We had a minor fight when I moved out of the area for a year, and we drifted apart after that,” Tessa explained.

“I’m sorry you broke up. They’re good friends to me.” We wandered in and out of the buildings.

“I still like the girls, but it’s not to be. What do you think of the place? Fifty three acres, fifteen in second growth mixed hardwoods and white pine. It’s a former dairy farm -- just forage crops for the last few decades. The owner retired and moved south to the Carolinas. Since the last renter left in the mid 1980’s the farmhouse has been unoccupied.”

We walked through the house. It needed a lot of TLC.

“The farm house is in poor shape. The roof is leaking, the plaster is damaged, and a window is partially out. It needs roof repairs, and the window replaced ASAP if it’s to be salvaged. It could make a nice rental property or guest house.

“I’m more interested in the barn. The timber frame looks sound. I think if some of the gadgeteers from Whateley and a structural engineer could look at the place, it may work. I’d jack the building, dig a full basement, pour a reinforced concrete foundation, then reattach the barn to it. The structure would need extensive reinforcement and upgrading, but from the outside it would change little. Give me a detailed land survey and description. I’ll hire an engineer and get my tech friends to check it out. You may have a sale, Tessa.”

I got this wickedly silly thought and couldn’t restrain myself.

“Oh and …”

I gave her a big hug and kissed her back passionately. I threw in a loving squeeze of her firm butt for good measure, then I backed away and smiled.

“Wow, Joanie! I’m not lowering my commission, though I think you just earned a big reduction in the closing costs. If we’d gone any farther, I’d do it for free. If your girlfriend or boyfriend dumps you, give me a call. Being a professional singer is a waste. You should be a professional lover.”

I broke out giggling, and she soon joined me.

She drove me back to my cycle and promised to deliver the papers to Whateley Administration by noon the next day. It was past noon, so I hustled to Whateley for my afternoon classes and to check on my babies.

* * * *

George and Gracie greeted me eagerly and soon purred contentedly as they stuffed themselves with the food I set out. I brushed their fur, cleaned their litter box, and changed for class. I wore my student uniform with its short skirt; my hair held in a banana clip, and looked like a proper student -- or a refugee from a porn shoot. I looked in the mirror and giggled at my appearance.

~~I look like a hybrid of Lolita and Little Annie Fannie with just a touch of Sailor Moon. ~~

Oh well, compared to many on campus, I was normal. I was leaving my second and last class when I got paged on my security radio.

“Timeout to Administration, Timeout to Administration, you have a visitor -- over.”

I acknowledged receiving the message, and ran to Administration.

~~That was a strange message, who would be visiting me? ~~

There was a stretch limo in front of Administration, a bad omen. The next ‘things’ I noticed were a pair of tall, busty young women in designer clothes. I found myself studying them intensely.

~~They have to be models. They’re nearly as tall and busty as me, but my legs are nicer, and she’s not a natural blond, and my breasts are firmer, and real, and the black-haired girl’s wearing colored contacts, no way her eyes are that blue… Ghod, I’m comparing myself to other women. Am I that vain? Anyway, the blonde’s butt is too big, and her waist... I am that vain. When did this happen? Why am I babbling on like this? I’m usually not this way unless I’m nervous about something. What have I got to be nervous about?~~

There was something about what I’d seen that worried me, but I couldn’t bring the thought into focus. A stretch limo and two exceptionally attractive, well dressed women. It smelled of an entourage, but whose? I knew the answer. I just couldn’t think of it at that moment.

“Ms. Brown, you have a visitor. He’s waiting in Ms. Carson’s office.”

Ms. Hartford sounded so cheerful and was smiling.

~~I’m dead. ~~

“Is this where I say, 'we who are about to die salute you?'”

The office staff stifled giggles. Ms. Hartford kept smiling.

“I know, it’s the FBI here to take me to Alcatraz?” I suggested.

“Better,” said Ms. Hartford, then she laughed.

In Ms. Carson’s office was a man my father’s age, trim, impeccably dressed, and frighteningly familiar.

~~Not him? I said I couldn’t make it. ~~

“Joanie dear, this is ...” Ms. Carson started to say.

“Hugh Hefner, I recognize him.”

I now realized what I’d been so nervous about -- the upcoming photo shoot. My mind was so ablaze with conflicting thoughts and emotions that I don’t believe I was thinking straight. Why else couldn’t I resist saying it?

“Visiting a former girlfriend?”

Ms. Carson shot me a look. Mr. Hefner broke out in a laugh.

~~Don’t tell me they were? ~~ I thought, my eyes going wide.

"Ms. Carson posed for us, when was it, dear lady?”

“December 1961,” she said, and then my jaw dropped.

“You were in Playboy?” I asked. My eyes tried to climb out of their sockets.

“She was the Playmate of the Month, and of the Year -- one of our best. I tried to persuade her to date me, but her duties as a super precluded that,” he said.

“Being a super is a bitch, I know. So, I’m not the first mutant to pose, just the first to be publicly announced as one?”

“I did it as a dare under a pseudonym to raise money for the supers group I was with. Government funds were drying up as the Cold War wound down. Mr. Hefner’s been most generous over the years and the photos were in good taste -- nothing salacious,” said Ms. Carson.

“Call me Hugh. My friends do, and Ms. Carson has for years.”

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

~~Like you don’t know, Joanie. ~~

“I wanted to meet you and your actions last week saving the young woman convinced me to come to you here. I’d like to interview you myself as a preliminary to the big interview our professional writer will do. You’re too important to leave anything to chance,” Mr. Hefner said.

“I’m flattered, but you know I can’t reveal anything about my family, or Whateley for their and my safety,” I replied.

“Ms. Carson and you will have final editorial authority over everything related to you, your families, or Whateley -- text and photos included. I, too, recognize the value of keeping a secret, as Ms. Carson can attest. Before we go any further, Ms. Brown, you are the most attractive young woman I have had the pleasure of meeting, with the exception of Ms. Carson. Your donation to Whateley of every cent we are paying you is a generous act, dear lady.”

Oh my, that had me going. Things stated snapping to attention and making ready for action... all over.

~~I knew I should have gotten some relief after Ms. Juneau and I fooled around. Now, Ms. Libido, if we do what you want to do, it will kill him, though it would be a glorious death. Talk about going out with a bang. ~~

Okay, so my internal voice is a potty mouth, big deal.

“When do we start?” I asked politely.

In my state, I sounded like I was propositioning him. I felt wicked and aroused.

“Security has made arrangements. You can start at any time, Joan,” Ms. Carson said.

~~The things I do to stay faithful to you, Eric. ~~

“Mr. Hefner, are you allergic to cats?”

* * * *

To be continued

Thanks again to Itinerant and Janet Nolan for their assistance

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