Caleb Britt - Mrs. Dewey's Class



Sample Student

Ms. Butterfield

English, Period 2A

16 September 2012

Narrative Essay: First Rough Rough Draft

It was a great week to camp up at the wonderful Pinecrest Lake in the nice 80 degree weather during the summer of 2011, especially with the McMusterseeds, and of course, my family. All of us were ecstatic to go camping, but especially the boys because we had brought along our airsoft guns, planning to have an airsoft war. As the smell of pine trees filled our noses and dirt surrounded our car after the dreadful drive, we had entered the campgrounds. We were all excited to camp at Pinecrest, but we were all, to soon, going to learn the importance of safety around airsoft guns.

After setting up our camping area, it was dinner time. I could smell the aroma of the delicious hot dogs and soupy refried beans my mom and Mrs. McMusterseed had prepared. Next, we all played some great card games, some of which I hadn’t heard of. Around 7:30 p.m., it was time to pack up the goods so the raccoons and bears wouldn’t get to it overnight.

“Goodnight everybody!” I shouted as we all climbed into our tents.

“Goodnight honey” I heard my mom say back as I laid in embarrassment.

I was sharing a tent with one of my best buds, Justin McMusterseed. The top of the bright red tent was exposed so Justin and I had a light during the night and could see the great universe. As we both started whispering to each other while everyone was falling asleep, one, no TWO shooting stars raced across the sky as we both gazed upon them. The night went on with many gallant shooting stars flying through the sky as Justin and I counted them. When Justin finally dozed off, I had counted off 26 shooting stars! I dreamt of many adventurous things and fell off into a heavy sleep.

As I slowly woke up, I heard the jumble of dishes and heard whispering outside the tent. I zipped it open and slipped on my shoes as I saw my mom and Mrs. McMusterseed talking. Walking over to the tables, I felt the pine needles crunching beneath my feet. We talked for awhile until everyone was awake and ready for breakfast. We all ate scrambled eggs with many tasty spices and vegetables prepared in a bag, which cooked in boiling water. After a scrumptious breakfast, we boys decided to get ready for our first airsoft war. We planned to have it across the road behind us on an abandoned lot with dirt and rubble. I got my first ever little pistol out and borrowed another little automatic Justin had. The other boys prepared their stuff, and then we all safely crossed the road and walked up the steep hill and onto the field. After some collaboration, we split up into fair teams.

“READY…SET…GOOO!” I shouted out to begin the war.

The war was intense as I was getting pelted with little bullets. We ran around the playing field like chickens with their heads cut off. When we all had become very tired, we headed down to our campground and the lunch we had all been waiting for was complete. It was macaroni salad, grilled chicken, and rolls with fiery red Hawaiian punch. After lunch, some of the boys went to their tents, but Justin, my mom, and Mrs. McMusterseed remained outside. I walked around with Connor talking with my pistol in hand, shooting at a tree every once in awhile.

We arrived back at camp and Justinwent to grab his little semi automatic. He fired a few shots at me from behind his mom’s car with his head popped up above the hood of the car.

I shot a few bullets at him and then I heard him scream,” OWWWWW!”

I said back,” What, what happened!”

Everybody ran towards him as he lay on the ground balling and not being able to speak. I thought in my mind, Oh no, I killed him, great, now what are we going to do? I ran and retrieved ice for his throat where I had shot him. When everything settled down, we took a look at his poor red throat. I ended up shooting him right on his Adams apple. I didn’t talk to him for the rest of the day. At dinner I could tell he was having trouble eating but was still managed to choke it down. That night, I lay in my hot sleeping bag thinking about the day with Justin sleeping comfortably next to me.

That night taught me a great lesson which was to be taken into consideration and it was to be careful with airsoft guns and don’t mistreat their use. And to this day, nothing like that has happened…yet.

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