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A HANDBOOK FOR DEVELOPING

A

PEER SUPPORT GROUP

DEFINITION OF A PEER SUPPORT GROUP

A GROUP OF PEERS WHO MEET

ON A REGULAR BASIS FOR THE

PURPOSE OF ENCOURAGEMENT,

SUPPORT AND NURTURE.

INSPIRATIONAL THOUGHT

Let us laugh together,

Listen to one another’s words,

Lean on one another’s strength,

Love one another from an honest heart.

Then nothing we face will seem too big for us to overcome.

HOW CAN A PEER SUPPORT GROUP HELP YOU?

1. Can help develop deep friendships.

2. Can produce a sense of belonging.

3. Can help participants gain a different perspective.

4. Can help develop self-esteem.

5. Can help you get in touch with your feelings.

6. Can provide affirmation.

7. Can provide accurate feedback.

8. Can provide encouragement and accountability.

9. _____________________________________

10. ____________________________________

“So encourage each other to build each other up, just as you are already doing” (1 Thess. 5:11, TLB).

HOW TO DEVELOP A PEER SUPPORT GROUP

I. Send out a questionnaire in your association to find out who would be interested in starting a peer support group. Get the addresses of your peers from your associational director of missions. Send the questionnaire to the homes, not the churches.

On the questionnaire ask:

A. Would you like to be part of a peer support group?

B How often would you like to meet? (1) once a month (2) once a quarter (3) other

C. What time of day could you meet? (1) morning (2) noon (3) afternoon (4) evening

D. What are some of your needs/interests?

II. Schedule a special event (luncheon, tea, retreat, etc.). Wives who are interested at all should be invited to attend. Send information to give them an idea what a peer support group is and what it has to offer. This information should also be shared at the special event.

III. If possible, at the special event, decide on the time and place for the first meeting. Remember, there may be someone interested in being part of a peer support group who could not attend the special event.

IV. Develop a commitment sheet or card, to be signed, making a commitment to give attendance to the group meetings a high priority (don’t miss except for vital reasons). Also, be sure to include a commitment of confidentiality.

SAMPLE

PEER SUPPORT GROUP COMMITMENT CARD

Recognizing the value of a peer support group in my life, I promise to make

every effort to be present at every meeting and special events. Furthermore,

in respect to the other group members I resolve to maintain the highest level

of confidentiality.

Signed ______________________________________

Date ______________________________________

V. In your association:

A. Try to have information often in your association’s newsletter and Web page.

B. Get your meetings and special events in the annual calendar.

C. Give testimonies each year at the associational annual meeting.

GROUP ESSENTIALS

1. CONFIDENTIALITY—This is a basic requirement. No member of the support group is to repeat anything shared within the group.

2. PRIORITY—Always attend unless providentially hindered. Notify when not attending. Do not attend just when you have a problem.

3. PARTICIPATION—Every member is expected to participate. Openness breeds trust; lack of participation can breed distrust.

4. NO OFFICERS—No one person controls the group.

5. CONVENER—Someone has to keep the session moving. This could be on a rotating system.

6. PURPOSE—Should be clearly stated and kept before the group. Don’t make this specifically a prayer group. Use practical application of prayer as much as possible.

“When one helps another, both are strong” (German proverb).

GROUP SESSION FORMAT

1. Set a specific time for each meeting.

2. Determine the frequency of the meetings.

3. Select a meeting place.

4. Sit where everyone can see each other.

5. Be sure the room ensures privacy.

6. Convener calls the group to order and makes sure time is not wasted. Keep the dialogue flowing.

7. Agenda—Determined in advance by the group. Reminders of the upcoming meeting and agenda can be made by phone, e-mail, et cetera.

8. Small groups tend to be more successful. Limit the group to no more than eight.

9. Have FUN! Plan for FUN! Support groups can become quite intense so it is important to balance intensity with FUN. Plan for it!

GUIDELINES FOR CONVENING A PEER SUPPORT GROUP

1. See that the meeting place provides for as much privacy and intimacy as possible.

2. The agenda will have been set previously by the group. Have a few questions prepared just to get the discussion started. Let the group guide the discussion but keep them on track.

3. Don’t expect every person to respond to every comment or question. Try to draw out the quiet ones and try to control those who dominate.

4. It is OK if there is no solution to a problem. The important thing is for the person to feel she has had opportunity to express herself.

5. Encourage the women to respond to each other. What YOU may have to say about something may not be as important as what THEY have to say.

6. Be prepared! Someone in the group may have a special need. This should have priority over the agenda. At some point you may need to recommend deference to the associational director of missions or recommend professional help. At all cost you must maintain confidentiality.

7. This is not a prayer meeting, but use prayer in practical ways.

8. Be respectful of the time frame of the support group and see that you end on time. This is critical to the future of your group.

Suggested Topics for Discussion

Adjusting to Mobility

Ruth 1:16; 2 Corinthians 11:24-28; 1 Timothy 6:6; Philippians 2:4-8; Proverbs 10:4; Proverbs 20:27

But I Have a Job, Too

Philippians 1:22; James 1:17; 1 Peter 4:10; Luke 12:15; Matthew 6:19-21

The Comfort Zone

Psalm 139:9-10; Philippians 3:13-14; John 15:8

Community Service

Matthew 22:16-21; Titus 3:1-2; Matthew 5:41; 1 Peter 2:13-17

Husband/Wife Commitment and Communication

Colossians 3:18-19; Ephesians 5:22-25; Song of Solomon 4:10, 6:3, 8:6

Interacting with Intolerant or Disagreeable Church Members

Luke 23:34; 1 Peter 1:22

Interaction with Staff Wives

Isaiah 41:13; Mark 9:3; Mark 10:45; 1 Thessalonians 5:16; Philippians 2:3-7; Ephesians

4:32

Living on a Shoestring

Psalm 37:25; Luke 6:38; Job 36:11; Matthew 6:31-33; Hebrews 13:2; Psalm 34:10; Isaiah 44:3; 2 Corinthians 9:8; Psalm 84:11; Philippians 4:6-7

Loneliness and Depression

Philippians 4:6-7; 2 Corinthians 4:8-9; Romans 8:28; Psalm 70:1; 130:1-2; 1 Peter 5:6-7

Making the Most of Myself and My Abilities

Colossians 3:23; Colossians 2:16; Matthew 6:33; 1 Timothy 6:6; 2 Thessalonians 2:15

Ministry Etiquette

1 Corinthians 13:4; Acts 4:32; 1 Thessalonians 5:15

Personal Appearance and Clothes Sense

Psalm 104:1; Galatians 3:27; 1 Corinthians 6:19-20; 2 Corinthians 5:1-3

Personal Spiritual Growth

James 5:16; Colossians 4:2; Ephesians 5:20; Matthew 6:7-8; 2 Peter 3:18; 2 Timothy

2:15

Privacy -- Confidante Social Life Outside of Church

Colossians 2:8, 16; 4:5; Proverbs 3:29; 25:9

Recycling the Superwoman Syndrome

Matthew 11:28-30; Galatians 6:4-5; Ephesians 2:9; Hebrews 10:25; 1 Corinthians 5:17; Matthew 9:38

Rediscovering the Family

Matthew 5:13-16; 1 Timothy 3:4-5; 1 Corinthians 13:4-7; Proverbs 22:6; Ephesians 4:31-32

Relationships and Forgiveness

Psalm 55:22; Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:12-13; Isaiah 50:10; 1 Peter 5:6; Proverbs 15:1; Proverbs 19:11

Resource Management

Malachi 3:10; 2 Corinthians 9:15; Matthew 25:14-30; 28:15; Romans 12:6; Colossians

1:10; Ecclesiastes 7:11; Luke 14:28; 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12

Sensitivity Gifts

John 15:16; Philippians 1:6; Psalm 32:8; 1 Corinthians 12:4-6; Proverbs 16:9

Time Management (For Home and Myself)

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8; 1 John 3:22; 1 Peter 5:5

Unrealistic Expectations and God’s Will

Colossians 2:8; Colossians 2:16; Philippians 4:7-8; 2 Chronicles 14:18; Romans 15:7

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Today, be a source of encouragement.

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