SAMPLE GOOD WRITING FILE FOR GATSBY
SAMPLE GOOD WRITING FILE FOR GATSBY
“We walked through a high hallway into a bright rosy-colored space, fragilely bound into the house by French windows at either end. The windows were ajar and gleaming white against the fresh grass outside that seemed to grow a little way into the house. A breeze blew through the room, blew curtains in at one end and out the other like pale flags, twisting them up toward the frosted wedding cake of the ceiling—and then rippled over the wine-colored rug, making a shadow on it as wind does on the sea.
The only completed stationary object in the room was an enormous couch on which two young women were buoyed up as though upon an anchored balloon. They were both in white and their dresses were rippling and fluttering as if they had just been blown back in after a short flight around the house. I must have stood for a few moments listening to the whip and snap of the curtains and the groan of a picture on the wall. Then there was a boom as Tom Buchanan shut the rear windows and the caught wind died out about the room and the curtains and the rugs and the two young women ballooned slowly to the floor.”
(page 12, The Great Gatsby)
This is an example of effective writing, for it uses color and sound imagery as well as figurative language. Fitzgerald organizes this diction in a series of loose sentences to characterize the wealthier characters of the novel in the setting of their extravagant home in East Egg.
The first paragraph consists of three loose sentences, all of which force the reader to focus on the action in these sentences. We understand that the characters “walk through a high hallway” of the Buchanan home, the “windows were ajar,” and that a “breeze blew through the room.” Fitzgerald uses the rest of the sentence to expand and amplify the details of what the characters experience. For example, in the first sentence, the alliteration in “high hallway” helps to accentuate the spacious dimensions of this “rosy-colored space,” revealing Nick’s awe at the majestic and warm qualities of this elaborate home. This “rosy” warm color is later reinforced through the “wine-colored rug” on the floor that Fitzgerald juxtaposes with the white “frosted wedding cake of the ceiling.” Here one can visualize the grand dimensions of the room from top to bottom, and the connection of celebratory foods evident in the diction evokes a rich sense of indulgence. The reader can also notice how the intricate, decorative ceiling is a centerpiece of the room. The color white is significant, for it also describes the “gleaming” windows. This repetition symbolizes a sense of perfection that the Buchanans try to portray. Finally the last sentence of the paragraph utilizes the dash to call attention to how the “rippl[ing] movement of the curtains help to create a “shadow” on the rug. Fitzgerald makes more use of this “rippling” image when he introduces the two women, Daisy and Jordan, in the next paragraph.
In the second paragraph, these “two young women” are dressed in white, and the “rippling and fluttering” movements of their dresses are meant to mirror how the breeze makes the curtains blow “like pale” or lifeless “flags.” This visual imagery created by the simile helps the reader to understand the thin substance of both material objects, suggesting a metaphoric connection that both are easily swayed, either by the tangible breeze or the intangible whims of the times.
Lastly, the second paragraph focuses on the sense of sound to reveal the power of the wind as it “whip[s]” and “snap[s]” the curtains about, and even personifies the picture on the wall as it begins to “groan” or thump repeatedly. The final sound described is the aggressive “boom” as characterized by Tom Buchanan’s forceful shutting of the rear windows. This action has a profound domino effect—not only does the wind now “die” down, but the “two young women” now “balloon slowly to the floor,” as if they have been deflated and are now void of all life and excitement. Tom’s antagonistic nature is subtly revealed, as are the passive qualities of these women of luxury.
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