OUR RELATIONSHIP NOTEBOOK
OUR RELATIONSHIP NOTEBOOK
DETAILED TABLE OF CONTENTS
See summary table of contents for quick overview. Place in the front of the notebook.
(While on the web, using this page you can link directly to the items in underlined red below.)
PART I. WHAT WE WANT, HAVE, AND CAN DO
PURPOSE, MISSION, VISION, GOALS
Our Purpose, Mission
Our Vision[1]
Our Overall Vision
Our Detailed Vision
The Criteria For A Healthy, Excellent Relationship
Our Goals[2]
COMMITMENTS, OVERALL
Commitments, Overall We Have Made[3]
Overall principles, practices and “rules” we are committed to
How we view relationship in general and ours in particular
SPECIAL SIGNIFICANCES FOR US:
Our song(s)
Other specially significance items, symbols, places
Our memories (a special separate book would of course be a good idea)
ACTIVITIES WE CAN DO TOGETHER
Stuff we can do together
Trips to take
PART II. CREATING MORE OF WHAT WE WANT, LESS OF NOT WANTED
ENHANCING THE RELATIONSHIP
Actions
Relationship Skills To Learn[4]
Resources we can utilize[5]
STATUS CHECKUPS
Our relationship checkups[6]
Each partner checkups
Commitments made – how doing
RECOGNITIONS
My Acknowledgement of my partner's intentions and what I appreciate
about and in my partner
Lists of what we each appreciate about the other[7]
ISSUES, CONCERNS, ITEMS TO WORK ON
Issues
Ongoing
Resolved
Complaints
Concerns
NEEDS, WANTS
Each of our "conditions of satisfaction" for what we want from the other
What makes each of us feel loved
AGREEMENTS[8]
Our agreements and commitments as we go
Overall
Children
Monetary
Lifestyle
Travel
Time together
Health
Duties
Communication
How we will treat each other
Developing our relationship
APPENDIX. THE MECHANICS AND SUPPORTING STRUCTURES
COUPLE’S COUNCIL
Agenda[9]
Rules
FORMS AND TOOLS WE USE
Couples’ Dialogue
Behavioral Change Request Form[10]
Current Upset Resolution Form[11]
Sentence Stems
Our "Check Up" Forms (see Status Checkups, above)
How Are We Doing?
How Am I Doing?
RESOURCES, BOOKS[12]
Books for us to read
Resources
FOR FUTURE MEETINGS
Notes for Discussion (or put up in the front of the notebook)
What to cover in the next (or future) meeting
NOTES (Could just put in a labeled file folder)
Notes from discussion, storage
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[1] , Relationships, Sustaining, Planning/Vision/Goals Relationship Vision - An example
[2] , Relationships, Sustaining, Planning/Vision/Goals Goals For Our Relationship - An example
[3] , Relationships, Sustaining, Planning/Vision/Goals WHAT IS WANTED IN OUR RELATIONSHIP
[4] , Relationships, Sustaining, Learning/Mastering, Learning: Topics To Learn About To Enhance Our Relationship - Choose Which
[5] , Relationship Resources
[6] Go to , Relationships, Sustaining, Tests – such as ***WHERE ARE WE IN OUR RELATIONSHIP? (longer test) or Checkup Test (Quick) - How Is The Relationship Doing?
[7] , Relationships, Sustaining, Topics Overall, Loving, Appreciating Your Partner - A vital exercise where you list … AND What I Appreciate About My Partner - An exercise to give you a perspective…
[8] , Relationships, Sustaining, Agreements/Commitments/Rules, Our List of Agreements - An example for you to accumulate agreements of yours, Relationship Agreements That Should Be Completed - By Category , Spending Agreements - What we agree to, including a set of forms to track what is happening, Written Agreements In Our Relationship (An example - from which you might pick some)
[9] , Relationships, Communication, Methods *WEEKLY COUPLE'S COUNCIL AND Weekly Family "Life" Meeting Agenda - Example .
[10] , Relationships, Communication, Methods Behavior Change Request Form
[11] , Relationships, Communication, Methods Current Upset Resolution Exercise - Worksheet
[12] , Relationship Resources
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