All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be

? 1435 AH / 2014 AC

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without a prior written permission from

Get Ready

Before

Getting Married

- 1 -

Table of Content

Introduction ........................................................................................ 3 Chapter One: During Engagement .................................................... 5

Dos and Don'ts During Engagement .................................................. 6 The Way to a Sucessful Engagement ................................................ 14 Do You Really Want to Get Married?................................................ 21 Chapter Two: Getting Married........................................................ 26 1, 2, 3's of Marital Life....................................................................... 27 Myths and Facts About Muslim Marriage......................................... 33 Marriage for Young Muslims: Making a Place of Love ...................... 42 Discretion In Weddings: Don't `Show and Tell' ................................. 49 Youth Marriage: How Far Parents Shall Be Involved?....................... 58 Happily (N)Ever After ........................................................................ 67 Chapter Three: Challenges Facing Newlyweds ................................ 70 Hiccups of Newlyweds After Great Expectations.............................. 71 First Year of Marriage: Is It Complicated?......................................... 79 Marriage As a Roller Coaster: Special Tips ........................................ 87

Get Ready

Before

Getting Married

- 2 -

Chapter Four: Q & A....................................................................... 95 Love or Arranged Marriage? ............................................................. 96 Marrying Someone I Never Met in Person: Risky?.......................... 102 Between Love and My Parents' Wish.............................................. 107 Rules for Muslim Gentlemen?......................................................... 111 Parents Disagree with Marrying a Disabled Girl ............................ 115

Get Ready

Before

Getting Married

- 3 -

Introduction

We all know that marriage is of primary importance in Islam. Numerous Qur'anic verses and hadiths point to this fact.

"And among His Signs is this that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect." (30:21)

And the famous hadith of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him):

"When a man marries he has fulfilled half of the religion; so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half." (Al-Tirmidhi # 3096)

However, building a life and family with someone (and managing it) is hard work and far from the absolute `bed of roses' that some people unrealistically expect.

Some even doubt whether being happy in marriage is possible; many of our young people are scared to death of getting married based on what they see happening to married peopleall around them.

Being a struggle, however, does not preclude the possibility of happiness, fulfillment, joy, love, and even romance.

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