THE BIG BANG THEORY
THE BIG BANG THEORY
Spec Script
“The Good Will Reaction”
Written by
Joe Webb
1855 East Rose, Apt. 9-D
Orange, California 92867
217-259-9322
jwebb16@slu.edu
“The Good Will Reaction”
TEASER
FADE IN:
INT. LEONARD AND SHELDON’S APARTMENT – EVENING
Leonard, Sheldon, Howard, and Raj are seated in a circle in the living room. Raj holds a small pressurized tank, and is filling a balloon from the nozzle. He brings the balloon just short of his mouth, and Howard rubs his hands excitedly.
RAJ
Ready?
HOWARD
Was Sitting Bull ready for Custer to show up at Little Big Horn? Of course, we’re ready. Do it.
Raj takes a quick balloon hit. The others lean forward.
RAJ
(in an unnaturally DEEP VOICE)
Truth. Sometimes, at night, I wake up and think my Geordi La Forge collectible figure is staring at me. But it’s hard to tell because his eyes are hidden behind the visor.
Raj passes the balloon to Howard, who inhales.
HOWARD
(in an unnaturally DEEP VOICE)
Truth. When I was in junior high, I used to imagine Margaret Thatcher and Stephen Hawking having phone sex. Sometimes…I still do.
Howard passes the balloon to Leonard, who inhales.
LEONARD
(in an unnaturally DEEP VOICE)
Truth. Walowitz, that’s disgusting.
As Leonard passes the balloon to Sheldon, there is a LOUD KNOCK on the door, and Penny, dressed nicely, lets herself in. She notices the air tank, looks at Leonard, and then back at the air tank.
PENNY
I’m fairly certain that I don’t want to know – but… - what the hell are you guys doing?
LEONARD
(back to his normal voice)
Walowitz stole a tank of Sulfur Hexafluoride from the NASA vault at his lab. And now we’re playing “deep-deep-voice truth or dare.”
PENNY
Sulfur Hexa-what?
SHELDON
Sulfur Hexafluoride. It’s a high-density gas used to insulate everything from electromagnets to household windows. By allowing small amounts to enter the larynx, the timbre of vocal exhalations are significantly lowered…
Sheldon takes a quick breath of the SF6.
SHELDON (CONT.)
(in an unnaturally DEEP VOICE)
Like this.
PENNY
So you’re huffing anti-helium?
LEONARD
Basically.
PENNY
Cool. Can I try?
SHELDON
(handing her the balloon)
If you think you can handle it.
Penny inhales and begins grooving her shoulders to an imaginary sultry beat.
PENNY
(in an unnaturally DEEP VOICE)
“Take it off, Deb. Take it all off.”
HOWARD
Well, I don’t know what that was…but I like it.
PENNY
Barry White? The Sultan of Smooth Soul?
Howard and Raj shrug their shoulders and shake their heads.
SHELDON
While I’m sure your impression of Mr. White is more than adequate, I think it should be pointed out that you’re not playing by the rules, Penny. When you play “deep-deep-voice truth or dare,” you’re supposed to say the word “truth” first.
PENNY
What do you do if you want to take a dare?
Raj, Howard, Sheldon, and Leonard look at each other, confused.
LEONARD
I don’t know. No one has ever wanted to do the dare before?
PENNY
Oh sweetie, I’m pretty sure you don’t have all of the rules of truth or dare figured out completely. Then again, that might be a good thing.
Penny holds up the balloon between her two fingers, and then releases the pinched end with finality.
PENNY
Anyway, are we ready to go?
SHELDON
Hah! Was the Polish government ready for the German blitzkrieg in 1939? Were the 12 tribes of
Kobol ready for the Ceylon Attack in Battlestar Galactica?
PENNY
I’ll take that as a ye… - Actually, I’m just gonna take that as a “Sheldon.”
SHELDON
And I’m still not certain why my attendance is required at a mixer with the American Studies department.
LEONARD
I don’t know - Dr. Gablehauser thinks the Physics department needs to be more approachable.
SHELDON
But that’s absurd! I would be perfectly happy if no one new ever approached me again.
LEONARD
You know, they do actually work at the University. It might be kind of interesting.
SHELDON
Well, using that logic, I suppose we should also hold mixers with the janitorial staff?
PENNY
Oh, lighten up, Sheldon. It will be fun!
SHELDON
I detest most things that are supposed to be fun.
The gang moves out the front door, and we…
CUT TO:
MAIN TITLE SEQUENCE
END OF TEASER
ACT ONE
INT. UNIVERSITY RECEPTION ROOM – EVENING
At the inter-departmental mixer, the crowd is divided between physicists, dressed to the geeky nines, and members of the American Studies department, who look like they have all been plucked from the J-Crew catalog.
Raj, Leonard, and Sheldon are standing behind the buffet table, and Penny is mixing with a group to the side, talking to a hunky young professor of 35, Brian, and a beautiful woman in black-rimmed glasses, his sister Leslie, who looks a little like Elizabeth Hurley.
LESLIE
So, I haven’t seen you around before. Are you with the university?
PENNY
No, I’m here with my friends from the Physics Department. Sadly, a department mixer was my best option on a Friday night.
Penny points over to the buffet table at Raj, Leonard, and Sheldon.
LESLIE
These things aren’t so bad. Sometimes Professor Finkleday gets drunk and takes his shirt off… - and oh, the Indian one is pretty cute.
PENNY
Well, I’d tell you to go talk to him, but…he doesn’t really talk.
LESLIE
That’s too bad.
PENNY
So, Brian, what do you do?
BRIAN
Well, right now, I’m writing my second book…
PENNY
Yeah, what’s it about?
BRIAN
You know the movie Good Will Hunting? It’s about the portrayal of genius in American culture. I guess I’ve always felt like I have a little trouble relating to the rest of the world – so I identify with the character.
PENNY
(pointing again towards the table)
Funny, I guess my frame of reference for trouble relating to the world has shifted a little in the last year.
As Penny points, WE FOLLOW her indication over to the table:
LEONARD
I can’t believe it. These people all look like the ones who kicked our asses in high school. How did they get so much education? They’re like mutant Greek gods and goddesses.
Howard approaches from the side.
HOWARD
And speaking of goddesses, check that out.
Howard nods his head over towards the triumvirate of Penny, Leslie, and Brian.
LEONARD
Exactly, why is she talking to that guy?
HOWARD
No, I meant check out that Helen of Troy look-alike in the glasses. I think I’m gonna go bust a little physics move on her.
SHELDON
Helen of Troy was a mortal.
Howard leaves the group behind the table and heads towards Leslie. Leonard follows Howard, Sheldon follows Leonard, and Raj remains standing behind the table. Howard taps her on the shoulder.
HOWARD
Excuse me, mademoiselle, but I was wondering if you’d heard the latest university news about the engineer who remotely re-aligned the Mars rover?
LESLIE
I’m sorry – umm, I’m not real up on my science – too much American studies.
HOWARD
Well, in that case, I’m an American – how would you like to study me?
LESLIE
Oh God – that’s disgusting – but kind of funny. Do lines like that work on girls in the Physics Department?
HOWARD
No. Not really.
Brian, over-protective, and mistaking the exchange for an altercation, comes up to accost Howard.
BRIAN
Hey, are you bothering my sister?
LEONARD
(coming to Howard’s defense)
No one is bothering anyone. We’re just mixing…at the mixer.
BRIAN
I didn’t ask for your opinion, Frodo.
LEONARD
Is that supposed to be some kind of insult?
BRIAN
Yeah, and it looks to me like your little hobbit friend here was trying to hit on my sister. Maybe I should send him back to central earth.
LEONARD
First of all, it’s middle earth. And second, how is that any different from what you were just doing with Penny?
Brian takes a step forward to get into Leonard’s face.
BRIAN
Because it’s not creepy when you’re not a nerd, nerd.
SHELDON
Can I just point out that your statement is a logical fallacy, riddled with horrible internal inconsistencies, and an awkward double negative.
LEONARD
Yeah!
Brian gives Leonard a shove.
BRIAN
So that’s your thing, huh? Your crew runs around telling professors their arguments are riddled with inconsistencies?
LESLIE
Take it easy, Brian. You’re not Matt Damon – and these guys aren’t that Michael Bolton look-alike in the movie.
BRIAN
(pointing at Leonard)
That doesn’t mean that this nerd and I can’t step outside and settle this like men.
LEONARD
Hey, we’re all academics here! – there’s no need to assert our physical dominance.
Brian picks up Leonard, who protests, and begins carrying him into the hallway. As he does, we here shouts from…
PENNY and LESLIE
Hey!!!
Walowitz JUMPS on Brian’s back, but Brian easily SHAKES him off as he continues to carry Leonard towards the hallway. Brian makes a MENACING GLARE at Sheldon, and Sheldon, relying heavily on the flight tendency of his fight or flight mechanism, sprints off like lightning in the other direction.
RAJ
(watching Sheldon run from the buffet)
Holy cow! Sheldon is actually incredibly fast.
CUT TO:
INT. DEPT. HALLWAY LEADING TO BATHROOM – CONTINUOUS
While Brian carries Leonard towards a door, Leonard struggles ineffectually in his grasp.
LEONARD
Hey! Hey! Where are we going?!? Put me down!!
Brian pushes the door open by backing into it, continuing to hold the struggling Leonard. WE FOLLOW into the bathroom.
BRIAN
What? This has never happened to you before?
LEONARD
(being spun upside down)
Oh no – not the swirly!
As he protests, Brian continues spinning Leonard, places his head in the toilet, and kicks the flushing lever.
CUT TO:
INT. LEONARD AND SHELDON’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Leonard is seated on the couch, holding his head in his hands, while Penny comforts him. Sheldon, Raj, and Howard are seated in other chairs.
PENNY
Are you sure you’re all right, sweetie?
LEONARD
Yes, I’m fine. Just embarrassed, that’s all.
PENNY
Because that guy Brian turned out to be such a jerk – the way he was all, oh, I’m the next Good Will Hunting…
SHELDON
(using air quotes for “advanced”)
Please, that movie was a joke. Evidently, what they consider to be an “advanced” Fourier system at M.I.T. is about as difficult to follow as an episode of Blue’s Clues.
PENNY
You know, he must have banged your head pretty hard into that toilet to give you such a big bump. I’m going to go across the hall to get some ice.
Penny crosses the apartment and heads towards the door.
LEONARD
(as she is leaving)
Thanks, Penny.
After she closes the door behind her, Leonard continues:
LEONARD (CONT.)
I can’t believe this! I thought I got my last swirly when the freshmen basketball team ganged up on me the day before high school graduation.
RAJ
You got a swirly from freshmen when you were a senior?
LEONARD
Yes, but those girls were ridiculously strong.
HOWARD
I’d let a group of ladies hold me down under water any time.
LEONARD
(smiling)
Actually…that one wasn’t all that bad. And by the way, Howard – thanks for at least trying to help me out.
RAJ
(laughing)
But Brian brushed him off like a bowler angry at Vijay Patel for taking him to task with a full century in the previous inning.
LEONARD
Is that a cricket reference? And what were you doing just standing there behind the buffet?
RAJ
The shrimp tempura was excellent. Plus, my religion forbids me from fighting.
LEONARD
What are you talking about? When Sheldon’s sister was here, you tried to strangle Walowitz!
RAJ
But that was over a girl. Also, Howard is much, much littler than that guy, which is why he was able to brush him off like a bowler angry at Vijay Patel…
LEONARD
(cutting him off)
All right, fine! Fine. I get it. No more Vijay Patel references.
Leonard turns his attention to Sheldon.
LEONARD (CONT.)
And why did you run off?
Sheldon laughs once in his hiccup-style cackle.
SHELDON
I’m sorry. Is that a rhetorical question?
LEONARD
No. Friends are supposed to have each other’s back.
RAJ
You should have seen him – he was incredibly fast. Why didn’t you run track in high school, Sheldon?
SHELDON
Well, presupposing that I thought such a pursuit were even a worthwhile expenditure of time, it would have been rather difficult since I was only in high school for one semester. And I was eleven.
The door opens, and Penny returns with an ice-pack.
PENNY
Here you go, sweetie.
Leonard takes the ice pack and holds it to the top of his head.
LEONARD
What are we going to do about this guys? We’re way too old to still be getting swirlies.
HOWARD
Well, we could always take a page from Wolverine, and have an adamantium alloy of retractable claws grafted to our bodies.
LEONARD
Come on, I’m being serious here!
PENNY
Well, you could start working out.
Everyone stops to stare at Penny.
PENNY (CONT.)
You know – with weights? At a gym?
Sheldon does his hiccup laugh again. Raj covers his mouth to keep from laughing in front of Penny.
PENNY (CONT.)
Hey, I’m not joking! Is there some sort of unwritten law that says physicists can’t exercise?
HOWARD
Not at all. In fact, I take my cardio-funk tape pretty seriously every morning. And I go to the gym at least once a week to work out my inner and outer thighs… - for better thrusting power.
Leonard stands up and looks at himself in the hallway mirror. He raises and broadens his chest, then pulls in his stomach – noticing the result.
LEONARD
You know what? Maybe you’re right. Starting Monday morning, Howard, you and I are going to work out.
SHELDON
Before work? But you’re my ride!
LEONARD
Well, then I guess you’ll just have to come, too.
Sheldon looks at his bicep, flexes it, and then wrinkles up his face in disgust.
CUT TO:
INT. HOWARD’S BASEMENT – MORNING
In front of the television in Howard’s basement, a weight bench has been set up. Leonard is staring at the bar which has been equipped with a ten pound weight on each side.
SHELDON
So what’s your plan, Leonard? Are you going to build your upper-body strength to the point where you can beat this baboon in a fight?
LEONARD
Well…maybe. Actually, yes.
Leonard sits down on the bench.
LEONARD (CONT.)
So what’s the deal with this, Howard?
HOWARD
This, my friend, is the bench press. You just lie down on the bench, and push the weight bar up from your chest.
LEONARD
And how much weight do you think a guy like Brian can bench press?
HOWARD
I don’t know – maybe 275 pounds?
LEONARD
And how much is this?
HOWARD
I thought we’d start with 65.
Leonard stretches out on the bench, carefully places his hands on the bar, and with Howard’s help, raises it over his chest. As soon as Howard let’s go, however, the bar falls flat, crushing Leonard.
LEONARD
Help! Help!
Sheldon rushes over, and with Howard on one side and Sheldon on the other, they lift the bar back into place.
HOWARD
Maybe we should warm up with the tape first.
LEONARD
Good idea.
Sheldon walks over to the television, and grabs a VHS tape to slide it into the VCR.
HOWARD
Wait! Not that tape.
Sheldon drops the tape to the floor and runs over to the sink to wash his hands.
END OF ACT ONE
ACT TWO
INT. DR. GABLEHAUSER’S OFFICE – MORNING
Sheldon and Leonard are standing outside of Dr. Eric Gablehauser’s office. They knock on the door and enter.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Have a seat, gentlemen.
Leonard and Sheldon sit down in the two chairs indicated by the Physics Department Chair.
DR. GABLEHAUSER (CONT.)
Dr. Koothrapali informs me that there was something of an incident at the mixer on Friday.
SHELDON
If by incident you mean the part where a hulking-beast of an American Studies professor flushed Leonard’s head in a toilet, then you’d be right.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
That would be the one. And I probably don’t need to tell you that this looks extremely bad for the department.
LEONARD
I’m sorry, Dr. Gablehauser. It wasn’t my intention to get into a fight.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
I’m not mad because you got into the fight, Dr. Hofstadter. I’m mad because you lost.
LEONARD
Excuse me?
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Gentlemen, perhaps it hasn’t occurred to you exactly why we held this mixer last weekend, so I’ll give you a little clarification.
SHELDON
Yes, please do. I’d love to hear this.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Well, as you may or may not be aware, our reputation isn’t exactly the most sterling these days…
SHELDON
Excuse me, sir, but this is the pre-eminent physics department in the country! We’ve won two Nobel prizes in the last decade, and given my track record to this point, one can only assume that I’ll add a third shortly.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
I’m not talking about our reputation for science, Dr. Cooper.
SHELDON
Well, to what else could you possibly be referring?
DR. GABLEHAUSER
I’m referring to the fact that I’m tired of hearing jokes from other department chairs about my faculty. And the last thing I need is to have Darius Holder tell me at racquetball on Thursday that his professors are giving my professors swirlies.
SHELDON
Well, what do you suggest we do about it?
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Get even.
LEONARD
We tried working out this morning.
SHELDON
But apparently working out mostly involves watching Walowitz lip-synch to a song called “My Prerogative” by Bobby Brown. And I failed to see how that was going to get us anywhere.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Need I remind you, gentlemen, that you are scientists?
SHELDON
Hardly.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Well then I’m ordering you, as your department chair, to use your big brains to figure something out.
LEONARD
(standing up)
Is that all?
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Almost.
Gablehauser takes a red and gold running singlet that has been emblazoned with the slogan PHYSICS from his desk and hands it to Sheldon.
DR. GABLEHAUSER (CONT.)
I also understand, Dr. Cooper, that you are quite the runner.
SHELDON
What’s this?
DR. GABLEHAUSER
It’s a uniform for our Physics Department University Olympics squad. Every year, we get beaten miserably in the hundred yard dash by Brian Murphy, the professor who…
LEONARD
Dunked my head into a toilet.
DR. GABLEHAUSER
Exactly. So you’ll be running for us on Saturday.
SHELDON
But Dr. Gablehauser! This isn’t fair!
DR. GABLEHAUSER
It’s not a request.
There is a pause as Sheldon looks at the singlet. Dr. Gablehauser turns his attention to some paperwork on his desk. He looks up to notice that Leonard and Sheldon are still in the room.
DR. GABLEHAUSER (CONT.)
That’s all.
CUT TO:
INT. APARTMENT MAILBOXES – EVENING
Leonard is standing at the mailboxes, holding a large bag of food, and pulling out his mail when Penny walks into the apartment building. She also begins grabbing her mail.
LEONARD
Hey, Penny.
PENNY
Oh, hey, Leonard! How’d it go this morning with the big first workout?
She reaches over and playfully squeezes his bicep as they begin WALKING UP THE STAIRS.
PENNY (CONT.)
Did you get all buffed up?
LEONARD
Oh yes, I got all…buffed up.
Leonard does a bicep curl with the bag of food.
LEONARD (CONT.)
This bag of Indian food already feels significantly lighter.
CUT TO:
INT. LEONARD AND SHELDON’S APARTMENT – CONTINUOUS
Leonard and Penny enter the apartment, expecting to find Walowitz, Raj, and Sheldon. Instead, they see a giant sewing machine set up in the middle of the living room – but no sign of the guys.
LEONARD
Sheldon? Howard? Raj? Are you guys here?
HOWARD (O.S.)
We’re in the bathroom!
PENNY
All three of you? I thought that was more of a girl thing.
Leonard and Penny cross the living room and head into the bathroom, where they see Sheldon, holding some sort of electronic device, and orchestrating an exercise.
LEONARD
What are you guys doing in here?
SHELDON
Fulfilling what is evidently one of the non-negotiable clauses in the pact of friendship.
Walowitz, Raj, and Sheldon all take a pair of tiny earplugs and insert them into their ears before Sheldon hits a button on the device, and a horrible, high-pitched wailing begins. Leonard and Penny COVER THEIR EARS. Sheldon hits the button again, stopping the noise.
PENNY
What the hell was that?!?
HOWARD
150 decibels of a 10,000 mega-Hertz sound wave.
PENNY
But why?
SHELDON
Did you notice that when I hit the button, both your and Leonard’s initial reaction was to immediately raise your arms, covering your ears, rendering you defenseless?
PENNY
So?
SHELDON
Well, after the unmitigated disaster that was Leonard’s attempt at the bench press this morning, I took Dr. Gablehauser’s suggestion under consideration. And I came up with this.
Sheldon holds out the transmitter for them to see.
LEONARD
Which is?
SHELDON
The canis barba pro humanus.
PENNY
The what?
SHELDON
It’s a dog-whistle for humans. When Leonard, wearing these tiny concealed earplugs, lures Brian into the bathroom again, I hit the button on the transmitter, and the three of us – or perhaps four, given our body mass disadvantage – secure him with these heavy duty bungee-cables. Then, Leonard gives him a swirly.
LEONARD
Do you really think this will work?
SHELDON
Leonard, I have a master’s degree and two Ph.D.’s. I’ve been named junior physicist of the year by the Nils Bohr foundation for the last three consecutive years. It will work.
HOWARD
My vote was for using a horse-tranquilizer – but it turns out they won’t sell phencyclidine to just anybody.
LEONARD
And how do we get Brian into the bathroom?
SHELDON
(pointing at Penny)
Ah, that’s where she comes in.
CUT TO:
INT. LEONARD SHELDON’S LIVING ROOM – MOMENTS LATER
The gang is seated on the couches and chairs, eating their Indian food, with the giant sewing machine in the middle.
LEONARD
So Penny calls up Brian and asks if he will take her on a tour of the American Studies department?
SHELDON
Correct.
LEONARD
And while they’re walking through the hallway – I emerge and pick a fight with him?
SHELDON
Correct.
LEONARD
But how do we know he’ll go for the swirly again?
SHELDON
Leonard, he’s about as evolved as a homo habilus discovering his opposable thumbs. It’s instinct.
LEONARD
And then, once he brings me into the bathroom, you hit the button, and we pounce?
HOWARD
Boo-yah!
LEONARD
Well, okay, then.
Leonard takes a bite of his food, and it occurs to him that he has not yet asked about the sewing machine.
LEONARD (CONT.)
By the way, what’s with the sewing machine?
SHELDON
Oh, I also designed this.
Sheldon walks over to the sewing machine, and straps on a carbon-nano tube vest made out of material that appears also to be the basis for Bruce Wayne’s bat-cape. It looks a little like he’s wearing a super-lightweight kayak.
SHELDON (CONT.)
It’s a carbon nano-tube skeleton, which, according to the laws of aerodynamics, will substantially reduce friction from drag. It’s for the race on Saturday.
LEONARD
Cool.
CUT TO:
INT. UNIVERSITY BATHROOM – AFTERNOON
Sheldon, Raj, and Howard are hiding behind the swinging hinge side of the bathroom door. An owl-eyed man with a bow-tie emerges from one of the bathroom stalls, and eyes them warily.
HOWARD
Dr. Finkleday.
DR. FINKLEDAY
Gentlemen.
Dr. Finkleday looks at them curiously for a moment more, then exits the bathroom.
SHELDON
We should have tracked the urination patterns for all of the university’s faculty to make sure the timing was right.
They each deliberately place their ear-plugs in their ears.
CUT TO:
INT. UNIVERSITY HALLWAY – CONTINUOUS
Penny is walking down the hallway with Brian Murphy, being mildly flirtatious – and devious!
BRIAN
I’m so glad you called. I was hoping I’d get to see you again.
PENNY
Well, I watched your movie last night, and it made me think of you.
BRIAN
Good Will Hunting?
PENNY
(nodding agreement)
I really like the scene wear they see the jerk guy at the diner, and Will asks him if he likes apples.
BRIAN
It’s always nice when the smart guy gets the girl’s number.
As Brian is delivering this line, Leonard emerges from a classroom doorway, and obstructs Brian’s progress down the hallway – standing right in front of the bathroom.
LEONARD
But who says you’re the smart guy in this situation?
BRIAN
What are you doing here, Frodo?
LEONARD
Well, I’ve been thinking about the other night.
BRIAN
What about it?
LEONARD
First of all, my name’s not Frodo – although that would be cool. And second, I’m going to even the score.
BRIAN
Oh yeah, how’s that?
Leonard fishes into his shirt pocket and pulls out two small earplugs. He holds them up to show Brian, who looks at them confusedly, and then places them in his ears.
LEONARD
Newton’s Law. For every action – there is an equal and opposite reaction.
Brian shrugs his shoulders in confusion.
LEONARD (CONT.)
I’m going to give you a swirly.
Leonard reaches out to try to grab Brian but is instead grabbed himself. Brian looks over at the door to the bathroom, then at Penny.
BRIAN
Excuse me just one second – it seems I didn’t make my point clearly enough last time.
PENNY
(smiling deviously)
Go ahead.
Penny watches Brian carry Leonard in through the bathroom door. She looks down the hallway in both directions, slips in her own set of earplugs and then quickly FOLLOWS.
CUT TO:
INT. UNIVERSITY BATHROOM – CONTINUOUS
When the door swings open with Brian carrying Leonard, we hear shouts of:
HOWARD
Now! Now!
Sheldon hits the button on the transmitter. Brian quickly drops Leonard to cover his ears.
BRIAN
What the hell?!?
Brian attempts to uncover his ears and lunge for the four conspirators, but must immediately recover his ears.
SHELDON
The bungee cords!
HOWARD
(pointing to his ears)
I can’t hear you!
SHELDON
(pointing at the cords)
The bungee cords, Howard!
HOWARD
Oh, right.
Howard and Raj try to wrestle Brian’s arms down to strap him with the heavy-duty cords, but are unable to get them to budge. Leonard and Sheldon jump in, and with two on each arm, they finally manage to secure Brian.
BRIAN
(stricken paralyzed by the noise)
Oh God!
The four men then struggle, but eventually are able to lift Brian and stick his head into the toilet. Leonard kicks the flushing lever, and then they set Brian down on the floor, still tied up.
The guys sprint to the door, and just as they are about to leave, Sheldon hits the button turning the sound off. Brian is left with his arms tied up and his hair soaked. Howard then, right before closing the door, gets in one last parting shot. He reaches around to a holster on his back, pulls out a tank of Sulfur Hexafluoride, quickly fills a balloon, and takes a quick huff.
HOWARD
(in an unnaturally DEEP VOICE)
How do you like them apples?!?
END OF ACT TWO
ACT THREE / CLOSER
EXT. UNIVERSITY TRACK STANDS – AFTERNOON
Howard, Raj, Leonard, and Penny are seated in the stands, awaiting the start of the University Olympics. Leslie, walking up the steps, spots them and approaches.
LESLIE
Hey guys.
PENNY
Oh hey, Leslie.
Leslie looks at Leonard.
LESLIE
So you got even, huh?
LEONARD
You could say that.
LESLIE
Well, it makes me happy. My brother can be kind of an asshole.
She nods at Walowitz, then walks over and sits down by Raj – who squirms a little uncomfortably.
LESLIE
So this is pretty exciting, right?
Raj NODS assent.
LESLIE
And you’re a physicist?
Raj NODS assent.
LESLIE
Cool. I’m gonna go grab a beer. You want one?
Raj NODS assent.
CUT TO:
EXT. UNIVERSITY TRACK – CONTINUOUS
Sheldon is stretching in the infield grass, wearing his PHYSICS singlet, with his reverse carbon nano-tube bat-cape sitting beside him. Brian approaches him.
BRIAN
So, I just wanted to say no hard feelings, huh? My sister convinced me that maybe I had it coming.
Sheldon, a laser beam of focus, NODS assent.
BRIAN
And so, instead of trying to beat all four of you nerds up, I’m just going to destroy you in this race today.
Sheldon gives him a quizzical look and then, as Brian walks away, he straps on his vest.
LOUDSPEAKER
Runners to your marks!
CUT TO:
EXT. UNIVERSITY TRACK STANDS – CONTINUOUS
Leslie returns with two beers, and hands one to Raj. Raj takes a drink, then looks at Leslie.
RAJ
Thank you.
LESLIE
Oh, so you do talk a little. I’m Leslie.
Raj reaches out to shake her hand, smiling.
RAJ
Rajesh.
CUT TO:
EXT. UNIVERSITY TRACK – CONTINUOUS
Sheldon and Brian are crouched down in lanes 5 and 6 on the track. The gun goes off, and both emerge out of their crouch into a sprint.
The race is close for about fifteen meters, until Sheldon hits a button on his side, inflating his aerodynamic kayak vest, and sprints out into a crazy lead.
FADE OUT
END OF SHOW
................
................
In order to avoid copyright disputes, this page is only a partial summary.
To fulfill the demand for quickly locating and searching documents.
It is intelligent file search solution for home and business.
Related searches
- the big bang theory timeline
- big bang theory science timeline
- the big bang theory information shares
- big bang theory show timeline
- the big bang theory show
- big bang theory timeline worksheet
- the big bang theory wikipedia
- the big bang theory science
- big bang theory worksheets pdf
- the big bang theory science for kids
- development of the big bang theory science
- big bang theory science article