Heart of Kent Hospice
Information guide What to do when your loved one dies during the coronavirus outbreakIf you have been given this information, you have experienced the death of someone close to you. We are very sorry for your loss and understand that this is an extremely difficult and distressing time for you and your family. We hope this information helps you to understand what happens next, what decisions you may need to take, and what processes and restrictions are in force during this national crisis. We hope it answers any questions you have but if not, we have also included a list of other support available.Practical information, support arrangements and bereavement supportVisiting your loved one after they have died We appreciate that it’s going to be distressing but sadly, if your loved one died from coronavirus, you will not be able to visit them in the Hospice after their death. Mourners cannot take part in rituals or practices that bring them into close contact with their loved one’s body. If your loved one did not die from coronavirus, you will be able to visit but will still need to follow the strict policies in place to prevent the spread of coronavirus. Contact is restricted to one family member or next of kin who will need to wear personal protective equipment (PPE) and be trained in is use first.Collecting personal items We realise you may wish to receive mementoes or keepsakes of your loved one, for example locks of hair, handprints, or their jewellery. This will be discussed with you and will be taken when your loved one is receiving care shortly after they have died. The mementoes will be placed in a sealed bag and you must not open these until seven days have passed. If your loved one died from coronavirus it will not possible for such keepsake items to be taken at a later date by the funeral director. Receipt of the death certificate When someone dies, a trained healthcare professional will verify the death, to confirm the person has died. This is known as formal verification of death. A doctor will also certify the death by completing a medical certificate of cause of death. This will be signed, scanned and emailed to the registrar. If the person died in hospital, it can take up to three days for this to be completed. You do not need to collect the death certificate. Registering a death All deaths need to be registered with the registrar for births, deaths and marriages. This must be done within five days in England. This includes weekends and bank holidays. It may differ if the registrar agrees to extend the period, or if the death has been referred to the coroner. If a death has been referred to the coroner, you will need to wait for them to give permission before you can register the death. You do not need to go to the registrar’s office in person. You can phone to register a death. There is no cost for registering a death. Registry office information .uk/births-ceremonies-and-deaths/deaths/register-a-deathFuneral arrangements (this information is being updated as Government guidance changes)To help reduce the risk of spreading the infection, funeral directors and faith leaders have been advised to restrict the number of mourners who attend funerals. A safe distance of at least two metres must be maintained between individuals. Sadly, it should be emphasised, that only members of the dead person’s household or close family members may attend funerals. Friends are permitted if these family members are unable to attend. Anyone displaying symptoms of coronavirus must not attend. Those who do attend will need to adhere to social distancing at all times, including when travelling to and from the funeral. There are other ways to attend a funeral, such as using a video link or video call, so it can be streamed live. Please discuss with the funeral directors who will be able to help you. Funerals can be arranged over the phone and by email. Religious funerals at a place of worship have been stopped in line with the Government guidance, but a memorial service can be arranged for a future date. It is a difficult time for everyone, and many people may find themselves in unexpected financial difficulties. The funeral directors will have a range of different services to suit most budgets and they will give advice about financial assistance or whether you are eligible for financial support from the Government. You can also contact the Welfare Advisor at the Hospice for advice. You can ask the undertaker to return ashes to you or they can arrange for you to collect them from the crematorium. If collecting from the crematorium this can only happen after all restrictions are lifted across the UK. How can your loved ones be remembered?With the current restrictions on numbers at funerals and places of worship closed, it is incredibly hard to mark the death of a loved one without all of their family and friends. To observe social distancing at a funeral and celebrate their life and grieve their death separately can be distressing and lonely without the physical comfort of being together.In these instances, setting up a Forever Loved Tribute Fund, to raise money in memory of your loved one can be a wonderful way to honour their memory. It can be a place where friends and families share cherished memories, leave messages, add treasured photos, videos and music which can all help you to feel more connected in your grief. More information can be found at hokh/Some people also find comfort in joining with others in a similar position to remember their loved ones at our remembrance events. Under normal circumstances these would run twice a year, our Sunflower Appeal in the summer and our Light up a Life Appeal in the winter. On Saturday 13 June at 11am we will be holding a virtual Sunflowers service which we hope will provide a moment of calm and allow you to pause and remember your loved. To find out more please contact Claire Ashby, Supporter Care Manager at claire.ashby@hokh.co.uk Practical and financial concerns If your loved one who died was your partner, parent or carer, their death may mean you are left with financial, benefit or practical worries. The Welfare Advisor at Heart of Kent Hospice can support you with these (although we cannot deal with debt, mortgage and housing issues we can signpost you to the right people). Please ring 01622 792200 ext 260.Support for you and your family Grief is a normal process that helps us to cope with our loss. It can bring about many emotions which can vary greatly within a day. You may feel alone and quite overwhelmed at times and then supported and that you’re coping at others. The current social isolation rules may make your feel more alone in your grief and that is why it is important that you stay in contact with others. Talking with family and friends, and seeking bereavement support can be one of the most helpful ways to cope after someone close to you dies. Not everyone will feel they need support outside of their family, but if you do, Heart of Kent Hospice offers bereavement support to the loved ones of patients that have been in our care, and they can also signpost you to support services in the community. Phone the Family Support Team on 01622 792200 ext 260 (please leave a message if we don’t answer immediately and we’ll get back to you as soon as we can) email fstlivingwell@hokh.co.ukIf there are children and teenagers in the household, try to use clear language to tell them what has happened and include them in planning how you are going to mark the death of your loved one. Help them to tell you how they are feeling and give them lots of reassurance. You can phone our Family Support Team on the above number for more advice. During this time it is important that you try to look after your own emotional, spiritual and physical health. Make sure you get rest, eat healthily, exercise and allow yourself both time to grieve and time when you are distracted from your grief. It is important for your wellbeing to keep in touch with others. The following links may also be helpful: National Association of Funeral Directors - .uk/funeral-adviceGood Funeral Guide - Advice Bureau - for support with finance, benefits, housing and debt issues 03444 111444 (Mon – Fri 9:00am – 5:00pm)National bereavement organisations for supportCruse Bereavement Care - Freephone 0808 808 1677 or online .uk/get-help/coronavirus-dealing-bereavement-and-griefMarie Curie - support .uk/help/support/coronavirusMIND - Maidstone & Mid-Kent temporary phone number 07534 044513 mindhelp@.ukMoodcafe - coping with bereavement? On Letting Go - Kent based charity that helps children to cope with the death of someone close to them 03445 611 511? Away - charity offering support to children and young people in West Kent who have been bereaved of a family member or friend. 07970597715? Bereavement Network - .uk/help-around-adeath/covid-19.aspx Winston’s Wish- telling-a-child-someone-died-from-coronavirus ................
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