WEDDING POLICY PACKET - Amazon S3



WEDDING POLICY PACKET

Shady Grove Missionary Baptist Church

111 Hwy 172 Monticello, Arkansas

Office (870) 367-3298

PAGE 1 Table of Contents

PAGE 2 A Note from the Pastor

First of All, Congratulations!

Covenant Marriage Act 2001

PAGE 3 Your Wedding

Scheduling your Wedding

Pre-marital Counseling

Wedding Coordinators

Marriage License

PAGE 4 Planning Your Wedding

Scheduling Your Rehearsal

PAGE 5 Facilities

Decorations

Dressing Areas

Personal Property & Liability

PAGE 6 Media

Sound System & Video Projection System

Photography & Video Recording

PAGE 7 Wedding & Rehearsal Fees

Rehearsal Dinner

Reception

Reception and/or Rehearsal Dinner Fees

PAGE 8 Guidelines for Family Life Center & Kitchen Use

PAGE 9 Wedding Data Sheet

To be completed and returned to Pastor's Secretary within two weeks of marriage approval by the Pastor in order to secure wedding date on calendar.

PAGE 10 Wedding Music Approval Sheet

To be completed and returned to the Shady Grove Wedding Coordinator for approval by the Minister of Music

PAGE 11 Wedding Party Participants

PAGE 12 Give to Photographer

PAGE 13 Give to Florist

PAGE 14 Give to Caterer & Helpers

A NOTE FROM THE PASTOR

First of all, Congratulations!

God wants you to have everything and experience all He designed marriage to be. The Bible says the very first thing God did after he made the man and the woman was to bless them (Gen 1:28). The purpose of this wedding policy and our counseling sessions is to help your marriage relationship become what God intended, a ‘blessed’ relationship. God designed marriage and only God can bless a marriage, so it is important to learn how to follow Him. Following Christ as a married couple is one of the greatest of all life’s journeys.

Below you will see a summary of the Arkansas Covenant Marriage Act. The purpose of the Act is to slow down the divorce process so that a couple can receive counseling. A great majority of marriages are saved and needless pain and expense are avoided when the couple seeks wise counsel and allows for a cooling down period. A great majority of marriages are saved simply because they commit to work through the problem instead of divorcing. Anything that can be done to get help to a couple to prevent a divorce is advisable. It is also the command of God:

1 Corinthians 7:10-11

10 But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband 11 (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife.

12 But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away.

15 Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.

Matthew 19:9

(Jesus said) "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery."

Covenant Marriage Act 2001

Act 1486 of 2001 created an option for couples in Arkansas to choose a Covenant Marriage. The couple entering into a Covenant Marriage agrees to be bound by two limitations on obtaining divorce or separation which do not apply to other couples married in Arkansas:

1) The couple agrees to see marital counseling if problems develop during the marriage; and

2) The couple can seek a divorce or legal separation only for limited reasons, as set out in the Act; adultery, felony conviction resulting in prison, physical or sexual abuse, habitual drunkenness or cruel and barbarous treatment.

Additionally, couples bound by a Covenant Marriage, unless judicially separated, may only sue each other for certain causes of action.

Couples who are already married may execute a declaration of intent to designate their marriage a Covenant Marriage. They must sign a recitation and an affidavit after receiving counseling, to which the counselor must attest. This intent to designate their marriage a Covenant Marriage

YOUR WEDDING

We are excited to hear that you are taking such an important step in your life. We believe marriage is instituted by God, regulated by His commandments, blessed by the Lord Jesus Christ, and to be held in honor among all men. A wedding is a very special occasion as it is establishes a Christian home.

Scheduling Your Wedding

We encourage you to schedule your wedding as soon as you know you plan to be married to allow time for pre-marital counseling. You should call the church secretary to request a tentative wedding date. She will review the church calendar and advise you if that date is available.

Before a wedding date can be set on the church calendar, you and your fiancé must schedule a premarital interview with the Pastor. When the premarital counseling sessions have been scheduled and the Pastor gives his approval dates and times for your rehearsal and wedding will be confirmed.

Pre-Marital Counseling

Because our pastors and leadership are committed to healthy Christ-centered marriages, a prerequisite to being married at Shady Grove Baptist is your participation in pre-marital counseling. At least 4 sessions with the pastor (or number required by another officiating minister) are to be completed two months before the wedding date. Any other pre-marital counseling must be approved by the pastor.

Remarriages are not performed earlier than one year from the date a divorce is final.

Wedding Coordinator

To facilitate your wedding, our Wedding Coordinator will assist you in making this one of the most joyful occasions of your life. Once your wedding date is confirmed, the Wedding Coordinator will set up an appointment with you. She will guide you through your planning and preparation and will be present to direct the rehearsal and to assist you at the wedding. If you choose to have an additional wedding planner, the use of the church’s Wedding Coordinator is still required in order to use the church facilities.

Marriage License

Marriage licenses may be procured from the County Clerk’s office in any county in Arkansas. The church also requires that you also apply for a Covenant Marriage license. The officiating pastor will give you the Covenant Marriage brochure and this will be discussed in your pre-marital counseling.

Bring your marriage license to the Wedding Coordinator at the rehearsal. The officiating pastor will sign and return it to the appropriate County Clerk’s office. Contact the Clerk’s Office two or three weeks after the wedding to obtain a certified copy of the license to use as your permanent record of marriage.

PLANNING YOUR WEDDING

The Wedding Coordinator will guide you through our wedding policies so your wedding will be a worshipful ceremony. The wedding will be most meaningful to you, your families and friends when the sanctity of the church and its services, as well as the dignity and beauty of Christian marriage are observed. Please keep this in mind when planning all aspects of your wedding. Preschool children are often a distraction to the wedding ceremony. We encourage you to not select preschool children less than three years of age for your wedding party. When you complete and sign the Wedding Agreement, return it to the Pastor's Secretary.

Please fill out pages 9, 10, and 11 and give them to the Wedding Coordinator. You may want to keep a copy for yourself.

Pages 12, 13, and 14 are to be given to other people assisting in your wedding.

Scheduling Your Rehearsal

You need to reserve Shady Grove’s facilities for your rehearsal when you schedule your wedding. The Wedding Coordinator will be at your rehearsal to assist you. The officiating pastor will also be at your rehearsal, schedule permitting.

Rehearsals, if well planned, should be completed in one hour.

FACILITIES

The church’s facilities are available for your use. We have found the following to be helpful as you plan:

DATE: Weddings are not performed on Sundays due to the church’s schedule. Since ministry events regularly occur, it is wise to reserve your wedding date as soon as possible.

TIME: Weddings may be held Monday through Saturday between the hours of 10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. as approved by the church staff.

Decorations

• All decorations and decorating equipment must be furnished by the wedding party or florist. Please remember to be respectful of church property and observe the following:

o Decorations and equipment may not be attached to walls, woodwork, furniture, or floors using nails, tacks, staples, or tape as this may deface church property.

o Hymnals and Bibles may not be removed for weddings. Please do not use them as props or flower stands.

• The piano, keyboard, drums and church pews, may not be removed from the stage for your wedding.

• The Pulpit may be removed for your wedding. Only the church’s maintenance staff is approved to move church property. Church chairs may not be moved or removed.

• All rented or borrowed items must be removed immediately following the ceremony.

Only drip less candles are permitted with a drop cloth. Candles should always be lit and extinguished with brass snuffers. This prevents splattering.

Only silk or cloth flower petals are permitted for use by flower girls as they proceed down the aisle.

Birdseed may be used, but only outside the building. Rice is not permitted.

Shady Grove is a smoke-free campus.

Shady Grove is a drug and alcohol-free campus. No alcoholic beverage of any kind may be served or

consumed on any part of its premises.

Guests under the influence of drugs or alcohol will be asked to leave.

Dressing Areas - The following rooms are available:

• The Bridal dressing room and with bathroom area connected to it

• Groomsmen may dress and wait in the classroom across the library.

• Please assign a responsible individual to clear the dressing areas of personal items and clean up any food and trash before leaving the church for your reception.

• Sunday School Classrooms may not be used during the rehearsal or wedding ceremony.

Personal Property & Liability

Shady Grove is not be liable for dresses, silver, jewelry, purses, billfolds, or any personal items lost,

stolen or damaged at any event related to the wedding

MEDIA

All music, whether instrumental, recorded, or vocal, must be appropriate for a worship service. The texts of all songs must adhere to biblical principles and be approved by our Minister of Music at least four weeks prior to the wedding (see Wedding Music Approval Sheet, page 10). A copy of the wedding slideshow should be given the Minister of Music at least two weeks prior to the wedding. The Wedding Coordinator will make an appointment for you with the Minister of Music to review the music.

Original copies of music are to be used for vocalists and instrumentalists. Photo copies made without permission of the copyright holder are illegal.

The job description for our Minister of Music and Pianist does not include weddings. You need to make arrangements with our music staff if you desire their services. The Wedding Coordinator can help you request their services and provide you with their fee schedules. Their fees are paid directly to them. Please do so at the rehearsal.

Use an outside organist or pianist is permitted if approved in advance by the Minister of Music.

Sound System & Video Projection System

Our trained technicians are the only people approved to operate our equipment in the Worship Center and the Family Life Center. The Wedding Fee Schedules contain information on the costs of these services.

Photography & Video Recording

Photographs and video taping of your wedding are permitted within the following guidelines:

• No flash photography during the wedding ceremony. This policy applies to all family and friends of the wedding party.

• Flash pictures by the photographer are permissible during the ceremony.

Video recording of your ceremony is permitted by the camera personnel in fixed, unobtrusive locations.

The officiating pastor must be consulted regarding any exceptions to these policies.

WEDDING & REHEARSAL FEES

Wedding fees retain the services of the personnel necessary to perform cleaning and setup for your wedding. There are no fees for use of the building, air conditioning, heating, or utilities. Fees are paid to qualified personnel who are here after normal working hours since cleaning must be done in a timely manner to be ready for the next day’s activities. The Wedding Coordinator will contact the cleaning services. Wedding fees are due to the Wedding Coordinator the week of the prior to the wedding. A $50 deposit is required for non-members in order for the wedding date to be placed on the church calendar. The deposit will be returned after the wedding, less any charge for damages. Checks are to be made payable to the maintenance personnel. The church secretary will hold the check until all cleaning is complete.

BUILDING USE ……………………………………. Member - No Charge Non Member $400

WEDDING COORDINATOR: Represents Church at Rehearsal & Wedding ….................. $100

MAINTENANCE PERSONNEL: Rehearsal & Wedding in the Sanctuary........................... $100

MEDIA PERSONNEL

Sound …....................................................................................................................... $50

Video Projection ….….……………………………………………………………… $50

ORGANIST AND/OR PIANIST .…………………………………. $50 minimum is customary

Rehearsal Dinner

Your rehearsal dinner may be catered at our Family Life Center. The details need to be discussed with the Wedding Coordinator and fees are shown in the schedule below. Please make arrangements with a caterer as soon as possible. The rehearsal should precede your dinner.

Reception

Most receptions last between 1 and 2 hours. Evening receptions should be concluded by 9:00 pm. All caterers and anyone using the kitchen must review the use of the facilities with the Wedding Coordinator. Please be sure you give the caterer a copy of the Caterers and Helpers information page.

Reception and/or Rehearsal Dinner Fees

These fees are for facility preparation and cleaning before and after its use, including any removal and replacement of furniture so the facility can be cleaned before weekday or Sunday use.

MAINTENANCE PERSONNEL

← Family Life Center (Rehearsal – does not include kitchen, see page 8) …………………….. $50

← Family Life Center (Reception – does not include kitchen, see page 8) …………………….. $50

← Family Life Center (cleaning) …………….………………….......……………..………… ..$100

← Family Life Center (move and replace church’s chairs and tables) ……………….………… $50

← The above fee is waived if a rental service sets up and removes their chairs, tables, etc.

GUIDELINES FOR FAMILY LIFE CENTER AND KITCHEN USE

Use of the Kitchen

The kitchen may be used by individuals who have reviewed Shady Grove’s kitchen equipment and its use with someone from the church.

Kitchen appliances can be used ONLY AFTER:

The party and caterer have reviewed the proper operating procedures for each appliance.

Use of the refrigerator and/or freezer for storing items prior to the event must be arranged ahead of time, if there is adequate room in the refrigerator or freezer.

Only food to be used in the Family Life Center may be stored in the kitchen.

Church owned containers, pitchers, bowls, plates, utensils, etc., may NOT leave the facility. The caterer or responsible party must bring containers if leftovers are to be saved after the event.

For safety reasons, children under the age of 10 are allowed in the kitchen only under the direct supervision of the church hostess or the hostess’s designated representative.

Proper Clean Up:

1. Counter tops and tables must be wiped clean with a cloth and disinfectant (under the sink)

2. Dishes, utensils, flatware, glasses, pots and pans are to be washed and drained. Towels and cloths are to be hung on the line outside the kitchen door.

3. Appliances must be cleaned. The church will mop and sweep the floors.

4. All trash is to be placed in plastic bags and put outside the back kitchen door.

5. Any spills should be cleaned immediately for safety reasons.

6. Return all items to the place they were found.

7. The Family Life Center should be locked unless the hostess or church representative is present. They are responsible for cleaning and returning the kitchen to proper working order.

8. Each event's use of the kitchen will be scheduled in advance to allow an assigned church representative to be present.

WEDDING DATA SHEET

I understand FAILURE TO RETURN "DATA SHEET" within TWO WEEKS will release the tentative date originally scheduled for the use of another event. Leave information blank if you have not decided as it can be filled in later.

( ) Approved for Marriage by Shady Grove Pastor (date) _____________ ( ) Member ( ) Non-Member

Wedding Date _________________ Time _________ Rehearsal Date ________________ Time _________

Reception at Shady Grove? ____ Yes. If not, where? ______________________________________________

Rehearsal Dinner at Shady Grove ____ Yes. If not, where?______________________________________________

Wedding Planner’s name: ________________________________________________________________________

(Note: If a bride uses a wedding planner, they will work under the supervision of the church’s Wedding Coordinator.)

Name of Bride _____________________________________ Name of Groom______________________________

Address __________________________________________ Address ____________________________________

City _____________________ State ________ Zip _______ City __________________ State ________ Zip ____

Phone (home) ______________ Cell __________________ Phone (home)______________ Cell______________

Email ___________________________________________ Email______________________________________

Church Membership ________________________________ Church Membership __________________________

Permanent Address after Wedding

Street _____________________________ City _________________________ State _________ Zip ____________

Parent _____________________________________ Parent _____________________________________

Address ____________________________________ Address ____________________________________

City _________________State _______ Zip _______ City__________________ State _______ Zip _____

Phone (home) _______________ Cell ____________ Phone (home) ____________ Cell__ _____________

# Wedding Guests Expected to Invite ______ # Bride's Attendants ____ # Groom's Attendants ______

Flower Girls ______ Ring Bearer _____ It is strongly suggested both of these be at least 3 years old

Pianist ________________________________ Soloist _________________________________

Florist __________________________ Address _________________________ Phone _____________

Caterer _________________________ Address _________________________ Phone _____________

Photographer ____________________ Address _________________________ Phone _____________

Name and church of Pastor(s) performing wedding if not from Shady Grove:____________________________

Address _____________________________ Phone ________________ Email _______________________

We have read the wedding policies of Shady Grove Baptist Church and agree to abide by said policies. We understand we are responsible for any damage or destruction that may result to Church property related to the events of this wedding. We understand it is our responsibility to inform the wedding party, caterer, florist and photographer of the Shady Grove Baptist Church wedding policies.

Signatures of Groom __________________________________ Date _________________

Signatures of Bride __________________________________ Date _________________

WEDDING MUSIC APPROVAL SHEET

BRIDE: __________________________________________ PHONE: __________________________

GROOM: _________________________________________ PHONE: _________________________

WEDDING DATE: _________________________________ TIME: ___________________________

ORGANIST: _______________________________________ PHONE: _________________________

PIANIST: _________________________________________ PHONE: _________________________

VOCALISTS: ________________________________________________________________________

INSTRUMENTALISTS:________________________________________________________________

MUSICAL SELECTIONS

PRELUDE: ___________________________________________________________________________

PROCESSIONAL: _______________________________________________________ (Wedding Party)

______________________________________________________________________________ (Bride)

UNITY CANDLE (if used))

_____________________________________________________________________________________

RECESSIONAL: ______________________________________________________________________

POSTLUDE: _________________________________________________________________________

VOCAL SELECTIONS

PLEASE FURNISH COPIES of MUSIC

_____________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________

APPROVAL OF MINISTER OF MUSIC

Signature________________________________________________ Date _____________________

WEDDING PARTY PARTICIPANTS

BRIDE’S ATTENDANTS GROOM’S ATTENDANTS

List in the order they will stand next to the bride or groom in the ceremony.

Flower girl ___________________________ Ring Bearer ______________________

1.__________________________________ 1. ______________________________

2. _________________________________ 2. ______________________________

3. _________________________________ 3. ______________________________

4. _________________________________ 4. ______________________________

5. _________________________________ 5. ______________________________

6. _________________________________ 6. ______________________________

7. _________________________________ 7. ______________________________

8. _________________________________ 8. ______________________________

Who will give away the bride in marriage? __________________________________________________

Do you wish special seating for grandparents? If so, List them and their escorts

Who will usher the bride’s mother? __________________________

Who will usher the groom’s mother? _________________________

Will there be a memory or unity candle? ______________________

Give the Wedding Coordinator a copy or rough draft of your program as soon as you can. Any information, diagram or explanation will help to plan and make the rehearsal run more smoothly.

Wedding invitations

A copy of your wedding invitation should be given to the church secretary or Wedding Coordinator at least 2 weeks prior to the wedding if you desire to place it in the worship folder.

PHOTOGRAPHER

Please Give to the Photographer

WEDDINGS AT SHADY GROVE MISSIONARY BAPTIST CHURCH

111 Hwy 172, Monticello, AR 71655

(870) 367-3298

PHOTOGRAPHY & VIDEO TAPE

1. Photographs and video taping of your wedding are permitted within the following guidelines:

a. No flash photography during the wedding ceremony. This policy applies to all family and friends of the wedding party.

b. Flash pictures by the photographer are permissible during the ceremony.

c. Video taping of your ceremony is permitted with the camera personnel in fixed, unobtrusive locations.

d. The officiating pastor must be consulted regarding any exceptions to the photography/video policies.

2. Shady Grove is a smoke-free campus.

3. Shady Grove is a drug and alcohol-free campus.. No alcoholic beverage of any kind may be served or consumed on any part of the church’s premises.

4. Guests under the influence of drugs or alcohol will be asked to leave.

If you have any questions regarding these policies, please contact the office of

Shady Grove Baptist Church or the Wedding Coordinator:

FLORIST

Please Give to the Florist

WEDDINGS AT SHADY GROVE MISSIONARY BAPTIST CHURCH

111 HWY 172, MONTICELLO, AR

(870)367-3298

1. The bride is responsible for selecting the florist of her choice for the wedding.

2. The florist must decorate at times suitable to the schedule of the church, and must adhere to the policies of the church.

3. All decorations and decorating equipment must be furnished by the wedding party, florist and/or caterer. All decorations and equipment are to be removed IMMEDIATELY following the wedding.

4. Decorations (including pew markers) and equipment may not be attached using nails, tacks, stapled or taped to walls, woodwork, furniture or floors as this may deface church property. Please be respectful of all church property.

5. Pew hymnals and Bibles may not be removed for weddings. Neither may to be used as props or flower stands.

6. The Pulpit may be removed for the wedding. Only the church’s maintenance staff is approved to move church property.

7. Only the use of drip less candles is permitted with the use of a drop cloth. Candles must always be lit and extinguished with brass snuffers to prevent splatters. No candles may be used on the pews.

8. For December weddings, wedding decorations must work around church decorations.

9. Only silk or cloth flower petals are permitted for flower girls to drop down the aisle.

10. Birdseed is permitted to be used but only outside the building. No rice permitted.

11. Shady Grove is a smoke-free campus.

12. Shady Grove is a drug and alcohol-free campus No alcoholic beverage of any kind may be served or consumed on any part of Shady Grove’s premises. Guests under the influence of drugs or alcohol will be asked to leave.

If you have any questions regarding these policies, please contact the office of Shady Grove Baptist Church or your Wedding Coordinator.

CATERER

Please Give to the Caterer & Helpers

WEDDINGS AT SHADY GROVE MISSIONARY BAPTIST CHURCH

111 Hwy 172, Monticello, AR

(870) 367-3298

1. The bride is responsible for selecting the caterers of her choice for the wedding.

2. The caterer must decorate & prepare at times suitable to the schedule of the church, and must adhere

to the policies of the church.

3. All decorations and decorating equipment must be furnished by the wedding party, florist and/or

caterer. All of these are to be removed immediately following the wedding.

4. Decorations and equipment may not be attached using nails, tacks, stapled or taped to walls,

woodwork, furniture or floors. Please be respectful of all church property.

5. For December weddings, wedding decorations must be done around the church decorations.

6. Birdseed is permitted to be used but only outside the building. No rice permitted.

7. Shady Grove is a smoke-free campus.

8. Shady Grove is a drug and alcohol-free campus.

No alcoholic beverage of any kind may be served or consumed on any part of the church’s premises. Guests under the influence of drugs or alcohol will be asked to leave.

Use of the Kitchen

The kitchen will be used by individuals who have reviewed Shady Grove’s kitchen equipment and its use with an approved representative of the church.

Kitchen appliances can be used ONLY after:

1. The party and caterer have reviewed the proper operating procedures for each appliance.

2. Use of the refrigerator and/or freezer for storing items prior to the event must be arranged ahead

of time, if there is adequate room in the refrigerator or freezer.

3. Only food to be used in the Family Life Center may be stored in the kitchen.

4. Church owned containers, pitchers, bowls, plates, utensils, etc., may NOT leave the facility.

The caterer or responsible party must bring containers if leftovers are saved after the event.

5. For safety reasons, children under the age of 10 are allowed in the kitchen only under the direct

supervision of the church hostess or the hostess’s designated representative.

Proper Clean Up and Use of: Shady Grove Baptist Church Kitchen and Family Life Center

1. Counter tops and tables must be wiped clean with a cloth and disinfectant (under the sink)

2. Dishes, utensils, flatware, glasses, pots and pans are to be washed and drained. Towels and

cloths are to be hung on the line outside the kitchen door.

3. Appliances must be cleaned. The church will mop and sweep the floors.

4. All trash is to be placed in plastic bags and put outside the back kitchen door.

5. Any spills should be cleaned immediately for safety reasons.

6. Return all items to the place they were found.

7. The Family Life Center should be locked unless the hostess or church representative is present.

They are responsible for cleaning and returning the kitchen to proper working order.

8. Each event's use of the kitchen will be scheduled in advance to allow an assigned church

representative to be present.[pic]

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