DATING PERCEPTIONS AND EHAVIORS MONG RANDPARENTS

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: SINGLE

DATING PERCEPTIONS AND BEHAVIORS AMONG GRANDPARENTS

February 2019

RESEARCH | ? 2019 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

DOI:

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RESEARCH | ? 2019 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

EXECUTIVE SUMMARY

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Executive Summary

? Single grandparents are dating or at least open to it, and they are not doing it with (re)marriage in mind

? Almost 13 million single grandparents in the U.S. are actively open to dating, but they see a lot of challenges in finding compatible companions in today's dating world.

? Dating isn't about marriage for single grandparents, it's about companionship or finding a partner.

? When it comes to meeting new potential partners, single grandparents go the traditional route

? Friends and family are seen as the best way to meet new people. Although, most who would rather be set-up by family have yet to give it a try.

? Single grandparents look to pick up their dates offline. Overwhelmingly, dating sites, apps, and services are not used and their comfort level with these alternatives is on the low side.

? Dating norms and protocols, among single grandparents, look much like they used to in the good ol' days

? If you ask grandparents, they'll tell you that on a first date the man pays, and people meet in a neutral or safe meeting place (rather than at one another's home).

? Women aren't big believers in kissing on the first date and tend to wait for the man to call afterwards.

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RESEARCH | ? 2019 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

DETAILED FINDINGS: DATING BEHAVIORS, ATTITUDES & PROTOCOLS

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Single grandparents describe the dating world as vastly different from when they first entered the scene.

Casual Attitude

23%

"Now, it seems that it is all about sex. When I started dating, a good night kiss was the limit." Female, Age 75

"When I was dating, we did not get so familiar so fast. It is better to see how the minds connect first. Real intimacy

coming so soon puts stress on possibilities." Female, Age 71

"Marriage is no longer the main goal."

Male, Age 89

Technology

18%

"Everything seems to originate online these days. I prefer face to

face interaction." Male, Age 60

"I started dating 60 years ago...no computers, no cell phones, teens

borrowed their parents' cars." Female Age 74

"Social media has made dating easier to get to know a potential

friend." Female, Age 75

Communication

11%

"The person to person contact. Today it's text/cell phone or other means." Male, Age 79

"First and foremost when I started dating in the mid-late 50s there were no such things as cell phones or the internet so communicating was totally

different." Female, Age 76

"Now every one seems to be into the cell phone and no one on one

contact." Male, Age 83

Role of Women

7%

"Women are much more demanding and independent than decades ago when I first dated a

woman." Male, Age 79

"The female pays, picks up the man, no morals."

Female, Age 79

"Women are so much more forward. Dating someone you have only met on the internet."

Female, Age 74

Q23: In your own words, please tell us how dating has changed since you first started dating. Please be as specific as possible. Base: Grandparents (n=560)

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More than half of single grandparents are single and ready to mingle, but have varying perspectives on what it is like to date in 2019.

Dating Status

Thoughts on Dating

Dating Not dating, open to it Not dating, no desire

22% 34% 44%

Almost 13 million people

"It is fun to be with a person of similar experiences."

"I am looking to find and meet a

nice lady."

"Not interested in going through the ropes on dating."

"It is complicated. Very complicated."

"Today's world is totally different from years ago because people play way too many games. Most people are trying to get a booty call instead of building a strong friendship first."

Q1: Which of the following best describes your dating status? Q4: Now, assume you were speaking to a friend and they asked what it was like to be dating in today's world....what would you tell them? Please use a sentence or two to sum up how you feel about it, what your most recent experiences have been like ? good or bad. Base: Grandparents (n=560)

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While many may think that grandparents have conventional dating goals, marriage is not on their mind. Women are looking for a companionship and men for a partner.

Companionship

Partner but not marriage

Have fun, nothing serious

Marriage

Sexual or physically intimacy

Other

Q5: What would be your ideal outcome from dating? Base: Grandparents (n=560) RESEARCH | ? 2019 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Dating Goals

36%

Women are more likely (45% vs. 25% of men)

25%

Men are more likely (34% vs. 17% of women)

19%

12%

More likely among those under age 50 than age 50

and over (46% vs. 9%)

4%

4%

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The most important characteristic for a new date is the kind of person they are (e.g., their character traits), but men also focus heavily on their dates' looks.

63%

More important to women (65% vs.

52% for men)

61%

More important to men (50% vs. 23% for women)

Key Personal Traits

35%

31%

27%

25%

15%

13%

3%

2%

5%

The kind of

Values/

person they are priorities

Physical features

Physically active

Religious beliefs

Profession/ career/ financial

stability

Hobbies/ passions

Political beliefs

Q3d: What characteristics are/were most important to you when thinking about dating someone new/meeting your current partner? Base: Grandparents (n=560)

If have children

If have grandchildren

Other

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