Relationship Status: Single - Dating Perceptions and ...

Relationship Status: Single -- Dating Perceptions and Behaviors Among Generation X and Boomers

February 2019

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

DOI:

AARP RESEARCH

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

EXECUTIVE SUMMARY

AARP RESEARCH

Executive Summary

? Most single GenXers and Boomers are in the dating scene, or at least up for it, with the younger generation more actively on the prowl and looking for long-term commitment.

? Over three-quarters of single GenXers and almost two-thirds of single Boomers are actively open to dating, but they find it difficult to meet compatible companions in today's world dominated by online dating and casual romantic encounters.

? Dating isn't about marriage for single Boomers; it's about companionship. Single GenXers do have marriage on their mind.

? When it comes to meeting a new special someone, friends are the go-to matchmaker, but GenXers are more open than Boomers to bringing in technology as a matchmaker.

? Friends are seen as the best way to get set up by single GenXers and Boomers, with a chance meeting coming in second. ? Although not seen as the best way to meet a new date, GenXers are more comfy than Boomers meeting people through dating sites,

dating services, or social media.

? With GenXers leading the way, dating etiquette is shifting, with a higher interest in offbeat first-date activities and ladies gaining empowerment.

? Ask single GenXers and Boomers what makes for a great first date and they'll tell you the traditional dinner, lunch, or coffee. But GenXers are more interested than Boomers in the idea of a sport or unique experience to get to know someone new.

? GenX women are taking the reins more often than their Boomer counterparts by reaching out more to a guy after a great date and being more open to puckering up on a first date.

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

AARP RESEARCH 3

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

DETAILED FINDINGS: DATING BEHAVIORS, ATTITUDES, & PROTOCOLS

AARP RESEARCH

Single Boomers and GenXers alike see the dating scene as more casual nowadays and strongly influenced by technology.

Technology

29% (GenX) / 26% (Boomer)

Dating is more digital and online. Female, GenX

People meeting through dating sites or mobile apps. Male, Boomer

Casual Attitude

19% (Both)

Nobody seems to value dating or getting to know someone. It's all about social media status and no real values. Male, GenX

Things are way too fast for me now. Male, Boomer

Technology has definitely changed drastically the way that people communicate both in person and through devices. Male, GenX

Technology has changed the terms of dating. It's too complicated. Male, Boomer

I think that it has become harder because people can be deceptive about who they are online. Female, GenX

"Everything is online now and can't be sure who the person really is. More dangerous. Harder to find people my age. Not as sexual as I would like it to be due to diseases you can get. Female, Boomer

Dating now is all about sex. Instant gratification. It seems people no longer want to build a solid foundation to a relationship. Male, GenX

It's too casual, too much is expected from people. A man is so concerned about whether you exercise and expects a woman to be perfect, when he's not. No one wants any type of commitment and respect is hard to find. Female, Boomer

Dating today has no emotion involved. Female, GenX

Sex is expected way too soon. Female, Boomer

Base: Gen-Xers (n=536), Boomers (n=498) Q23: In your own words, please tell us how dating has changed since you first started dating. Please be as specific as possible.

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Communication

14% (GenX) / 16% (Boomer)

When I started dating, it was usually someone you met in person. Currently social media and online dating is playing a bigger part in how people meet. Male, GenX

No one talks anymore always texting. Female, Boomer

When I first started dating people talked on the phone and people do not do that anymore. Female, GenX

With the advent of cell phones communicating has become easier, more immediate, more anonymous, and more impersonal. Female, Boomer

Text! Female, GenX

There is just more minute by minute communication -- by cell, text, PC, landline, etc. Male, Boomer

AARP RESEARCH 5

Most single GenXers and Boomers are open to dating if not already doing so, but both groups feel that it is difficult to meet someone special with similar values.

Dating Status

Dating Not dating, open to it Not dating, no desire

22%

38%*

48%

44%

30%* GenX (n=536)

18% Boomers (n=498)

* Significant difference at 95% between generations

Base: Total Single Gen-Xers & Boomers Q1: Which of the following best describes your dating status?

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

I've gotten used to living on my own now and not dating, so it's difficult to start again. I'd probably start out as a friend to a woman and then it would proceed to get more serious.

Male, Boomer

It's fun to go out to dinner and out to the movies and dancing and have a good time with someone new.

Female, Boomer

A little more difficult because values have changed. Looking for compassionate, kind, loving, honest, loyal, and trustworthy men will be hard to find. I intend to give this to someone who has the right approach.

Female, GenX

Dating in today's world is difficult. Too many people are looking for random hook ups and not interested in a relationship.

Male, GenX

Online seems to be the dating scene. Male, GenX

For me today dating is looking online at dating sites. You search a few, email a bit, talk, then when I feel comfortable I will go out with them in person.

MalMe,aBleo,oBmoeormer

I think it's okay to date. You can get to know the person and see if you have anything in common. My last experience was great.

Female, GenX

Dating in today's world is complex. On the one hand, there are more different ways to meet people (e.g., online dating, etc.). On the other hand, with so many people dating online, I find that I meet and date more men than I did in years past, but the relationships seem more superficial nowadays.

Female, GenX

Q4: Now, assume you were speaking to a friend and they asked what it was like to be dating in today's world....what would you tell them? Please use a sentence or two to sum up how you feel about it, what your most recent experiences have been like ? good or bad.

AARP RESEARCH 6

Single Boomers are bucking tradition by looking for companionship rather than marriage. Their younger counterparts do have marriage on their minds.

Dating Goals

GenX (n=536) Boomers (n=498)

36%*

21%

24%

23%

34%*

12%

18%*

15%

Companionship

Partner but not marriage

Base: Total Single Gen-Xers & Boomers Q5: What would be your ideal outcome from dating?

Have fun, nothing serious

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Marriage

8%* 4%

3%

4%

Sexual or physical intimacy

Other

* Significant difference at 95% between generations

AARP RESEARCH 7

For both generations, how a new date presents themselves in the world (qualities, values) is more important than how they look or what they do for a living.

Key Personal Traits

GenX (n=536) Boomers (n=498)

69% 65%

62% 57%

Ensuring that someone is physically

active/not limited is more important to

Boomers

42% 40%

33% 30%

23%* 15%

19% 22%

27%* 20%

13% 9%

5% 2%

1% 1%

4% 3%

The kind of

Values/

person they are priorities

Physical features

Profession/ career/ financial

stability

Physically active

Religious beliefs

Hobbies/ passions

Political beliefs

If have children

If have grandchildren

Other

Base: Total Single Gen-Xers & Boomers Q3d: What characteristics are/were most important to you when thinking about dating someone new/meeting your current partner?

* Significant difference at 95% between generations

RESEARCH | ? 2018 AARP ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

AARP RESEARCH 8

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