Helping Your Teen With Homework
Helping Your Teen With Homework
Date updated: May 21, 2007
Content provided by KidsHealth
Just as grades are starting to matter more and assignments are becoming increasingly harder, teens are rapidly maturing, both physically and emotionally. Now, more than ever, many adolescents want to be independent and consider socializing a top priority. So homework and studying often have to be scheduled around teens' ever-growing list of to-do's - from after-school activities to part-time jobs to time spent with friends.
Now that many assignments are longer and more difficult, homework for students in middle school and high school can be intellectually and emotionally challenging for both parents and kids - gone are the days of times tables and grammar lessons. Some teens' homework can overwhelm even the most educated parent.
But the foundation for good study skills should be set during your child's elementary school years. By age 12, many students have learned the importance of organizing their work and managing their time. Many are motivated to do their best and are proud of the grades they earn. According to the U.S. Department of Education (USDE), from grade 7 on, kids who complete more homework not only score better on standardized tests, but also get better grades, on the average, than those students who do less homework.
Although teens need to feel independent as they grow older and become more mature, they also need their parents to continue to show interest and involvement in what they're doing, especially when it concerns school. In fact, according to the USDE, when parents are involved in their teens' lives and teachers and parents work closely together, teens do better academically. Unfortunately, parental involvement in school tends to drop off as soon as students hit high school, says the USDE. Whereas 75% of parents in the United States say they're highly or moderately involved in their 9-year-old's school-related activities, when kids reach age 14, parental involvement drops to 55% and continues to decrease as teens progress through high school, says the USDE.
So even though your child's need for independence is in full force now, it's never too late to make sure your adolescent is focusing enough time on schoolwork and still trying to do his or her best. A little encouragement and communication can go a long way in motivating your teen to succeed and develop the necessary skills for life after high school, while still leaving plenty of time for fun.
Setting Up Shop
Unlike younger kids who often like sitting down at the dining room table to be near Mom and Dad during homework time, teens often prefer to retreat to their own haven of privacy - their rooms. Even if your child is out of sight while toiling away, you may still want to check in periodically to make sure that he or she is focusing on the task at hand, rather than talking on the phone, chatting online with friends, playing video games, or watching TV.
Wherever your child opts to do homework, make sure your teen's routine includes a quiet, well-lit, distraction-free place to study, usually near the computer (if you have one). The space should be stocked with paper, pencils, a calculator, dictionary, thesaurus, and other supplies. The chair, desk, and computer space should be comfortable.
Many teens like to study with music, but you should have some say about the volume. The TV shouldn't be on when your teen is doing schoolwork, and if your teen seems distracted by phone calls or non-school-related computer use, consider limiting those activities until homework is completed.
Homework Help, Internet Style
Many students, both young and old, now use the Internet for homework help and research. But as most savvy teen Web users are well aware, inappropriate sexual and violent material is just a click away.
Some of the tools you can use to help make your teen's Web surfing safer and more productive include:
• parental controls or blocking options, which nearly all Internet service providers (ISPs) offer
• blocking software, which prohibits or blocks access to designated sites based on a "bad site" list compiled by the parent and the ISP
• filtering software, which uses keywords to block sites containing certain words and phrases
• outgoing filtering, which restricts personal information - such as name, address, and phone number - from being sent online
• monitoring and tracking software, which records the length of time spent on the Internet, time of day, sites visited, and time spent offline
But the best filter and monitoring device is you - if you give your teen access to a computer during homework time, it's a good idea to put it in a common space, not in the bedroom. This way, you can keep an eye on what your child is doing and discourage playing games, chatting with or emailing friends, or surfing the Net for fun.
Also, just because a site advertises itself as a homework help site, doesn't necessarily mean that the information on it is accurate. To help ensure that your teen is using the very best resources the Internet has to offer, suggest that your teen bookmark some favorite homework help Web addresses (KidsHealth, for example) to give your child easy access to reliable information.
It's also a good idea to talk to your teen about plagiarism. Let your child know that it's never OK to copy information directly from a website - and that the Internet should be used as a resource to help understand material being taught in class, not as a quick and easy way to complete assignments by using someone else's writing word for word.
Where You Come In
When it comes to homework, your role as a parent is a supporting one - you should encourage your teen to think, evaluate, and respond on his or her own. It's very important that you don't actually do the work yourself - this denies your adolescent the sense of achievement and can lessen what your child learns from the assignment. Allowing your teen to do the work on his or her own also reinforces the idea that teens need to be independent in many aspects of life and have to take responsibility for the work they do.
However, you should make yourself available for questions about the assignments, which may mean helping your teen understand instructions, listening to ideas, or reviewing the final product. Remember, your teen values your opinion, so be a supportive resource when needed.
Here are some tips to help you make homework easier on your busy teen:
• Sit down and go over your child's schedule together to see if your teen's life is more stressful than it needs to be, says the USDE. Help your teen to prioritize by dropping extracurricular activities, if necessary, or rearranging times, if possible. Although teens should determine their daily homework time slot, emphasize that studying should be a high priority and shouldn't be scheduled late every night. Learning shouldn't take a backseat to socializing and other non-school-related activities.
• Make sure your child has all of the supplies necessary to do his or her homework efficiently - for example, a backpack with multiple compartments; folders to organize assignments; appropriate calculators - if allowed - for more difficult homework in subjects such as algebra, trigonometry, and calculus; and a wall calendar or personal planner to record assignment due dates, tests, extracurricular practices, and rehearsals.
• Check in with your teen, just to see if he or she understands what needs to be done with assignments before hunkering down to do them, suggests the USDE.
• Help your teen avoid cramming by working out a schedule or outline of what needs to be done to prepare for a test or an assignment that requires extensive writing or research, says the USDE. For example, suggest certain resources online or, if your teen doesn't drive yet, take him or her to the library.
• Suggest that your child do harder assignments first. That way, he or she will be more alert and able to focus on tougher material, suggests the USDE. But be flexible and pay attention to your child's learning style - he or she may want to get the easy work out of the way first and save the heavier stuff until last.
• Engage your teen in thought-provoking discussions about classes, homework assignments, school projects, grades, and activities, focusing on the positive aspects of school. Your perspective can help your child apply what's being taught in school to the "outside" world.
Honing In on Homework Problems
Especially in the later grades, when your child will have multiple teachers, homework can really add up. And as work gets harder and harder, some students may have a more difficult time than others completing assignments, doing them correctly, or simply staying interested.
Communicating positively with your teen is essential if you want him or her to hear your message about why homework is so important, especially the closer a teen gets to graduating. You should be a listener first - and not do all the talking.
Here are suggestions for common scenarios that some parents might encounter with their middle school or high school students:
If your teen doesn't do or turn in homework, tell him or her that you know the homework wasn't completed and say, "I just want to know what's going on." This approach encourages honest, two-way communication, rather than a one-way lecture about homework that you've probably given a million times already. As you talk, tell your teen you're concerned and ask how you can help. Don't place blame or criticize your teen for failing to complete a homework assignment. If your teen consistently hands in homework late or not at all, let him or her know beforehand what the consequences will be. Repercussions should be immediate and for short periods of time. For example, don't allow your teen out with friends until assignments are completed, but don't strip your teen of all privileges until the next report card; that can destroy all motivation. And terminating involvement in sports or school clubs may not be a good idea because those activities teach self-discipline and social skills.
If your teen just isn't interested in homework, motivation strategies may help. First, it's important that you praise your teen for his or her effort - not just correctness. Letting your teen know you respect the time and effort put forth is powerful motivation for your teen to continue doing schoolwork. Because coursework is often more flexible in later grades, especially in high school, it might be a good idea to motivate your teen to do required work, with the opportunity to take on electives or internships in areas in which he or she may have more interest.
If your teen seems to be taking a long time to do homework, it's important to remember that all kids learn in different ways. Some need breaks, whereas others work better with a time limit. Other kids enjoy doing extra work. If you're concerned, though, that your child is spending too much time on homework, talk to your child first to find out if he or she is stuck on certain tasks and understands the directions.
If you're worried that your teen is getting too much or too little homework, talk with his or her teacher or school counselor to learn about the homework policies. Often, the teacher can clarify assignment objectives or review concepts taught in the classroom to make homework easier - and to make sure that your child grasps what's being taught.
If your teen is struggling with homework, make arrangements for a parent-teacher conference to discuss the problem. When schoolwork becomes more challenging, it isn't unusual to uncover a previously undiagnosed learning disability. If you or the teacher suspects a problem, he or she may recommend further educational testing.
If your teen consistently says he or she has no homework, you might want to contact your child's teacher. If it turns out that homework has been assigned and your child hasn't been completing it, you could ask the teacher to send home a homework notebook that requires your signature each school day to verify that you are aware of the homework assigned.
If your teen isn't doing homework because you suspect that he or she is cutting classes, talk to your child calmly - and immediately. Then, contact your teen's school counselor to discuss his or her performance, any changes in behavior, and steps you and the school can take to help ensure that your child actually attends school regularly.
Whatever the problem, don't get into battles over homework with your teen. If he or she consistently complains about how hard it is to do homework or you notice that your child seems to be really struggling with homework, this could indicate a possible problem, such as dyslexia, ADHD, or vision or hearing difficulties. Sometimes, though, a student may simply need to develop better study habits, be more detailed when writing down assignments, or keep them in one place such as a daily homework notebook, which can help both teens and parents know exactly what assignments are due and when.
Here are some strategies to help take the hassle out of homework if your teen is having a tough time:
• Suggest that your teen participate in study groups with friends. Together, kids can quiz each other, provide feedback, and model problem-solving activities. But if your teen ends up spending more time socializing than studying, he or she may be better off working alone.
• Help your teen be aware of his or her strengths, and find opportunities to capitalize on those strengths when doing homework assignments. Work with your teen to see what strategies work best for him or her and encourage your child to be creative.
• Keep track of how your teen is doing in between report cards, says the USDE, so that you won't have any surprises when the final grades are sent home, and so you can identify any problems that need to be addressed and tackle them early on. Know when tests or quizzes are scheduled in areas of difficulty, suggests the USDE, so that you can help your child prepare ahead of time.
Although it's extremely important, working in partnership with teachers can be difficult during the middle and high school years. Most kids don't want their parents anywhere near school, let alone having regular conferences with their teachers. But when your child isn't succeeding in school, it's important to keep the lines of communication open between you and your child's teachers, school counselors, and principal.
If particular assignments seem to be giving your child more trouble than others, send a note to the teacher pointing out the difficulties your child had. Phone calls and progress reports from teachers can also keep both you and your teen aware of expectations and achievement. You can also ask your child's teacher to send tests and quizzes home so you can track your child's progress. Or, you can talk with your teen's teachers to develop a homework checklist or notebook.
Most teachers are also available for extra help before or after school. But it's up to the student and parent to request and schedule any extra assistance. If the guidance counselor and teachers continue to be concerned, it may be helpful if you and your teen team up with them to plan support strategies, work to improve organizational skills, and discuss whether tutors or other additional support is necessary.
Intervening as early as possible when your teen needs help is essential to getting him or her back on track. Once a problem is identified, you can work with the school to ensure that your child receives the resources he or she needs.
A Lifetime of Learning
The key to truly helping your teen with homework is to not interfere too much. Make sure your teen knows that you're always available when he or she hits a snag, but let your child learn the importance of working independently. Encouraging your teen's efforts and determination and praising his or her hard work are crucial to motivating your child to succeed in school and in life.
With a little support from you, homework can be a positive experience for your teen - one that enriches learning, reinforces daily classroom lessons, and fosters lifelong skills that your child will need to succeed in school, college, and future employment.
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